Divided Path
by marysunshine81
Summary: Things didn't exactly work out for them in the past, but maybe they are entitled to a second chance. McHart AU
1. Chapter 1

_A/N:This is my contribution to TGWFandomfest. I had a very different idea of what I could share on such a special occasion, then this plot bunny happened and here I am. I didn't think I'd start a new multichapter anytime soon, but I didn't hesitate much. Special thanks to Kiki, whose review on my other McHart stroy inspired this one. To Ilona for the encouragement, the help with the descriptions I still need to improve at and the title. To Sab for offering to beta without thinking twice. And to Stine._

 _Before you think I don't know what I'm doing, I'd like to assure you that I do and don't at the same time. :D This fic is going to be a huge challenge, I'm well aware of that. I think it will be worth it though and I hope some of you will accompany me on this journey._

 _About the story: It's AU, but I'll try to tie it to canon as best as I can. There will be a present timeline and a past one in italics. Hope it won't be too hard to follow._

 _Reviews are always appreciated._

* * *

 **Divided Path**

 **Chapter One**

"Mr. McVeigh, the ballistics expert, is here to see you."

Diane's eyes shot wide open hearing the assistant's announcement through the line. The name and the occupation in one sentence, this couldn't be a coincidence, could it? And when she saw the tall figure in front of her office she immediately knew it wasn't.

He wasn't facing her, but she would recognize him anywhere. The broad shoulders and strong arms that used to held her tight. The by now grizzled hair, she could partly be blamed for. Not to mention the jeans, the boots and the jacket, that constituted his unique style, which hadn't changed at all throughout the years. Not even she had been able to achieve that.

Diane had no doubt that it was Kurt, yet she couldn't believe her eyes. When Will had told her he'd found a new ballistics expert for the case, it hadn't even occurred to her it could have been _him_. Their paths hadn't crossed on a professional level long enough for her to assume this day would never come.

He was still standing there now, ready to see her and if there was one thing she knew for sure it was that she wasn't ready.

But when the few minutes she'd asked for to compose herself after the shocking announcement passed way too quickly, she had no choice but to tell the assistant to let him in.

"Hey," he muttered once he was inside and seemed rather uneasy now that she was able to observe his face.

"Hey." It was all she was able to respond, although she was trying really hard to get her act together. "Take a seat." She remembered the polite gesture, even if it was probably harder to deal with his presence from closer.

She knew every inch of that face like she knew her own and could read his mind through his eyes, just like he could probably read hers. She was able to notice the insecurity in his greenish orbs, that's how she knew it wasn't just her. But she could also discover the admiration with which he still looked at her, and it made her feel even weaker.

"I'm here for the case." He attempted to help her out.

"Some kind of warning would have been nice," she noted, envying the advantage he had on her of having had time to prepare for this moment.

"I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable." He shifted his eyes on the ground.

"I know, it's just been a long time," she pointed out.

"Three years," he breathed out more to himself than to her.

She wasn't surprised he had the exact number ready, she remembered that day as if it was yesterday. And he definitely sounded like it meant something to him as well.

"That's a long time," she stated, and intentionally sounded unattached.

It may had been three years since the last time they'd met, but their _attachment_ had been over long before that. Or at least she thought it was, which was exactly why this unexpected visit from him made no sense to her and she couldn't understand her own reaction either. They had met several times in the past, but those meeting served a very different purpose.

"Yep, how have you been?" He voiced a natural interest as he leaned back in the armchair and got comfortable.

"Good, you?" She returned the courtesy, while she tried to avoid his eyes by staring at the file in front of her.

"Same." She heard him say and the shortness made her wonder if he'd noticed that's all it was, courtesy. And she almost felt guilty for her curtness, but it made her feel safer.

"So my business partner thinks you can help us with our case."

She was more than happy to switch to the real subject. Not that she was really thrilled at the idea of having him involved. But she knew he was one of the best ballistics experts in the area. And she couldn't help remembering the number of times she hadn't given him a call when she probably should have.

"I can. I can show you if you want," he responded nonchalantly.

"In your lab?" she asked, trying to stop herself from counting the number of years that had passed since the last time she'd stepped foot in that building. And she knew him well enough to assume that time probably stopped in there as well.

"Yeah. You can send an associate if you want." He offered a way out for her, but for some reason she wasn't willing to take it.

"Don't be silly. We are adults. And I appreciate the help." She let herself smile for a split second, for the first time since he'd entered her office. It actually felt good, a sign that she was getting slightly more comfortable in his presence.

"Okay. So how about tomorrow?" he proposed, seemingly content with her response.

"I'll call you after I finish in court," she promised, even though calling him wasn't as natural as she made it out to be.

"Okay," he nodded and began to emerge from his seat. Diane felt relief that it was over for now, only to see him sit back again. "Liam called, he said he needs to talk to me in person this weekend. It must be something important."

The sudden change of subject was unexpected and it made her wonder if he'd planned to mention it all along, or did it just to have an excuse to stay longer. But it definitely made a lot more sense for them to discuss this topic, even though lately there wasn't much use for it either. All three of them were living their own lives.

"He hasn't called me in a while," she noted, undecided if she was supposed to be jealous that their son had reached out to him, but not her.

"Maybe it's a guy thing," he suggested.

"Maybe," she agreed. And even if it wasn't a guy thing, she understood why Liam would turn to his father first and it was all right this way.

"I will tell you all about it if you want," he offered and she had to hide her appreciation. She didn't want to seem too vulnerable.

"That's okay, I'll talk to him anyway," she replied with faked confidence, hoping to fool him. All she knew was that Liam would tell her as well if it was something important, she just had to wait for her turn.

"All right. Talk to you tomorrow then." He did stand up this time.

"Tomorrow," she confirmed and she watched him leave the office while trying to process what just happened.

She was pretty sure the case was just an excuse and she was wondering what made him walk back into her life all of a sudden. She needed help with the Broussard defense, they just lost their ballistics expert in the middle of the trial. But did she need _his_ help? Were they really adults enough to have an all professional encounter despite their history? She liked to think they were, but then she would have hired him for cases in the past, yet she never did. And now he forced her to face the reason why.

"Did you like him?" Will's voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and his question was harder to answer than he probably imagined.

"What do you mean?" She eyed him with a confused expression on her face.

"I saw him in court a while ago, he's really good. Just what we need to win this," he explained and the coincidence made Diane smile.

Of all the ballistics experts, Will picked _him_. If only he knew.

"We will see. Thank you," she added.

She wasn't really sure that she'd still thank him later, but the uneasiness she'd felt before completely disappeared by now. She was aware that everything happened for a reason and maybe Kurt showing up on her doorstep again, after all these years, could turn out to be a good thing after all.

###

" _Diane, I'd like you to meet our ballistics expert for the Taylor case."_

 _The firm's name partner entered the office with a very young man on his side, so she immediately wondered how_ _could_ _someone be called an expert at his age._

" _Diane Lockhart,' she approached the younger man and extended her hand._

" _Kurt McVeigh," he said his name and after the required eye contact she noticed that he looked her up and down and rested his eyes on her legs for a few seconds._

 _That was the typical reaction she experienced from men. They somehow never could control their eyes facing an attractive woman in a shorter skirt. It was sadly true for Aiden as well, the fellow associate she shared the office with. Men were too predictable._

" _I'll leave you two to discuss the details. I expect a report from you on my desk tomorrow morning," her boss addressed Diane then left them alone, closing the door of the office behind him._

" _So you are an expert already? I'm only a junior associate," she noted from behind her desk again, where she appeared to be more in charge. She tried to hide that she felt a bit inferior, not that she had any reason to. If anything_ he _should have felt that way in his jeans, plaid shirt and cowboy boots. While she was wearing a designer suit. But he seemed more than comfortable leaning against the door. She could only hope he didn't notice her checking_ him _out._

" _I'm still learning every day, I have great teachers," he stated humbly, which made him kind of cute._

" _Let me guess, one of them knows my boss," she suggested the only reason why he could be on such an important case, and introduced to her by a name partner in person._

" _I suppose," he replied without admitting to anything._

" _So what are you going to show me?" She tried to prepare herself for the next step. She never met a ballistics expert before, so she didn't exactly know what to expect. It was typical from her boss to throw her into deep water time after time. That's how she learnt._

" _Are you ready?" His question sounded almost like a challenge._

" _You make it sound like I need to be." She chuckled a bit nervously._

" _First of all we have to drive out of town," he warned her._

" _Are you kidding me? To the country? Are you taking me to a cabin somewhere?" She felt a bit annoyed by the idea, but found it rather amusing at the same time._

" _You can never know." He was openly teasing her now and she wasn't sure anymore if she liked it or not._

" _Let me decide_ if _I want to go at all," she proposed, as if she could have found a way out of this._

" _Take your time," he offered with a smile and she had to admit that she really liked his smile._

" _Well_ _,_ _since my boss left me no choice, I guess I can't say no," she concluded and silently scolded herself for playing hard to get. She wasn't sure why he made her act that way._

" _That's the spirit," he sounded excited and it suited him even more than the smile._

" _You know what's funny? I hate guns, yet I'm working on a case involving guns already," she revealed as she quickly gathered some files from her desk._

" _We couldn't be more different. Unless..." He stopped mid_ _-_ _sentence and just stared at her as if he was trying to read her._

" _Unless what? Don't tell me you not only love guns, but you're also a Republican." It hit her all of a sudden, the guns, the attitude, his instructor being friends with her boss, it would make sense._

" _Guilty as charged," he admitted naturally and she began to laugh._

" _Oh my, guess we're looking at a fun drive."_

 _As she led him out of her office she found herself smiling. She had to get ready to pass the next hours with a Republican gun lover. Fortunately she was always up for a good challenge._


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: I'd like to thank everyone for the reviews and follows on this new project. I seem to be on a roll, which hasn't happened in a long time, so now it looks like I'll be able to update regularly. Fingers crossed!_

 _And Happy Birthday, Stine! 3_

* * *

 **Chapter Two**

Kurt really only needed an excuse to see her again. And although he could have found a personal one, he'd chosen the offer to work with her, thinking she'd be more open to that. When Will Gardner had contacted him he hadn't hesitated to say yes. Even though he had a feeling the lawyer had no idea who he was. But he hadn't given it more thought, he accepted the offer, confident that the case was winnable. And all he had to do was show her.

Of course first he had to get through the visit to her firm. It had been the first time he'd been there and he had to admit he'd felt pride seeing Diane's name on the wall. She was doing well professionally, that much was obvious. Whether she was doing well otherwise he had yet to determine. Their meeting hadn't given too much away. He'd caught her off guard, but he made the conclusion that altogether she hadn't found his visit unpleasant. And that was more than enough for a start.

And now that he was waiting for her to show up in his lab he had no doubt that he'd made the right choice reconnecting with her. The excitement he felt to see her again was already worth it.

It had been at least ten years since the last time Diane had set foot in the house. And for maybe the half of that time he'd thought it had been better that way. Their paths had divided and only crossed very rarely, mostly on special occasions. And he was convinced that it had been all right. There was still someone connecting them, and that was enough.

He'd tried to build himself a different life, a brand new one, he'd wished for it to be happier than their last years together had been. But the harder he'd tried, the less he'd succeeded. And after a while he found himself wanting to figure out why he and Diane hadn't been able to work it out in the past. And that's why he was back in her life again.

###

 _"That's right, you're here on another case," she tried to make it look like bumping into each other in the foyer of the courthouse was incidental, but both of them knew it wasn't. She clearly sought him out._

 _"That's right. You want_ _to_ _watch?" Kurt offered, but he was certain that wasn't why Diane showed up._

 _In fact he'd sort of expected to hear from her again, not quite like this though. But he admired her resourcefulness. He admired her beauty_ _even more_ _, that she perfectly showcased in the buddy hugging blue dress she was wearing. He wished to think it was all for him. Simply because he hadn't been able to get her out of his head ever since their first meeting._

 _"Oh, well, I... I would, but I'm late." She checked her watch, confirming his suspicion, but didn't spill the reason why she was there._

 _She just kept looking at him, even when she was already walking away, and he was halfway through the door. She was waiting for something, that much was obvious. So he decided to man up and take the next step._

 _"Dinner? Tomorrow night, 8 p.m. I'll pick you up at the office."_

 _His proposal sounded more like a statement than a question, but she didn't seem to mind. She looked like that was exactly what she wanted to hear. And fortunately she didn't hesitate long to answer._

" _I, uh, uh, o... okay," she mumbled, trying to hold back a chuckle._

 _And her girlish smile was all he could think about for the rest of the day._

###

"I've already checked," he pointed out and she stared back at him with disbelief.

"Checked what?" she asked.

"There was no evidence of a shooting in Mr. Broussard's car, but Mr. Knox reported one of his cars stolen, the day after the murder," he concluded with a satisfied grin on his face.

And that was the end of his demonstration. His task was to show her what could help her win the case, provide her client reasonable doubt and she seemed more than pleased with his findings.

"That's great news," she sounded genuinely happy. That's why she hired him after all, and he delivered exactly what she needed.

"I thought you would say that," he responded with barely hidden pride in his voice. It's been a while since they had worked together on a case and it felt great getting back to the old routine. For a few minutes it felt like they were back in the past and nothing ever changed.

"You're a lifesaver. We're going to need you to testify tomorrow." Her words were almost the exact ones he wanted to hear. The opportunity to see her again the next day presented itself rather easily, much to his pleasure.

"Sure thing," he reassured her.

"Well, I have to go," she announced and he started to panic.

He wasn't ready to let her go just yet. He hadn't had time to focus on her, because he'd been busy presenting his findings. Only now did he have the chance to observe her. She looked gorgeous in the black coat she'd refused to take off, but it was cold in there anyway. He couldn't help but notice that her beauty never faded. On the contrary, maybe it was the years of distance, but he'd probably never seen her that beautiful.

He wanted a chance to mention something other than business while he had her there. He was aware that it might ruin the moment, but he would have regretted not saying anything. Seeing her again, in that surrounding brought back all the memories. Not only good ones though, but he wished to focus only on those.

"You should have called me," he noted, hitting a very different tone than they had used so far.

"I'm sorry?" she eyed him confused.

He could tell that she hadn't expected anything like that. For a second he got lost in the eyes that used to look at him very differently in the past. This was new territory for both of them.

"For help with cases, I'm available. I'm not away too often anymore," he clarified.

Once Liam had started college he'd used the opportunity to travel as often as he could, taking cases in farther parts of the country. He wanted to be away, to forget, although it didn't exactly work out the way he'd planned.

"That's good to know," she responded, but he wasn't sure she meant it.

Now that they were done talking about the case, he could tell she felt uncomfortable in his presence.

"Do you think maybe we could have lunch sometime?" he offered, hoping to ease the tension a little. He would rather have said dinner, but he figured she was more likely to reject that offer. All he wished for was a little more time together, to talk, reconnect and see where it would lead.

"Do you think that's a good idea?" she pointed out and made him think of what happened the last time they'd shared a meal. It was actually the three of them, three years ago, on their son's twenty-fifth birthday. It had been a nice evening until he brought up something he probably shouldn't have. He wished to be smarter this time.

"Why don't we find out?" he proposed, awaiting her answer patiently.

"Let me think about it," she gave him something much better than a 'no' and he took it happily.

###

 _"So now that you've bought me dinner, what's next?" she inquired in a tone that suggested she couldn't wait to find out how their evening would continue._

 _And he was rather curious himself. He took her to a small restaurant close to her office. It wasn't anything fancy, but she didn't seem to mind. Their dinner had gone by rather fast, it was mostly her talking and him listening, but he didn't mind. He enjoyed listening to her voice, there was something fascinating about it, about her._

 _"It's all up to you," he shrugged._

 _He didn't want to rush into anything with her, simply because he was aware that she was special. But it's not like he was the one running after her. He'd thought the political difference would scare her off, but that wasn't the case. On the contrary. They actually had fun arguing about things, there was never a boring moment when they were together._

 _"You know if my father finds out I'm on a date with a Republican, he might disown me," she chuckled and the sound combined with the image made her very adorable. He couldn't take his eyes off her._

 _She was one of the most attractive women he'd ever met and considering she made it obvious that she was interested in him as well, he would have been a fool to fight this attraction._

 _"Really?" he flashed him a challenging smile and already imagined what it would feel like kissing those desirable lips. He was pretty sure she had the same thought on her mind._

 _"Actually all three generations of my Democratic ancestors are probably screaming out in protest right now," she revealed, but he really couldn't care less and by her tone he figured she couldn't either._

 _"Why don't we give them something to scream about," he suggested and moved closer to her._

 _When she didn't move away he slowly placed his lips on hers and began to kiss them softly. Her lips tasted like beer and were as responsive as he'd hoped them to be. When their tongues met he could tell that she hadn't just played with him, she desired him just as much as he desired her._

###

When he found a wrapped box on his desk with a brown bow on top, he knew it could only have been from one person.

 _'Thank you, I'll call you about lunch.'_

Her sweet handwritten note made him smile. He helped her with the case and this was how she thanked him. But most importantly she gave him hope and hope was all he needed right now.

Then he opened the box and burst out in laughter. He remembered that she'd noticed the photo of him with Palin when she'd been there the other day. She'd even rolled her eyes at it and apparently this was her response.

'Going Rouge: A Candid Look Inside The Mind Of Political Conservative Sarah Palin'

Flipping through the empty pages of the book brought back all the memories. He had to admit that he actually missed this. Her sense of humor was one of the reasons why he'd fallen in love with her.

###

 _"I don't want you to think it's that easy to get me to bed," she noted, although her hands were all over him ever since they'd entered her apartment._

 _He honestly hadn't thought they would get this far tonight, but she was simply irresistible. She'd already made it quite clear in the restaurant that despite the differences and the voices in her head she wanted him and he couldn't deny that he felt the same way, his body would have given him away anyway._

 _"I'm not judging," he smiled into their next kiss. "It's actually nice that you're trying to make up for the fact that your boss didn't hire me," he added in a teasing tone._

 _He didn't really care though. It had only been a case and something good already came out of it. He got the girl, hopefully not just for one night._

 _"Excuse me?" She took offence at his words as he'd expected._

 _"I was joking, but it looks like I left a good impression on someone else," he pointed out, while she was busy unbuttoning his shirt._

 _He was becoming more daring. He'd wanted to treat her like a lady, because that's what he thought she deserved. But she made it very clear that she didn't need any special treatment._

 _"Don't flatter yourself, cowboy," she warned him and pushed him on the bed, which turned him on even more._

 _Just like the name he called her. From his clothes, especially the cowboy boots and the fact that he was living in the country she seemed to have concluded that he was a cowboy and he didn't want to correct her. In fact as long as she kissed and touched him that way, she was allowed to call him whatever she wished._

 _"Want me to leave?" he offered unwillingly, attempting to emerge from his position, but she landed on top of him._

 _"You're not going anywhere," she declared and prevented him from uttering another argument for the rest of the night._


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Diane was pacing back and forth in the part of her office that wasn't visible to her partner on the other side of the corridor. She wanted to see clearly, to be confident that the decision she made was really necessary. She and Will weren't doing well as fellow name partners lately. Ever since Jonas had left with his clients, threatening to come back for theirs, there had been constant tension and it felt like a small war at Lockhart/Gardner. Both her and Will had their troops, and the attacks - like him trying to fire one of her people recently – were followed by counterattacks.

What she wanted to talk to him about was more on the personal side, but it had something to do with their firm, that's why she was about to reveal it to him, even if that meant leaving herself vulnerable on some level. Despite their differences though, she was quite certain that Will wouldn't use a personal information for professional gain. They had only been partners for a few years, but their relationship had always been based on mutual respect.

"Hey, do you have a minute?"

She stepped inside his office a bit later and he actually seemed grateful for the interruption, because he invited her in with a smile.

"Of course. Congrats on the Broussard case," he mentioned attentively, as if he knew that the case was the exact reason why she was there.

"It was a team effort, you also contributed," she remembered to give him credit, he was the one finding their ballistics expert after all. But these couple of days hadn't been enough for her to figure out if it was a good or a bad thing that they'd hired Kurt.

"I'm glad McVeigh worked out," he acknowledged her comment with another smile.

"Yeah, me too, which is why I need to talk to you."

She closed the glass door and slowly approached his couch. There was no way back now, she kept her eyes on the ground, while she gathered her thoughts.

"I'm listening." Will's voice came from closer than she'd expected and when she looked up he was already near the couch as well.

She waited for him to sit down before she voiced the carefully formed words.

"Kurt McVeigh is my ex-husband."

She was a bit anxious about saying it out loud, because she hadn't talked about her personal life with Will before. It wasn't exactly a secret, anyone could have easily found out she'd been married before. Although Will didn't seem like the type to investigate his partner and pry into her private life.

"Wow, that's a small world, I had no idea," he admitted and she wasn't sure if he meant he had no idea she'd been married or only that Kurt was the one she used to be married to.

It had only been a few days ago that they had talked about marriage being a mysterious institution. They were defending a husband and a wife who were possible murder suspects in the same case. The wife was Diane's friend. And Diane knew it well that no marriage was perfect, her own had definitely not been one.

"It ended a long time ago, I haven't seen him in years, but...we have a son."

That's another detail about her life she'd kept hidden from him. It somehow hadn't come up when they'd met and even though she would have had the opportunity she'd never revealed it to him. And it wasn't because she didn't consider him a friend, but it was something she didn't really talk about with basically anyone.

"So you do have a son?" he grinned at her, and the lack of surprise on his face made it obvious that he'd already known. "I've been wondering how much longer was it going to take for you to bring it up," he added, avoiding the teasing tone to keep the seriousness of the conversation, which she appreciated.

"I don't really talk about him," she confessed with a lump in her throat, not questioning how he knew. He could have heard it from anyone. But she was glad that he'd waited for her to tell him first, it showed that he respected her decision to conceal it until now.

Truth be told she just wasn't the type of mother to have her kid's photo on display in her office, and brag about him to everyone, she preferred to keep her private life private. At the firm she was Diane Lockhart, the name partner and not Diane the mother or ex-wife, those facts had nothing to do with her work. She did have photos of Liam in her wallet though, so in a way he was always with her and not only in her heart.

"Can I ask why?" Will voiced the most important question she'd already prepared the answer for. It was crucial for her that he understood, even if she didn't always understand it herself.

"It's the part of my life I'm not exactly proud of. I mean, I'm proud of Liam, that's his name, he's graduated from Yale School of Medicine and he's a resident now at Northwestern Memorial. He wants to become a surgeon. But I pretty much failed as a wife and a mother, I guess I wasn't fit for those tasks," she admitted what she wouldn't admit to many people. But she knew that she could show some weakness in front of him without being afraid of getting judged.

"I'm sorry," he touched her hand gently as a sign of comfort, which made her feel a bit better. It showed that she had no reason to regret opening up to him.

"It's okay, somehow I learnt to live with this burden and I've always tried to compensate with work, and get as successful as I possibly can. I just don't think my son will ever forgive me for that," she sighed, realizing she may have revealed too much at once, so she stopped. "Anyway, I guess I just wanted you to know, that's all." She tried to put a quick end to their short conversation about her past.

She had basically chosen her career over her family. Back then it hadn't exactly felt like a choice, more like something she had to do to get ahead in the field of law. A client, a trial date or an urgent case had always come first. That's how she'd become the name partner of a prestigious law firm in Chicago in the end. That's also how she'd ruined her marriage and basically let her - now ex - husband be the parent their son had always deserved, but one she hadn't really been.

"Thank you and of course if you don't want me to hire McVeigh again in the future, I'd understand."

She appreciated it, but it wasn't why she'd told him all this. She'd been in trouble once before for not disclosing her relationship with Kurt, she didn't want to make the same mistake again. She also didn't want Will to get blindsided once, he had the right to know.

"I don't know, he's still one of the best in the business and he even offered to work for us again, in case we need him."

She hadn't decided yet if she should take his offer. She also wasn't sure if she should accept his lunch invitation. She didn't feel that anything good could come out of that. She didn't understand his intentions at all and that confused her. But somehow working together had felt better than she'd imagined.

"And how would you feel about that?" Will inquired attentively.

"Honestly? I have no idea," she admitted.

"That's okay, I'm sure you'll figure it out. Give it some time," he suggested and she was grateful for the listening ear and his understanding. She was ready to stand up when Will touched her arm again. "Look, I know we're going through a lot of turmoil here over the direction of the firm, with Stern gone and all, but wherever we end up... I respect you, Diane."

She knew that he did, the feeling was mutual, she liked hearing it though. Still she decided to make fun of his thoughtful statement, for some reason she couldn't help it.

"Didn't they say that to Secretariat before they put him down?"

His look suggested that he didn't mind the teasing.

"I don't think they said _Diane_ ," he pointed out and it made her smile.

And with that being said she bid him goodnight and was relieved to have this difficult conversation behind her. The mere thought of the impossible situation she'd been caught up in in the past made her shiver. Having met Kurt McVeigh almost ruined her promising career path even before it had really started.

###

 _Diane rushed out of the courtroom, tears streaming down her face. She hadn't been humiliated like this ever and she didn't know if she would be able to enter the courthouse ever again or go back to her workplace for that matter. She almost felt like it was the end of the world, because of what had just happened behind the heavy door._

 _"You'll be in my office first thing tomorrow morning." Her boss' tone and expression hadn't suggested anything good for that conversation, in fact she was pretty much convinced that she was going to be fired. So it was probably pointless to even go in the next morning. She should have just stayed home and started looking for another job, preferably in a different city. Especially because once her father found out about this incident he would probably be very ashamed of her too._

 _Not that she had done anything wrong. She'd slept with a man before her boss had decided to hire him as their expert witness after all. And once Kurt was on the stand the ASA just happened to mention that someone had seen him and Diane making out in a restaurant and leaving together. He thought he had put two and two together and it was enough for Diane's boss to get blindsided and humiliated in court. The jury had probably drown their own conclusion and it definitely didn't help their case that someone on the defense team had slept with the expert witness. If anything it looked really suspicious and made Kurt's testimony a lot less reliable in their eyes._

 _Diane's boss was basically accused of buying witness testimonies with sexual favors and it was just as humiliating for Kurt_ _as well._ _She was willing to bet that was the last time she heard from him. Which was a pity, because she really liked him, despite of or maybe because of their differences. It was fun to spar with him, but more importantly he was a really great kisser and Diane didn't mind having shared her bed with him. Not until now anyway. In fact she would have loved to see him again. It was too late though._

 _She really just wished to hide from the world, starting tonight. So she rushed home and opened a bottle of wine, hoping to forget. So when an hour later the phone rang in her apartment she just decided to ignore it. She was busy drowning her sorrow into a larger sized pizza and sipping her second glass of wine. But the unknown caller was persistent and at some point the ringing began to drive her crazy._

" _Who is it?" she answered the call in a very rude manner that was normally unlike her, not tonight though._

 _"Hey, just wanted to make sure you're okay." She was more than surprised to hear Kurt's voice. She couldn't believe he actually called._

 _"I'm fine. How about you?" her voice softened right away._

 _"Don't worry about me," he reassured her. But she was worried about both of them._

 _"We probably screwed up our careers," she pointed out bitterly._

 _"Why would you say that?" he didn't sound upset at all._

 _"I'm pretty sure I'm getting fired tomorrow," she revealed her biggest fear._

 _She should have had the guts to tell her boss that she'd slept with their expert witness, even though she couldn't have known the ASA had anything like that up his sleeve._

 _"You shouldn't think like that," he tried to sound positive and cool about the events._

 _"But that's how I think. I can't help it. I'm ashamed of myself," she admitted, shifting her eyes on the ground as if he was in the room and not on the other end of the line._

 _"Do you regret what happened between us?" His question didn't catch her off guard, because she_ _knew_ _how she felt about him._

 _"No, I like you, and we did nothing wrong. I'm really glad you called," she expressed her gratitude. It meant so much to her that he didn't just abandon her, any other guy would probably have done that. That's how she knew he was special._

 _"Do you want me to come over?" he offered something even more unexpected._

 _"Now?" she asked, mainly because she wasn't sure it was right to let the other night repeat itself in the light of today's incident._

 _"Yes," he insisted._

 _For her the main question was if she wanted to be alone tonight and that's what made the decision for her_ _._ _"I'd like that."_

 _"I'll be there in a half hour," he promised._

 _"Okay." She found herself smiling and it felt good to not feel miserable anymore, simply because she wasn't alone in this._

 _"And Diane…" She heard his voice before she put down the receiver. "I really like you_ _,_ _too."_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

With his son sitting across from him on the sofa, Kurt's feeling of familiarity was combined with the realization that he missed having him around. He wished Liam had accepted his suggestion to move back home after med school, even if he was aware that standing on his own two feet was important for the young surgeon to be. But the huge house was very empty without him and it weighed on Kurt even more now that he was spending more time there, alone.

He'd even considered selling it after Liam had left for college, but never made the final decision. It was his inheritance after all, he had renovated it with his own two hands and built the lab where he spent most of his time to the very day.

After the death of his mother he'd tried to convince Diane that they should move to the farm, where there was a lot more space, fresh air and silence. He'd grown up there as a kid and wanted the same for his son. In the end he had gotten what he wanted, not in the exact way though.

"I miss the silence," Liam mentioned, making his father smile.

Despite having lived in Chicago for ten years Kurt could never get used to the noise either.

"You're welcome to stay here anytime," he reminded him of his offer.

"I know, thank you." The boy's lips curled up, but only for a split second.

Kurt could tell that he was nervous from the way he avoided his gaze often and the tapping of his feet on the carpet. He didn't want to rush him. He'd come there because he wanted to tell him something and he'd wait patiently until he's ready.

"You seem tired," he noted, hoping Liam wouldn't take it the wrong way. He definitely looked like he could use at least a day of extra sleep. Kurt wished he had still been allowed to take care of him, but his time had ended years ago. Liam was an adult now, who needed to take care of himself.

"I could use some sleep right now," he admitted, and to Kurt's relief he seemed to appreciate his concern.

"Why don't you take a quick nap? I could make us some dinner and we'll talk then," he offered, hoping to hear him say yes.

"Eryn is pregnant." He said something completely different and for a few seconds they both were just staring at each other.

Liam had met Eryn in college and even though they had their ups and downs throughout the years, they were still together. Kurt kind of expected them to get engaged someday, probably soon. This announcement wasn't something he was prepared for, still he knew he had to react some way.

"Congratulations," he uttered the only word he could think of right away and tried to send him an encouraging smile, even though he could already tell that Liam didn't seem happy.

"She isn't sure if she wants to keep the baby," he revealed what Kurt assumed was the reason for his bad mood, unaware that to his father the statement sounded more painful than he could ever have imagined. Because for the same reason Liam's existence had been the topic of a conversation that had happened between Kurt and the boy's mother almost thirty years ago.

###

" _I'm not sure if I want to keep this baby."_

 _Diane's honest confession came as a shock to him, way too soon after she'd announced what he thought was amazing news. She was expecting a baby, their baby and even though they had only been dating for a few weeks and weren't planning their common future yet, let alone a baby, he was still extremely happy, up until this moment._

" _Please don't say that," he begged her, secretly hoping she hadn't meant_ _it. Maybe_ _she wasn't thinking clearly_ _. Even though she'd had more time to digest the news. Apparently it wasn't exactly an advantage._

" _I'm lucky I still have a job after the courtroom fiasco, no way I'm telling my boss I'm leaving because I'm pregnant, now that he's given me a second chance." She seemed determined and even though he admired this quality in her, he hated her determination at that moment._

" _I don't think your boss should have anything to do with this," he pointed out calmly. He didn't want to upset her, but he couldn't just let her make this decision without weighing in._

" _I'm not ready for this Kurt, I'm not even sure I ever want to be a mother, but now it's definitely way too early," she tried to defend her point of view, and every word felt like someone was poking him with a knife._

 _And it wasn't because he was ready to be a father, they were both young, he was aware, but even if he only heard of this baby a few minutes ago, he was already in love with it._

" _All I'm asking is that you think about it some more," he was begging her again, because that was all he could do._

 _He knew that she would make this decision on her own, because it was her choice. How he hated that word more than anything right now and it had nothing to do with his political beliefs. He wanted to have a say in this, he selfishly wanted for her to keep this baby without thinking about it twice, even if it was her who had to make a sacrifice._

" _I'm sorry," she burst out in tears and his first reaction was to wrap his arms around her._

 _He wanted her to know that they were in this together, that he was there for her. In fact he was already starting to fall in love with her. He hadn't said it yet, but he was hoping his actions spoke for themselves. And he was almost certain she felt the same way._

 _For a second he considered voicing his feelings, this moment would have been the perfect opportunity. But then he thought of the decision she was about to make and he wasn't sure his love would survive if she was going to go through with it._

###

"How do you feel about it?" Kurt inquired, remembering well his own feelings even if almost three decades had passed since that conversation. He wouldn't tell Liam about it though, he couldn't do that to Diane. She hadn't been sure about wanting a kid at first, but it never meant that she loved Liam any less.

"I'd like her to keep it, but I don't want to push her," he explained and Kurt wondered how did it happen so fast. His boy wasn't a boy anymore, he could be a father in a few months. He was about the same age as Kurt had been when he'd found out about him.

"That's smart," he noted, that was his strategy too back then. He hoped that the girl wouldn't rush into a decision. It was his grandkid she was carrying after all and the mere thought filled his heart with joy. Just like the first time he'd heard about his son.

"Do you think I should ask her to marry me?"

Liam's question reminded him of the struggle he used to have. He had debated whether asking Diane to marry him had made it all worse instead of better. He had meant well, but Diane had been proud of her independence. Even after all these years he still wasn't sure she would ever have married him if he hadn't gotten her pregnant.

"Do you want to marry her, or is it only because of the baby?"

He used to ask himself the same question, so he knew it was hard to answer. And his mother had done too when he'd had a similar conversation with her. It had been a very different situation though, because of the shortness of their relationship with Diane, and the morals had also been different back then. Today an unwed mother wasn't anything special anymore.

"I've been thinking about it for a while, but I figured there was no reason to rush into anything," he shrugged.

Kurt suspected that his son's opinion about marriage was heavily influenced by his parents' failed attempt that he had suffered under. And he couldn't really blame him. That's why Kurt wasn't sure how to advise him on this matter. Maybe marrying Diane because of the baby wasn't the best decision he'd ever made, but he never regretted it.

"Make sure she knows that you're there for her however she decides." He gave him the best advice he could think of.

"I will," he promised and Kurt wished he could have helped him more, but he was aware that this was probably out of their hands anyway. He could only hope Eryn would make the right decision.

"Will you tell your mother about this?" he asked all of a sudden and Liam seemed surprised, probably due to the mention of Diane. It wasn't often that they talked about her, Kurt didn't really want to in the past and he assumed Liam avoided the topic on purpose too most of the time.

"Yeah, just wanted to tell you first," he pointed out and Kurt appreciated the gesture.

"I helped her on a case this week," he revealed. He wasn't even sure if he should tell him, but it was out before he could think better of it.

"I had no idea you two are talking again," Liam admitted, and looked very confused.

"His law firm partner contacted me, it was very sudden, but I said yes and she won the case," he added happily.

"That's good that you could help," Liam noted, but didn't seem too excited, so Kurt decided not to tell him about the possible lunch. He had enough on his plate as it was anyway.

"Yep…so how about my offer from earlier, want to stay for dinner?" he closed the sensitive subject quickly.

"I wish I could, but Eryn and I have plans. Rain check?" he suggested.

"Of course, you should both come next time," he offered. He liked Eryn. He wouldn't have minded if Liam had married the girl. They made a really nice couple. He could already picture a little boy or a girl with green eyes and dark blonde hair, just like Liam used to be.

"I'll tell her, I'm sure she'll be happy to see you again," he reassured him.

"I really hope things will work out for the best with you two, but no matter what happens don't forget that I'm here for you, always," Kurt voiced something that was hopefully what his son needed to hear. Liam had always known that he could count on him and that didn't change just because he was all grown up.

"Thank you, dad," he responded with an appreciative smile. "And as for mom, I just hope you know what you're doing," he brought up their previous subject.

"I appreciate your concern," Kurt noted. He knew very well what he meant. And he was right in assuming that he didn't know what he was doing exactly.

"I just don't want you to get hurt," Liam clarified and it was ironic how he was looking out for him, especially under the circumstances. But Kurt was very grateful. Not for the reminder, but for having him on his side.

###

" _We should get married," he breathed out as they were lying in bed in each other's arms._

 _He was holding her close, and it felt wonderful. Her belly was touching his and he couldn't help thinking of their baby inside. He had to stop himself from trying to caress it. He didn't want to_ _seem_ _too eager. But at that moment he wouldn't have minded sharing a bed with her every single night, for the rest of their lives._

" _You're only saying that because I'm pregnant," she pointed out, but he figured that it was a good sign that she didn't reject the idea right away._

" _Maybe," he admitted, "but maybe I just want to spend the rest of my life with you," he added seriously._

 _He was aware that she was a woman any man would be lucky to have. But in his eyes she was even more than that, she was the mother of their child._

" _Was that a proposal?" she peeked up at him and his eyes met hers._

 _He could tell that she was flattered by his unexpected suggestion. Maybe he was the first man who ever proposed to her. Although most likely he wasn't. He might ask her someday._

" _I think so," he admitted and she seemed perplexed, trying to hide her gaze again._

" _We've only known each other for less than two months. Don't you think we're going a little too fast?" she pointed out, and he found it promising how she seriously considered his offer._

" _Hush," he pressed his finger to her lips, "you don't have to answer now, just think about it."_

 _He placed a soft kiss on her lips to seal his words. It was his way of showing her he was there for her and their baby, if she needed him to be._

" _You've surely given me a lot to think about tonight," she responded and tightened her grasp around him._

 _That's how he knew that she cared and appreciated everything that he'd_ _said_ _and done that night. He could also have told her that he loved her. But he didn't want her to think he was lying to influence her decision. It was important for him that she knew he was honest. That he was someone she could count on. And he already made that clear._

 _That's why he was certain that she would make sure to think it through properly before she made a final decision about their future._


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Diane didn't have much time to prepare for her son's visit. He'd only announced it the night before, but she'd been more than happy to say yes. She hadn't seen him since Christmas, so she always cherished those rare moments with him. She wrapped her arms around him happily as soon as he entered the door and only let go fast not to make him feel too uncomfortable.

Liam still had his own room in Diane's apartment, although he hadn't spent the night there in years. It had been his room from the day he was born, only the color of the walls, the furniture and the decoration changed from time to time. After Liam had moved to his own place in Chicago, Diane kept his room exactly the way he'd left it. She would have given anything to have him stay there again someday.

Sometimes when she was lying awake in the middle of the night she thought back at those years when Liam had slept in the other room. She hadn't been able to spend enough time with him in the past and she hadn't even made the best of what she'd got, she was aware of that. And her conscience was the cruelest to her when she was alone in the dark, with only her thoughts to accompany her.

But having him there again, even for a short while, already made her happy. And she was looking forward to finding out about the reason for his visit. She didn't want to guess, she was just glad it was important enough to tell her in person and really hoped for something good. Liam announcing that his longtime girlfriend was pregnant wasn't really on her imaginary list though. And his statement immediately forced her on another trip down memory lane, for the umpteenth time that week.

###

 _"Congratulations ma'am, you're pregnant, I'm sure your husband will be thrilled about the news too," the doctor announced and Diane's head suddenly started spinning._

 _She'd chosen a doctor who had no clue who she was and up until now it seemed like a good idea. But once he confirmed her suspicion all she wanted to do was scream, even though she wasn't allowed. She had to pretend to be happy, force a polite smile on her face, even if there was a storm threatening to break out inside._

 _She didn't have a husband, hell she didn't want a husband, let alone a kid. Not now when she was focusing on building a career. She wanted to make a name for herself, not let a man determine who she was. She wanted to be Diane Lockhart, the lawyer, have her own firm someday, not to be called the wife or the mother of someone. How could she screw it all up?_

 _She couldn't wait to leave and be alone to think. She had no idea what she should do now. On her way out of the building her thoughts wandered to Kurt. Should she even tell him that she was carrying his baby? She really liked him, they were having fun, but with that news the fun part was most likely over._

 _They could become parents, she could have a child with someone whose political values couldn't have been_ _farther_ _from hers. All of a sudden their liaison didn't seem like such a good idea anymore. He could have been the sweetest man in the world, but this wasn't what she wanted. Sleeping with him was one thing, raising a child together was something she wasn't ready for. They should have been more careful._

 _She was aware that he was the closest thing she had to a relationship ever since she'd started working. And she couldn't deny that he actually made her happy. But the happy phase was over too soon. The thought of having to face him with this news made her stomach turn. Especially because she had no doubt how he would react. While she wasn't even sure if she wanted to keep this baby on the first place._

###

"What's the plan?" she inquired, after congratulating Liam on the news. He didn't seem entirely happy about it, so she figured that was only part of the announcement.

"She isn't sure if she's keeping it yet, so I have no idea, but I wanted you to know either way."

Diane assumed he'd already told his father, probably even asked for his advice. The two of them had always been very close, which she would have been jealous of, hadn't it been her own fault. That's why she was simply happy with being informed.

"I really appreciate that," she smiled. "Would you like her to keep it?" she inquired out of curiosity.

If Eryn decided to keep the baby, that would be her grandchild. Hers and Kurt's. The thought left her mind as fast as it had come, there was no point thinking about it until the girl made her decision.

"I do. I mean, I love her and it would be our child." His lips curled up and Diane couldn't help thinking he looked so much like his father did at his age. And Kurt had felt the same way about their son the moment she'd shared the news about the pregnancy with him.

"I understand," she responded supportively. But she also knew exactly what Eryn was going through. It wasn't an easy decision, even if she could never regret giving birth to Liam. They didn't have the most ideal relationship now, but it hadn't always been that way. Not to mention her life wouldn't have been the same without him.

"I'll let you know about her decision," he promised and Diane was grateful to be involved.

"Thank you," she replied softly. And then she noticed that Liam's facial expression changed. She had a feeling he wasn't quite done yet.

"There's something else I'd like to talk to you about, if you don't mind," he cleared his throat and Diane began to feel uneasy.

"Of course," she encouraged him, trying not to give away her state of mind.

"Dad told me you're working together again," Liam stated and she really wasn't sure where he was going with this.

"He just helped me on a case," she explained, trying to point out that it really wasn't a big deal.

"Will there be more?" he asked, genuinely concerned, but she didn't really understand why.

"I'm not sure," she admitted. She hadn't made up her mind yet. She would probably wait with this decision until after their lunch together.

"I just hope you two know what you are doing," he noted, standing her gaze. And Diane finally understood where he was coming from. He simply wasn't used to them interacting, and it confused him enough to confront her. She didn't want him to feel that way though.

"We're trying to establish a work relationship that would be beneficial for both of us. That's all," she pointed out firmly. Obviously she couldn't tell what was in Kurt's head, but so far she didn't see any harm in them reconnecting.

"Okay, that sounds reasonable," he accepted her explanation, and she hoped she was really able to convince him he had nothing to worry about.

"But let's talk about you. If I can help with anything, please let me know," she offered. She was aware that he couldn't always count on her in the past, but she was willing to keep this promise.

"I will, thank you, mom," he responded, and she could only hope he would continue to involve her in his life. Especially if he was to become a father.

Diane couldn't help thinking of her father, who hadn't been there for her when she'd told him she was pregnant. He especially hadn't been pleased with Kurt being the father of the baby and it had taken a while until the two men had actually met for the first time. Somehow Kurt's mother had been more accepting, like Diane's mother would probably have been too, if she had been alive at that time. Diane wanted to be supportive of Liam and respect all of his choices.

Looking at her grown up son now she knew that thanks to Kurt's support she'd made the best decision of her life back then when she'd decided to keep their baby. Even if she hadn't always been the best mother, she loved Liam more than anyone in the world. She was still trying to make up for failing him in the past, she just wished she hadn't failed him so often.

###

 _It took her some sleepless nights, weighing in the pros and cons to make her final decision. She had envisioned a life for herself when she'd finished law school, that didn't necessarily include marriage. The focus was on her career. She wanted to become a partner at a law firm before she would even consider having a serious relationship. She had to rethink all of that now._

 _It was almost too easy with Kurt. He hadn't run away after hearing the news, in fact he'd made it very clear that she could count on him and she appreciated that. He had even proposed marriage and although it hadn't been part of her plan, because of the baby she seriously considered his offer. Maybe having a child didn't mean giving up her plan entirely. Maybe she could have both, a family and a career. It was possible and she had always believed in herself._

 _One evening before she got into the shower she found herself checking out her belly in the mirror. She placed a hand over it and thought of the new life that was forming inside her. She wasn't religious, but she believed that things happened for a reason. She thought of this baby as a message that there were other important things in the world. And for a woman, becoming a mother was probably the most important of all._

 _The next day in her lunch break she walked by a park and observed the kids playing there. Their giggles filled her head and she completely lost track of time. She only realized later that she'd been smiling all along. This was a type of happiness she hadn't experienced before. And by the time she got home that day she was almost certain about her decision._

 _There was only one thing left to think about, if she loved Kurt enough to marry him so they would do the whole thing together._

###

She had wanted to fulfill her promise to Kurt and call him even before she'd heard from their son, but now she had even more reason to finally do it. He was the only person she could talk to about their son's announcement. She was also surprised that Kurt had mentioned her to Liam on the first place.

It may have taken them over fifteen years, but it seemed like they were finally doing it right. Because of how their marriage had ended, they hadn't been able to make the staying friends after divorce thing work. They had been able to stay civil, but that was all. And it was her fault, she'd hurt him too much. She hoped that his current attitude towards her meant that his wounds had finally healed.

That was why she dared to even send him a jokey gift in return for his help with the case. She couldn't believe her eyes when she'd seen the Palin photo on his desk, even if she also had a photo with Hillary in her office. But Sarah Palin of all the Republicans? His ex-husband had the worst taste, not only in clothes.

Nevertheless she would have lied if she'd said she hadn't enjoyed spending time with him again. They used to work well professionally too when they had been married and it seemed to be the same today. He was simply a great witness, he didn't always talk much, but he said exactly what the jury or the judge wanted to hear.

Maybe it would be smart to hire him for more cases and that was one thing she could have told him during the lunch he'd proposed. And of course they would talk about Liam and possibly becoming grandparents. Somehow this thought filled her heart with joy, even if it was sort of amusing to think of herself as a grandmother. But she understood more than anyone that it wasn't an easy choice for Eryn. The girl was trying to build a career as a business woman, hoping to take over her father's accounting firm someday. His firm was a client of Lockhart/Gardner. It shouldn't matter to Liam, but she was more than pleased with his choice. If they decided to get married and start a family, she would be really happy for them. And she was sure Kurt felt the same way.

She just hoped that they would be luckier than them.

He only answered her call after several rings, she'd almost given up when she finally heard his voice on the other end of the line.

"Hey, sorry I was cooking, had to wash my hands," he explained the wait, not that it was necessary. "Thank you for not hanging up," he added.

She imagined him in his kitchen, where he also used to cook for them when they had spent the weekend on the farm and the picture made her smile.

"Of course," she reassured him and she was already glad that she'd gathered the courage to call. "Liam was here this morning," she told him about their son's visit to ease into their conversation even more.

"Looks like history is repeating itself," he referred to the situation they had also been in in the past.

"Yeah, it's ironic, isn't it?" she pointed out.

"You're too young to be a grandmother though," he complemented her, which was a bit unexpected, but it flattered her a lot.

"I'll be able to handle it," she tried to sound optimistic. This wasn't about her though, it was about Eryn's choice and if she decided to keep this baby, Diane would be proud to be its grandmother. "So I am calling about lunch," she cut to the chase.

"Okay," he replied politely.

"How does Wednesday sound?" She wanted to give herself a few more days to prepare, or change her mind if she saw that fit. She didn't want to play with him, but she wasn't a hundred percent certain it was the best idea. Right now she intended to keep her promise though.

"I can make myself free around lunchtime," he agreed.

"There's a steakhouse near our office building, I'll text you the address. I can meet you there at 1 pm," she suggested, knowing he couldn't say no to a good steak. In fact she probably hadn't had one herself since they had divorced, because it reminded her of him.

"I'll be there," he sounded satisfied with her choice and hopefully appreciated her thoughtfulness.

"All right, I'll see you on Wednesday," she promised and ended their call.

She only realized after she hung up that she'd been biting her lips. It was the third time she had to phone him this week and she had to realize that it had gotten easier. More natural. If it was really an amicable work relationship they were aiming for, she felt that they were doing things right.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: This chapter is a bit longer, I hope you don't mind. Thank you for everyone who's following the story, especially the guest reviewers I can't reply to._

* * *

 **Chapter Six**

Kurt was almost ready to leave the house, excited about the lunch with Diane in the city, when the loud ringing of his cell phone broke the silence. He immediately felt uneasy, even before he saw the caller ID. He knew there was only one reason for Diane to call him an hour before their appointment, and he was already disappointed.

He almost answered with an "are you calling to cancel?" comment, but manage to hold back. Truth be told this situation was all too familiar to him. Getting a similar call from her used to be a regular thing. He was naturally a patient and understanding man, but she had often taken it too far.

"Hey," he greeted her through the line, trying to push the thoughts about the past to the back of his mind.

"Hey, I'm so glad I could reach you, I only have five minutes," she spoke fast, confirming his suspicion that something kept her busy.

"Is everything okay?" he inquired merely out of politeness. He wasn't really open to her excuses at the moment. In fact her call made him wonder if the lunch was a good idea to begin with. Maybe her cancelling it wasn't such a bad thing. Maybe it was a sign that he should reconsider his offer.

"Yes, but unfortunately I'm stuck in court and I have to cancel our lunch. I'm so sorry Kurt, I feel really bad, but there's nothing I can do." She sounded like she was sorry, but it didn't make him feel any better.

"That's okay, we can do it some other time," he reassured her. He wasn't even upset, he was just very disappointed and wished he'd never asked on the first place.

" _No_ ," she emphasized her disagreement, "we're doing it tonight, if you don't have other plans I mean. I'd love to have dinner with you."

He couldn't believe his ears. _Did she just say that?_ She must have felt really guilty to offer something like that.

"Kurt, are you there?"

He heard her voice again, which reminded him that he was so stunned he even forgot to reply.

"I am, and I don't have plans, so dinner sounds lovely," he admitted. He didn't want to sound too enthusiastic, but he got what he wanted after all and he didn't even have to ask. For once Diane being busy worked for his advantage.

"I'm glad. How about eight? Same place?" she suggested.

"Perfect, I'll be there," he promised and they both hung up.

He was grateful that she'd given back his hope, although he was aware that eight pm was still far away. But at least she showed that it was important to her and not only him. If he's lucky he'd only have to wait a few more hours to have her all to himself. It hadn't happened in years. He wasn't quite sure what they were doing, but he really wanted to spend more time with her. And a dinner for two was the best opportunity he could have wished for.

###

 _From the moment Diane had called to tell him she wanted to discuss something important with him after work he was entertaining the hope that she'd made up her mind to keep their baby. But he was trying to prepare for the worst as well, that she might announce to have an abortion after all. And he didn't really have a plan for that option. How would it look to break up with someone because she refused to give birth to their child? Not that they were officially dating. It was still a casual thing, even though he did propose to her the other night._

 _He wasn't really ready for marriage, but for the sake of his future son or daughter he was willing to try and make it work with Diane. She might not have been the best candidate, and his mother would surely tell him that once it came to an introduction. But Diane was the mother of his future child, a woman he loved spending time with. If they would actually spend the rest of their lives together might be decided soon._

 _So when Diane opened the door to her apartment with a smile on her face, he had a feeling the little box in his inner pocket wouldn't be staying there much longer._

 _There was a gift bag on the kitchen table and he eyed it curiously. Then his gaze stopped on Diane's face again, she was still smiling._

" _It's for our baby, I've decided to keep it," she announced and pulled out a tiny pair of white socks from the small bag, while the smile widened on her face. She seemed happy._

 _"Are you serious? Are you sure you won't change your mind about it?" he wanted to be happy as well, but her announcement was too good to be true. He had to make sure it was her final decision._

 _"I'm sure. I didn't plan this baby, but now that it's here, I think I want it," she declared confidently and finally managed to convince him._

 _"You have no idea how happy this makes me," he finally let go of his fears and hugged her, not too tight though, he was already thinking of their baby._

 _"I don't want to do this without you though," she whispered in his ears and when he looked into her eyes she saw the insecurity in them. And at that moment he vowed to do everything in his power so she would never have to feel that way again._

 _"You don't have to, I'm here. I meant what I said the other night. And my proposal still stands," he reminded her, mainly to test her reaction. He would only reveal the ring if he was certain of her positive answer._

 _"Do you think we should get married?" she asked, and from her tone he figured she already considered his marriage proposal too. He felt like he had nothing to lose anymore._

 _"I know I didn't do it right the first time, that's why I prepared," he explained and pulled out the box with the ring from his inner pocket. He'd sold his grandmother's ring to buy one that he thought was more Diane's taste. The white gold band centered by a small diamond made her eyes widen._

" _Diane Lockhart, will you do the honor of marrying me?" he popped the question in a formal way this time. And even though he wasn't on his knees, the moment was still special and he was able to see how tears filled her eyes at his gesture._

 _"Yes," she gave him the answer he wanted to hear so badly. And when he put the perfectly fit ring on her finger he felt like the happiest man in the whole world._

 _###_

Probably because of Liam's situation, the night of their engagement with Diane was often on Kurt's mind those days. Everything had seemed so simple back then. He'd wanted to believe in happily ever after. But he couldn't blame Liam for being cautious. It really wasn't an easy decision to make. And despite what happened he still believed he'd made the right one. The night he'd popped the question in the right way was still one of his happiest memories of the two of them.

He was in a really good mood as he was driving into town that night to meet her. Diane had texted him to confirm that she would be there at eight, like she'd promised, so he had no doubt that it was really happening this time. Since it was dinner, he decided to put on a suit instead of jeans, aiming for a more festive look. He knew that she'd appreciate it, although he wasn't sure why he was trying to please her now that he didn't have to anymore.

He arrived at the restaurant a few minutes early, so he sat down at an empty table on his own. Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long to spot her at the entrance. She was right on time and the smile they shared confirmed that they were both happy to see each other. She took her coat off to place it on the rack near their table, revealing the grey dress underneath. It hugged her figure perfectly and he forgot his eyes on her back until she turned in his direction again. She still had the most amazing figure, which made it hard for him to hide his appreciation.

"You dressed out for me," she noted with a smile and all of a sudden he felt a bit stupid. Of course he'd done it for her to notice, but now that she did he was embarrassed.

"Guess I did," he mumbled, shifting his gaze on the empty plate in front of him.

"Good evening, may I take your orders?" the young waitress saved the moment for him and they quickly ordered drinks before they hid behind their menus to choose their dinner.

Diane only ordered a small steak with salad, but he was hungry, so he chose the big portion with fries.

"I don't even remember when was the last time I had steak," she admitted, lifting her wine glass the waitress had just placed on their table.

"It was time then," he pointed out and grabbed his beer.

"Cheers," she clinked her glass to his before she tasted the red liquid and he had to admit that so far things seemed to be going well.

"I think we should get the business talk over with before our dinner comes," she suggested.

"Sure," he agreed. He really liked her attitude.

"I discussed it with my business partner and our firm would love to work with you again on future cases."

"I'm at your service," he responded with a satisfied smile. It wasn't that hard to convince her after all.

"Thank you."

"And what does it feel like? Having your own firm?"

He was well aware that it had been her dream, one she'd wished for so badly that their marriage ended up being the sacrifice. He at least wanted to know if it was worth it for her, although he wouldn't have dared to ask it so openly, and he didn't want to offend her either.

"Challenging," she admitted. "Our third partner just left with most of his clients, we haven't found a way to compensate that yet."

"I'm sure you have a plan," he declared. Knowing her mind was always one step ahead.

"Yeah, we need to find a third partner, with a client list. Otherwise Will and I might kill each other," she said with a chuckle, so he didn't take it too seriously.

"Is it that bad?"

He remembered Diane telling him and Liam about her new partner three years ago. She hadn't been too excited about working together with someone so young and unfit for the task as she had put it. But he figured they would have gotten used to each other by now.

"I was exaggerating, but we do need a referee sometimes. He's a good guy though," she added with a smile.

"I'm glad to hear that," he responded contently.

He really hoped she at least had a work 'marriage' that made her happy. He wished he had been able to fulfil that task during their marriage, but what he could offer had never been enough for her.

The waitress appeared with their dinner and for a few minutes they were just eating silently. Kurt wondered if it should be him to offer a subject this time, but Diane was again faster.

"Have you heard from Liam?" she asked about their son. He could have thought of bringing him up too.

"Not since the weekend. I hope to hear from him soon, and that Eryn will make the right decision," he clarified. He had no reason to hide his opinion, Diane knew him well enough.

"That she will keep the baby?" Her question proved that indeed she did.

"Of course. It would be our grandchild."

In the last days he found himself imagining himself and Diane looking after their granddaughter. He really wished for it to be a girl, just as pretty as her grandmother. He hoped that Diane understood the meaning behind his smile.

"I know, but it's not our decision." She pulled him down from his temporary high.

He hated that he didn't have a say in this, just as much as he'd hated waiting for Diane to make up her mind back then. But at least she'd made the right decision.

"I know. Have you ever regretted your decision?" he inquired, just to hear her confirm what he knew in his heart.

"No, I could never regret that one," she reassured him and after a few seconds of silence she added, "Do you think he'll propose to her?"

Kurt assumed that due to this situation with their son she was taking a few trips down memory lane too, just like him.

"He might, he isn't sure yet," he explained.

"Did you suggest him to?" she asked, although he wasn't sure she didn't know the answer.

"No, he needs to make this decision on his own," he reassured her that he had no intention to talk him into anything. He was old enough to know what was best for him.

Diane's eyes were pacing his face, until she shifted them on what was left of her dinner. She looked up again and her lips parted as if she wanted to say something, but then she hid her gaze again and no word left her mouth. He wanted to know what was left unsaid, so he waited patiently for her to make up her mind, gather her courage or whatever it was she needed.

"Do you regret marrying me?"

He heard her words and now he understood why it had been hard to form them. She seemed insecure, and she didn't allow most people to see her like that, but she had nothing to hide from him.

"No. I could never regret that," he declared seriously.

He didn't have to think about the answer. Even if their marriage hadn't been a happily ever after, he would have done the same knowing that. It had been the responsible thing to do. And even though the bad times overshadowed the good ones in his memory, he still remembered their happy years like it had been yesterday. And he had no doubt that she remembered too.

He considered asking her the same question, but he was a bit hesitant, because he wasn't sure of her answer. And he didn't want this night to be ruined like the last time they'd had dinner together.

###

 _It was Liam's 25th birthday and it had been Kurt who suggested Diane that they put their differences aside for one night for Liam's sake and celebrate with a dinner together. Liam was more than surprised to find both his parents at the same table and he really appreciated the gesture. They spent a lovely dinner together, with cake and presents._

 _It almost felt like old times when Liam had been little, when their marriage had still been working. Although Kurt couldn't shake away the thought that if things had worked out between them, they could have celebrated their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary around that time. But he didn't let this realization ruin his mood._

 _He had a great time in Diane's company after barely seeing her in the previous years, except for Liam's graduation. And he made the mistake of believing that all of a sudden everything was all right. The dinner brought back all those feelings he hadn't felt in a long time, due to hurt, anger and disappointment._

 _He'd often wondered why he hadn't been able to make any relationship work since the divorce, even though he tried. He was desperately looking for a chance to find happiness again and he had to realize that maybe it was his fault that he couldn't. Because he was still in love with his ex-wife._

" _Tonight was wonderful," he told her when he stopped the car at her apartment to drop her off._

" _It was a nice idea, I had fun," she admitted with a smile._

 _A little voice in his head was telling him that the intensity of her feelings couldn't be compared to his, but he ignored it. He fooled himself with the thought that their dinner didn't leave her unattached either._

 _She was sitting right next to him, so close, more gorgeous than ever. And yet he knew that a minute later she'd be gone and he wouldn't have an excuse to see her again for a long time. He would have done anything to keep her there just a little longer._

" _Do you think we made a mistake, getting divorced?" he asked, without thinking it through. He was on a high that night and desperately wanted to hear that she was having similar feelings._

 _She took her time to answer, but when he heard her say 'no', he was almost certain the hesitation was due to that she didn't mean to hurt his feelings. Yet she still did. Once again she hurt him, unintentionally though. He made the mistake expecting something that wasn't there. She had clearly closed that door a long time ago, and it would have been pointless for him to keep knocking, because she wouldn't let him in._

" _Did I say something wrong?"_

 _His feelings were probably written on his face, that's how she noticed. And all he wanted to do was hide._

" _No, that's okay. I think we should call it a night," he suggested, knowing she probably wouldn't protest. That was obviously what she wanted._

" _Thank you for the ride," she said politely before opening the door of his car._

" _Of course," he mumbled._

 _And just like that he let her walk out of his life again._


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

Diane had been full of doubts about the dinner with Kurt she'd suggested rather carelessly as an alternative to their lunch. She hadn't really thought it through, but she'd been aware that cancelling without offering something to make up for it hadn't been an option. She couldn't have done that to him now that he had taken the first step in her direction.

She still wasn't quite sure what his intentions were though. It couldn't have only been about work. But either way she wouldn't oppose a friendly relationship with him. Enough time had passed since their divorce for them to be able to accomplish that. And what could be a better occasion than the birth of their grandchild?

By dinnertime she had been able to convince herself that this night would be nothing special, just some pleasant conversation over great food. And for the most part of the evening that was the case. Until she asked the question she probably shouldn't have.

It wasn't supposed to be about them, that was the last thing she wanted, yet she still asked if he regretted marrying her. She blamed it on the wine and on that they seemed to be at ease with each other so she felt more comfortable bringing up this topic, but only until the words were out, because she quickly realized it wasn't smart to go there, despite his clear answer that he could never regret it.

And she was already prepared to answer the same, but the question didn't come right away. She was wondering why he was holding back, maybe he wasn't sure in her answer. And she didn't blame him for that. Back then Kurt had made a commitment to her that he had always honored, he had been patient and understanding with her and most importantly forgiving. Until it just hadn't been possible anymore, because she'd gone too far.

Yet he was there again, and it could only have meant one thing, that somehow he managed to forgive her. Nevertheless she didn't want for them to talk about the past just yet, at least not in details. It was too early for that. But since she already asked and he answered, she figured she had to say it too, even if he wouldn't voice the question.

"I could never regret marrying you either," she reassured him and he seemed happy about it and grateful that she answered on her own.

She could have said so much more. That she couldn't have asked for a better husband, that she knew the divorce had been her fault. She wasn't even sure if she ever truly apologized to him for ruining what they had. But the right time might come for that too.

She hadn't counted with having this opportunity again. Especially not after their dinner three years ago which had been the last time they had met. He had also asked her something back then, if she'd thought they had made a mistake getting divorced. And she had really been sure about her answer, even assumed he would have answered the same. Because divorcing him had been the solution, she had thought that setting him free had been the right thing to do, since she hadn't been able to appreciate him enough. She had truly hoped some other woman would. Yet he'd seemed disappointed in her answer and that left her with conflicted thoughts.

She had wondered if his reaction had meant that he'd thought the opposite. She couldn't imagine him regretting the divorce, not after the way she'd treated him. And no apology would be enough to change that. But he had still come back and she really wanted to know the reason. But that was another question she decided not to ask just yet. The right time would come.

"Will you call me when you hear from Liam?" she quickly changed the subject to their previous one. Normally she would wait for her son to call, but she preferred to know this news right away.

"Of course," he promised. "And you call me if your firm needs anything," he added.

"I will," she responded.

She was kind of relieved he didn't suggest that they meet again. Maybe it really was just about work and their son like she hoped. She was certain Liam would be pleased about this development too. He needed to know he was able to count on both his parents, especially if he became a father. He needed to know he didn't have to face this responsibility without them.

Diane would have given anything for her father to offer his support when she'd told him about her pregnancy. But he'd had the complete opposite reaction. That had been one of the most disappointing days in her life she hadn't been able to forget ever since.

o-o-o

 _She slammed the front door of her apartment and threw her car keys along with her purse on the ground. She was probably more hurt than angry, but this was a way to get out her frustration now that she was in the privacy of her own home._

" _Diane? Is everything okay?"_

 _Kurt's voice startled her. It had_ _been a week, but she still wasn't used to having him there when she got home at the end of a day. But it had been a decision they had made together. He wanted to be there for her and the baby and she agreed for him to move in with her. They would get married soon anyway. And right now she was glad they only talked about a quick wedding in the courthouse, because she wasn't sure there would be anyone to walk her down the aisle._

" _Not really," she admitted and her anger quickly turned into self-pity that resulted in something she wasn't used to doing. But this pregnancy played with her emotions in a strange way._

" _What happened?" Kurt was already right there next to her and she buried her face with the tears in his shirt. She was pathetic, but she wasn't able to control herself in this state._

" _It's my dad. I decided to tell him he's going to be a grandfather, let's just say he isn't too thrilled about the idea."_

 _She hadn't expected her father to be simply happy, she knew he'd have concerns, but he had been straight out against her plans and that hurt. He had declared that she was making a mistake and if she carried through with it she shouldn't count on his support. He'd even said Diane's mother would have been disappointed in her too, because that hadn't been how she'd raised her and that had been what hurt the most. Because Diane was sure her mother would have been happy about a grandchild, regardless of the father's political views and whether or not it was conceived in marriage. Her father never even met Kurt or knew anything about him, it had been the first time she'd mentioned him to her dad and he was already so judgmental._

" _You should have told me you were planning to tell him, I would have gone with you." She loved that he was so supportive, but she had been smart not to take Kurt to witness that conversation._

" _This is exactly why I wanted to do it on my own, because his reaction was unpredictable." She was able to stop her reckless tears and distanced herself from him._

" _Let me guess he doesn't like that I'm a Republican." He concluded._

" _Yeah, but that's just part of it. He also doesn't like that you got me pregnant and want to marry me." She wasn't quite sure her dad's reaction would have been any different if Kurt had been a Democrat. Maybe showing up at his doorstep with such news hadn't been smart. It might have been too much for him at once._

" _So I assume we shouldn't count on him for the wedding?" Kurt's words brought tears to her eyes again. She loved her father and always took his support for granted. She couldn't imagine getting married without him being there._

" _He was so cruel. I'm his only daughter for god's sake. And it's his grandchild." She wanted to hope that her dad just needed time to process the news and he would come around. Not that anything could ever erase the memory of their heated conversation earlier._

" _I'm really sorry." This time it was Kurt who initiated the hug, offering a shoulder to cry on. "I understand that you're upset, but I'm sure he will change his mind. It was probably just too much for him," he voiced the same thoughts she had, but wasn't able to believe in right now. "Next time let me go with you and we can talk face to face."_

" _I don't really feel like visiting him again anytime soon," she admitted. She felt like her father had to be the one taking the next step._

" _I understand. Whenever you're ready. If it's any consolation my mother was happy about the news and she's looking forward to meeting you," Kurt revealed and even though Diane wasn't sure she was ready to meet her future mother-in-law just yet, it was a consolation that there was someone they could count on._

" _She was?" She tried to force an appreciative smile on her face as she was looking at him again._

" _Yes, she already started rearranging a room for the baby." That reply didn't actually help to make her feel better though. That was clearly going too fast._

" _But you told her we're going to live here, right?" It was one thing she'd insisted on, that they had to stay in Chicago and he had agreed._

" _I did, but we could spend some time there after the baby is born. You obviously won't be working for a while and it's quiet there and she can help you with the baby." He listed a bunch of acceptable reasons, but she felt like her head was already spinning._

" _Can we please not talk about that right now?" She didn't want to seem ungrateful, but this day had already given her a lot to think about, she didn't want to add more to that._

" _I'm sorry. Are you hungry? I made dinner." He quickly changed the subject and she was grateful, but also surprised._

" _You did what? You can cook?" Somehow her future husband had forgotten to share this important information about himself with her so far._

" _Yeah, haven't I mentioned it before?" His grin suggested that he was well aware of the answer. And he couldn't have picked a better day to surprise her with it._

" _I don't think so. Good to know at least one of us knows his way around the kitchen," she chuckled. She had already made it clear to him that cooking wasn't one of her talents. "So what's for dinner?"_

 _She pulled him towards the kitchen hoping the rest of the night would keep her mind off the things she didn't want to think about._

o-o-o

Only a few days had passed since their dinner and Diane hadn't heard either from Kurt or Liam about the baby. She had considered calling Kurt to ask about their son, but in the end she ended up calling him for a different reason. It turned out they needed a ballistics expert because they had to file a lawsuit against Cook County for the wrongful death of their client's husband. He'd offered to help the FBI to catch some corrupt cops he had worked with. But then he was shot and killed during their next deployment. And Kurt agreed to conduct an experiment that would determine whether or not the ballistics evidence was on Lockhart/Gardner's side.

She went to his farm again and on the way their dinner was more on her mind than the case itself. It had been weird not hearing from him since, but she'd also noticed that he'd been happy about her call even if it had been work related. Unlike before her last visit, now she felt a slight excitement nearing the house she'd spent quite some time in with him in the past. With him and their son. Maybe if she had listened to him and agreed for them to move out there after his mother's death things would have turned out differently. Not that it made any sense to dwell on the past anymore.

Kurt seemed happy to see her and she also couldn't miss that he checked her out. She was wearing a more leisure outfit this time and his gaze reminded her that for some reason he'd always preferred these on her. While she did prefer him in a suit, that's why he had been able to surprise her at their dinner. She didn't exactly dress up like that to please him, but she didn't mind if she did. His admiration flattered her, especially after all these years, because she hadn't gotten younger.

During the experiment he thoroughly explained everything to her and patiently answered all her questions. Once he even asked if she was all right after firing a few gunshots. She appreciated the attentiveness.

There was also a rather embarrassing moment when she almost stumbled walking down the stairs behind him. She should have paid attention to her steps, since the space among the wooden boards was rather large. But she was too focused on what he had to say. She barely uttered an 'ouch', his hands were already on her arms giving her support to gain back her balance.

"Thank you," she responded gratefully, trying to avoid his gaze.

His touch somehow felt out of place, but she couldn't just shake it off even though it took him a while to let go. They were too close to each other this way and it was uncomfortable because she didn't know how to handle it. She hadn't felt his touch in a long time.

"Careful," he warned her with a smile before he finally pulled his hands away. And she could swear she felt her skin burn underneath her jacket. She even decided to take it off and when he expressed his worry that she might get cold she silenced him with an eye roll. But deep down, it felt good to know he cared.

Unfortunately his findings turned out to be disappointing, but he only revealed this after he'd finished the experiment.

"And then why did I have to come out here?" She tried to sound like she was teasing him, although despite the quite pleasant time they'd had she was a bit annoyed now. He could have just told her this on the phone.

"Your firm asked me to examine the evidence," he reminded her calmly.

He just wanted to be helpful, so she immediately regretted making him feel like he was wasting her time. She liked that she was able to count on him.

"You could have said no," she noted with a smile. It crossed her mind that he just wanted to see her, but she quickly pushed that thought away. Even if she didn't really mind seeing him either.

"I didn't want to, since I was the one who offered you can call me anytime. I wanted you to see it with your own eyes. I promise I won't bill you for it," he pointed out and she tried to show that she was indeed grateful.

"I appreciate that." She simply couldn't help it, her mind was already racing to find the next step, since the ballistics evidence clearly wasn't on their side.

"But I also need to tell you that I was approached by the State's Attorney's Office," he revealed and suddenly things fell back to their place again.

"To argue against our lawsuit?" she concluded and he nodded.

"Yes, but I declined," he admitted to her surprise.

"Why?" she asked, she really hoped it wasn't because of her. "You have the evidence, you should do it. You know I wouldn't hesitate to argue against you," she added hoping he wouldn't pass on such a challenge.

"I know," he grinned for a second, "but I thought it might look weird to be on opposite sides, since we just started getting along again. I wouldn't want to ruin that," he confessed and she was barely able to stand his gaze now.

First the never ending touch and now the confession. She'd been trying to piece this puzzle together for a few days. And even though she felt like she was getting closer to the solution she still wasn't quite sure what it was. Nevertheless, she couldn't hide the effect his words had on her, she was pretty sure her eyes already revealed more than she meant to.

"I promise it won't ruin anything," she declared with a smile. That was the last thing she wanted and she wished for him to know that.

"Let me think about it," he responded with an expression that was hard to read. But she was aware she wouldn't be able to figure it all out today. She had to give it some more time. So she pushed all the thoughts and feelings to the back of her mind and continued to focus on what she was there for.

"Okay, so maybe I'll see you on a deposition?" she nudged him. She didn't want him to overthink this. It was just a case after all. And it's not like it was the first time they would be on opposite sides.

"It's possible," he responded and she was wondering if he was able to read her when the ringing of his office phone interfered. "Sorry, I need to get that," he declared.

"That's okay, I'll go get my purse," she said but as soon as he disappeared she grabbed her cell phone and started taking pictures.

The reason why she hoped he wasn't able to read her was because she was already planning how to poke holes into his testimony if he decided to do it. He involuntarily shared information with her during the experiment that she would easily be able to use against him. He must have been aware of that too, but if he would still accept the offer to testify for the other side it was a risk he would have to take. He knew her well enough to count with such a reaction.

It wasn't personal though, she was just doing her job. And she had meant what she'd said, that it wouldn't ruin anything between them. Not if it was up to her. Something had clearly started and she couldn't forgive herself for damaging that. But she didn't really have a choice. Now that she knew the ballistics didn't work for them she had to make sure it wouldn't hurt them too much either. And hopefully Kurt would be able to understand that.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

" _Do you need a minute_ _,_ _Mr. McVeigh?"_

It's been hours, but Diane's words still echoed in his head. To say that the deposition had been humiliating for him would have been an understatement. She hadn't hesitated to argue against him, just like she'd said she would, and she hadn't been reluctant to use all the information he'd shared with her voluntarily during his experiment. He was angry with her, although he had no real reason to feel that way, since she had only been doing her job.

He had more reason to be angry with himself for underestimating her. He should have seen that coming from miles away, but he had been under her spell way too much during her last visit. He couldn't help it. She was still the smartest and most beautiful woman he knew. And her behavior lately gave him hope that she wasn't indifferent towards him either.

Maybe he was a fool for approaching her again, since she'd caused him so much heartache in the past. But truth was, despite all the years that had passed, he hadn't been able to figure out how to live without her. She was nowhere near perfect, she'd hurt him more times than he'd care to admit. She was still the only woman who was ever able to win his heart and part of it still belonged to her.

If it was only a work relationship and a sort of friendship she would be able to offer him, he'd take it. Because it was an excuse to stay near her. Because he needed to be near her. He'd learnt not to push her, to take only what she offered. And he thought the other night, in the steakhouse, they'd actually made a huge progress. And he was looking forward to seeing how things would develop in the near future.

He was busy doing dishes when he heard the doorbell ring. Though he didn't expect any visitors, he quickly checked his dinner that was still cooking in the oven, then went to see who was at the door. He couldn't have been more stunned to find Diane standing on the other side of the peephole. Hidden behind her sunglasses, her elegant clothing suggested that she was coming straight from work.

As he opened the door to her, he couldn't think of any other reason for her to be there than the deposition that had happened in the morning. He never expected her to just show up without a warning though. Not that he would complain that she was there. And if she'd come to apologize or make amends, he would most certainly let her. He couldn't stay angry with her for too long either way. But if she felt guilty, and he figured she was - otherwise she wouldn't be standing there - he would be more than okay with that too. Because that would mean she cared.

"Hey," he greeted her simply. The ball was on her side for now.

"Hey," she responded after taking off her sunglasses and when he was finally able to look into her eyes he saw the remorse in them. He couldn't deny that he liked it. "May I come in?" she inquired.

"Of course," he stepped aside to let her in without giving it much thought. He didn't see the point in making it more difficult for her.

"Are you cooking?" She referred to the smell of the food that already filled the air. He figured that if she grabbed at this neutral subject, it meant she was a bit nervous.

"It's just a pot-roast," he responded humbly, trying to stop his mind from taking a trip down memory lane. He truly missed making dinner for her and he was wondering if she missed his cooking. Knowing the lack of her skills, there was no way she didn't.

"Well we both know your pot-roast is unbeatable," she commented, kind of affirming his suspicion.

"Julia Child might disagree," he noted teasingly, making her chuckle. He couldn't help breaking his mask, she simply had this effect on her. "I'd invite you to eat with me, but it takes at least another hour to finish and I don't suppose you'd want to stay that long." He regretted adding the explanation right after he'd said it out loud. Why couldn't he just ask her to stay for dinner? Then again he originally wanted to show that he was angry with her, but seconds after she'd entered his door he already wanted her to stay.

"I don't think I should," she agreed and he was inwardly cursing at himself for sending her mixed signals. "I'm sorry I showed up like this, I guess I just wanted to make sure there are no hurt feelings because of the deposition."

"It wasn't too pleasant," he admitted, but at the same time he couldn't believe she was really there to apologize. She'd never done that easily in the past, which made him appreciate it even more.

"I figured and I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I wouldn't have done it if I had any other option."

"Yeah, I know," he mumbled. He didn't like being the victim, especially not hers. She'd basically used him, and it wasn't that easy to forgive. Even if her showing up definitely made it harder to keep any grudge.

"I promised that it won't ruin anything between us, and I wanted to make sure it hasn't." She was uncertain and even if it was kind of mean, he decided to use it to get some answers he'd been seeking.

"Why are you really here, Diane?" he switched to a different tone and he could tell that she was baffled.

"What do you mean?" She stared at him confused. She must have noticed the change in his demeanor as well.

"You could have said all this on the phone," he pointed out. This situation was very similar to the one a few days ago, when he'd showed her the experiment while he could have declined the offer to begin with. But he hadn't wanted to miss out on a chance to spend more time with her. Was it the reason for her visit too?

"I thought it would be more meaningful in person," she explained after a short pause. He figured this was the closest to her real answer that she was probably keeping hidden. Or he only hoped she'd come here to see him.

"I appreciate that." He retreated. He got the answer he wanted after all, didn't want to torture her with questions any longer. It wasn't his intention to pick a fight.

"Why did you show up in my office after such a long silence?" It seemed like his question encouraged her to ask something she'd probably meant to ask for a while. He liked that they were talking about the real issues all of a sudden, the case was clearly just an excuse.

"I wanted to see how you were doing." This was the answer he'd prepared for whenever he'd have to explain.

"I'm doing well, thank you." He didn't miss the bitterness in her voice. Maybe it hadn't been the answer she'd been hoping for.

"I can see that," he noted. He wasn't doing well. He was actually lonely. Not that he would admit it to her, but he was dying to know if she was lonely too.

"Maybe working together wasn't the smartest idea," she commented and he wasn't quite sure why she'd come to this conclusion all of a sudden.

"Why?" he voiced his confusion.

"Because of the past," she pointed out, but it didn't make any sense to him.

"We used to be a good team," he reminded her. He really enjoyed working with her again, maybe not today, but it made him happy, even if it was a bit complicated at times.

"I remember," she reassured him. _'Of course she does',_ he thought to himself.

"Are you seeing anyone?" He had no idea where he took the courage to ask the question he'd been meaning to ask ever since he'd walked into her office.

"What does it have to do with anything?" He realized that it didn't, yet he still waited for her answer impatiently.

"You don't have to answer," he gave her a way out, but hoped she wouldn't take it. He just wanted to see clearly.

He'd never expected her to marry again after the divorce, since clearly marriage wasn't for her. At least he wished to believe it had been the reason for their failure. But he had been aware that any man would have felt lucky to date her.

"I'm not seeing anyone," she admitted to his surprise, and he couldn't have been more content with her answer. "Are you?" She threw the ball back to him.

"I'm not," he responded honestly.

"I should go," she declared. He didn't understand why she wanted to run away now. He didn't want to let her though.

"Will you have dinner with me?" It was what he should have asked her to begin with. At least he finally did. It took all his courage, but he was proud of himself.

"Why?" Of course she needed reasons. If only she would stop thinking for a few seconds and just listen to her heart.

"Because you're here. Because you love my pot-roast." He could have given her many more reasons, but hoped this would be enough.

"Okay." She gave in a bit too easily, but he didn't mind.

Instead he quickly offered her a drink and she accepted.

o-o-o

 _It was a Sunday, right after lunch. One of those rare times when she could be convinced to choose resting over working. Not even the pregnancy was able to change her habits. He was constantly worrying about her, about them, although he was aware she wouldn't do anything to harm the baby. She was following the doctor's orders, but went as far as she was allowed. Work still came first, and he could only hope that would change once the baby arrived._

 _It was the first time he prepared a pot-roast for her. And she loved it, just like every meal he'd ever made for her. He could achieve anything with a home cooked meal, even a short break from working on the weekends. After he was done with the dishes he found her sleeping on the living room couch. He had noticed that she was tired, not only today, but most of the time. She still wouldn't admit that she needed more rest._

 _He didn't want to wake her, so he grabbed a book from the shelf then took a seat in an armchair opposite from her. With a smile on his face he began reading._

" _Did I fall asleep?" He heard her voice. He assumed she might have been woken up by the siren of an ambulance that passed by._

" _You did," he responded and put the book down. He approached her and sat down right next to her._

" _I just closed my eyes for a second," she noted._

" _You are exhausted, you should take a nap, lie down for a while," he suggested._

" _I'll be fine," she reassured him and placed her head on his shoulder. He wouldn't have minded if she had fallen asleep again in his arms. "Lunch was delicious, I think this is my favorite. And I'm sure the baby liked it too."_

" _I'm glad, I love cooking for you two." He placed a kiss on the top of her head and his hand on her growing belly. And that's when he felt the first baby kick. It left him speechless._

" _See? I told you. He loved it." She peered up to meet his gaze and they shared a smile._

" _Unbelievable," he was still searching for words. That one tiny kick made him completely emotional. It was the proof that their son or daughter was feeling well._

 _For some reason Diane had long declared that it would be a boy, she claimed that she felt it, so she'd been referring to it as a 'he' ever since. But Kurt still had a tiny hope that it would be a girl. Not because he didn't want a boy, but because he would have loved a beautiful baby girl just as much. Exactly like her mother._

" _Maybe it's time we start thinking of names, decorating his room. What do you think?" she suggested and he couldn't have been happier about it. They didn't talk about their plans as often as he would have liked._

" _Or hers," he added with a smile. "I can't wait." He kissed her gently on the lips._

" _And I promise we will set a wedding date, I just want to wait a little more for dad to come around," she explained._

 _He thought that might have been the reason she'd been putting it off. He'd been hoping to meet his future father-in-law, but the other man obviously didn't feel the same way. But he'd decided to let Diane handle the situation the way she saw fit._

" _I'm not going anywhere," he reassured her and kissed her again to make sure she knew he meant every word._

 _o-o-o_

"Do you remember the first time I made pot-roast for you?" He couldn't help it, he had to ask.

"I do, it was just as delicious," she admitted and he thanked her with a smile. "I also remember I fell asleep on the couch right afterwards," she added.

"You were pregnant," he noted. He loved that she also remembered that day, even though it was a long time ago.

"You still haven't heard from Liam?" He didn't blame her for being impatient, he felt the same way.

"No, maybe I should call him," he proposed. He really hoped their son's silence didn't mean any bad news.

"If you want." She obviously didn't mean to influence him.

"I'm really glad you stayed for dinner," he led their conversation back to them. He wanted to use this opportunity wisely. Who knew when he'd have a chance like this again.

"I'm glad I did too," she agreed.

He felt so lucky. He hadn't thought they would be ever sitting at the same table they used to in the past. She was really close to him, it would have been so easy to place his hand on hers. But he didn't want to ruin their progress.

"We could do it more often. I'd be happy to cook for you," he offered. He didn't mind getting carried away, she stayed willingly after all.

"Kurt, I…." She was rudely interrupted by the ringing of his cell phone. Whoever it was at the other end of the line had the worst timing.

"Maybe it's Liam," he noted, since that possibility was the only reason he stood up from his chair. He wouldn't answer anyone else's call at this moment. "It's him," he informed her and he could tell that she also got excited at the news this phone call could deliver.

"Dad, it's official, I'm going to be a father." Liam's happiness was palpable even through the line and Kurt felt it right away.

"I'm so happy for you, son," Kurt responded and didn't miss the happy expression on Diane's face, who was already standing a few feet away from him. She must have guessed immediately what it was about.

"Thank you, I can't believe it. It feels like a dream," he admitted.

"I can't wait to hug you. This is incredible. Your mother can hardly believe it either," he revealed Diane's presence, he had no reason to hide it after all.

"She's there? Can you put me on speaker for a second?" Liam asked and Kurt was more than happy to oblige.

"He wants to talk to us both," he informed her and her face lit up even more. "You're on speaker," Kurt noted.

"Hello darling," Diane greeted her son happily.

"Mom, dad, I'm honestly the happiest person alive right now," Liam's enthusiasm was a joy to his heart.

"We're truly happy for you, darling," Diane reassured him.

"You and Eryn should come over for lunch on the weekend, we need to celebrate," Kurt proposed. Obviously he meant for Diane to be there too, he hoped that much was clear.

"I'll ask her and get back to you. It means a lot that I could tell both of you at the same time," Liam noted and Kurt knew this was truly a special moment. He was even more glad he'd convinced Diane to stay for dinner.

"You should call if you need anything," Diane offered and Kurt nodded in agreement.

"I will, thank you. I'll talk to you again soon." He hung up, leaving the two of them alone again.

Kurt wanted to do something to express his happiness, he just wasn't sure what would have been appropriate. Would hugging her be going too far? He didn't think so, but he was reluctant to do it anyway.

"We need to celebrate." Her suggestion couldn't have pleased him more.

"I'm sure I have champagne in the basement and I could bake a cake, if you don't mind staying a bit longer."

"Are you kidding? It's our grandchild, there's nowhere else I'd rather be."

Her words made him want to hug her even more, but he was afraid she might change her mind if he did. He didn't want to risk this evening with her. He had no idea what it had in store for them, but he was looking forward to finding out.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

She was aware that she should have left a long time ago, but something made her stay. She'd helped him prepare the cake, which had been a fun time on its own. She used to assist him in the kitchen, she seemed to have forgotten a lot. But he was, as always, patient. And the result was more than worth all the effort they had put into it. It was the best chocolate cake she'd tasted in a long time.

With the cake and the rest of the champagne they settled on the couch in his living room and he put on the fire. She should have run away, but she didn't. Like she'd said there was nowhere else she would rather have been. and no one else she would rather have celebrated this news with.

"What if it will be a girl, can you imagine?" His happiness was written all over his face and it suited him.

"We both know you always wanted a girl," she teased. She remember that he'd kept hoping until the last minute that she had been wrong about the sex of their baby. Not that he loved their son any less because of that.

"That's not true. I wouldn't have minded a girl as well, but that's a different subject," he pointed out something she wished to forget.

"Maybe I shouldn't have been that persistent." She wasn't sure whether another child could have saved their marriage, but they would never know that anymore.

"But that's who you are," he noted with a smile. He'd always tried to accept her the way she was, that's why he had been so forgiving, and he'd proven that again today.

"I'm sorry you missed out on the chance to have a daughter, but maybe you'll have a granddaughter. She will surely be grandpa's favorite." She knew he would love their grandchild probably even more than their son. His big heart was one of his best qualities.

"That goes without saying," he admitted humbly.

"You'll be the best grandfather, the one every grandchild wishes for."

She wasn't sure where this compliment came from, but he seemed to appreciate it. In fact he reached for her hand, raised it to his lips and placed a kiss in her palm. It was a very intimate gesture she didn't quite understand. But as much as it frightened her, it also made her skin burn. Suddenly sitting right next to him didn't seem like the best idea. He wasn't supposed to have that effect on her, nevertheless he did and it unsettled her.

"I'm so glad that you came tonight and that you stayed," he admitted, still holding her hand. She wasn't sure if he noticed, but she didn't pull it back.

"I'm glad I did too," she agreed.

She hadn't been sure what to expect when she'd decided to drive out there. He had been right, she could have just called, but somehow the road led her here instead of her own home and now she knew that it simply had to happen this way, so they could experience this happiness together.

"You should stay the night, it's late and you aren't supposed to drive anymore." His suggestion wasn't really out of the blue. She'd noticed how time was flying by and she wasn't quite sure how much longer she should stay.

"I thought I'd call a cab." She pulled back her hand at this point, because she didn't want him to misunderstand the situation.

"Stay, you know I have enough room." His offer was tempting, but she didn't think it was such a good idea. The intimacy that had been forming between them felt like a sign she couldn't ignore.

"I know, but I'm not sure," she hesitated.

"Once Liam and Eryn will need a baby sitter for our grandchild, you'll have to stay here with us anyway. Especially if it's a girl, I know nothing about girls." His argument was very convincing and she couldn't help but smile in return.

"They aren't that different from boys," she pointed out.

"Excuse me if I don't believe you," he chuckled and she had no doubt what he meant.

She looked into his eyes, as if those could give away his thoughts. She wished to know if it was 'safe' for her to stay. She didn't want him to think more into it. His eyes reassured her that it wasn't the case.

"You're right, it's pointless to call a cab this late. I'll stay." She made the decision she could very well end up regretting the next day, but she didn't want to think about that now. It was the smart thing to do.

"Then how about we open another bottle?" he tempted her with an irrefutable offer.

"Is it really necessary?" Despite the alcohol she'd already consumed she tried to stay reasonable.

"Are we celebrating or what?" he challenged her with a grin.

"We are," she gave in, admitting that he was right.

"I'll be right back."

o-o-o

An hour later she was already sleepy and she blamed it on the champagne. It was almost midnight though, so it was no wonder she could barely keep her eyes open.

"You are tired, maybe we should call it a night," he muttered softly.

She wasn't surprised he noticed, he had always been very attentive. And it didn't help her case that she unintentionally leaned against him a couple of times. They shouldn't have been sitting that close to each other. The last thing she needed was to fall asleep on him, that would be embarrassing to say the least.

"Yeah, unfortunately I can't sleep in tomorrow," she noted, although technically she could still go to work later if she wanted to. Not that it happened too often. She had to set a good example.

"I'll show you to your room then," he offered before he stood up, and she immediately felt colder without the heat of his body.

"Okay. I'll get my spare clothes from the car for tomorrow, but I'll need something to sleep in," she explained while she followed him up the stairs. Fortunately she always had another set of clothes with her, she never knew when they would have to pull an all-nighter at work.

"I'll find you something and a towel." He entered his room and she took a peek inside while he wasn't looking. Like she suspected nothing really changed in there either. "Would a shirt be okay?" he shouted and she startled. Feeling like she was intruding, she stepped back.

"Of course," she responded and had to smile thinking of how often she used to wear his shirts in the past. He probably remembered that too.

"Here you go," he handed her the shirt and a towel. "That will be your room," he pointed at the guest room further down the corridor, "you know where the bathroom is," he added.

"I do, thank you." Her gaze met his and he once again convinced her silently that she was doing the right thing. It wasn't a big deal, he just offered her a room to sleep in.

"Then I'll see you in the morning. Don't leave without saying goodbye," he warned her playfully. He knew she was capable of that too.

"I promise I won't," she reassured him and intended to keep this promise.

"Well then," he paused and for a moment they just stared at each other, "good night," he finished the sentence.

"Good night," she smiled at him, then due to a sudden urge she leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek. It was a lame attempt to return his earlier gesture. But he seemed to appreciate it. And most importantly he didn't seem to think more into it.

o-o-o

After the shower Diane made her bed and got comfortable under the warm sheets. She wasn't feeling sleepy anymore, and she couldn't help wondering how she ended up there, in one of his rooms. She never thought her day would take such a turn. Yet here she was, and staring at the ceiling in the dark she remembered the first night she'd spent in that house many years ago.

o-o-o

 _They were having dinner at Kurt's mom not for the first time. She wanted to get to know Diane better, so they visited her more often than Diane would have liked. But she was the only parent they could count on, so she tried not to show that it was sometimes a burden for her. She was aware that they would need her help once the baby arrived. And her company wasn't really unpleasant either. If she had any fault it was that she loved her son too much and Diane really couldn't blame her for it, because she felt the same way about him._

 _Kurt needed to help his mother with something around the house after dinner, so Diane decided to take a nap. Because of the pregnancy she was always tired and she'd learnt to use every opportunity to lie down. She made Kurt promise to wake her up once he was done. When she woke up later it was already dark outside, she checked the time and it was midnight. They should have left hours ago. She didn't understand why Kurt let her sleep that long._

 _She wanted to go search for him, but the door opened before she could reach it._

" _How come you're awake?" Kurt almost startled at her sight._

" _I just wanted to nap, I didn't plan to spend the night here. You should have woken me up," she scolded him lightly._

" _I didn't have the heart. You were sleeping so peacefully. Would it be too bad if we stayed the night?" His offer sounded odd, because they had never stayed the night on their farm before. They should have made this decision together._

" _You know I need to go to the office in the morning," she reminded him._

" _I know, I'll drive you there of course, but it's late," he pointed out and she knew he was right, but it was his fault after all._

" _Yeah, I know. All right, as long as your mother doesn't mind," she gave in because that sounded like the smart thing to do. It was better than having him drive them back in the middle of the night._

" _She doesn't. She's already gone to sleep." At least that meant she didn't have to bump into her again._

" _Okay, well, I need to shower," she declared._

" _She's prepared towels for us, and hopefully you'll find everything else you need in the bathroom. And I can borrow you one of my shirts for the night," he offered. He'd noticed that she enjoyed wearing them sometimes. They were quite comfortable and they smelled like him._

" _What makes you think I don't want to sleep naked?" she teased him. She never really slept naked and he knew that too._

" _I don't think we'd get too much sleep then," he pointed out._

" _I'm not sure though if your mother would approve," she continued with the teasing and wrapped her arms around his neck._

" _She doesn't need to know about everything," he reassured her before he placed a kiss on her lips._

" _I just hope the walls are thick enough," she chuckled against his lips._

o-o-o

The memory of that night wouldn't let Diane sleep, or maybe it had been the events of this night that kept her awake. She wished she had brought some work from the car too, she couldn't distract herself with anything. In the end she decided to search for a book to read.

She was heading back to her room with two books in her hands when she bumped into Kurt. He was wearing plaid pajamas, and he was barefoot just like her, which made the situation more amusing than uncomfortable at first.

"Is everything okay?" he inquired and she didn't miss how his eyes shifted to her legs. She was only wearing the shirt over her underwear, and to face him like this was a bit awkward. Not to mention she didn't have any makeup on after the shower, she could only imagine how different she looked to him now. Fortunately it was quite dark in the corridor.

"I can't sleep, so I searched for some reading material. Who knew you owned a Hillary bio." She was surprised to find the book on his shelf.

"It must be Liam's," he shrugged, and she couldn't tell if he was speaking the truth. Maybe there was a completely different explanation for the book that had something to do with her. Or probably she just thought too much into it. "Don't you already know that by heart?" he added to tease her.

"It will do. But I got Tolstoy too just in case," she showed him the other one.

"You're all set then," he concluded.

Silence settled on them and she figured it was a sign that she should retire in her room, but she didn't listen to it.

"You couldn't sleep either?" she asked. She didn't want to think that he left his room to look for her. Nevertheless, it was quite unusual to have a chat with him in the middle of the night. They hadn't actually spent a night under the same roof in forever.

"No, it's weird to have someone else in the house," he admitted.

"I can always leave," she offered even though she was aware it wasn't what he'd meant.

"You know I didn't mean it like that," he explained with a smile.

"I know, it's weird for me too. To sleep here. After all this time," she sighed. It might have been the smart decision, but they certainly hadn't counted with the consequences.

"I was thinking of our first night here," he revealed, making her blush. At least it was hopefully dark enough for him not to notice.

"Of course you would remember that. Your mother almost killed me with her looks at the breakfast table," she chuckled at the memory.

"I really thought we weren't that loud." He joined in.

"She must have eavesdropped on purpose, so she can judge us later." It was a rather disturbing experience, which had been hard to get over. And for a while they made sure they wouldn't stay the night there again.

"No one would judge us now," he changed his tone. She could feel his stare even in the dark, and the desire his eyes revealed, one he'd probably kept hidden from her until now, almost frightened her. She should have listened to those signs.

"Are you saying that we…that you would…you're kidding, right?" she babbled because she simply couldn't take his ambiguous offer seriously.

"Not exactly. I mean, neither of us is seeing anyone and we're alone here in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night. You must have noticed that I'm still attracted to you. And if I can't kiss you I'll probably be lying awake thinking about it for the rest of the night."

All his cards were laid down now and the decision was in her hands. She wanted to believe this wasn't why he'd offered her to stay, not that she had protested too vehemently. But probably neither of them had anticipated something like this. She didn't really understand how he could still feel that way about her though, after everything that happened, but it was a question for another time. Right now she had to determine her own wishes.

The way her body reacted to his words was undeniable, she actually felt her skin burning for his touch and her lips craving his kiss. She knew that she couldn't walk away now even if she wanted to, since her body was already leaning towards him as if he was a magnet. She placed her free hand on his chest and breathed in his scent. He was still using the same shower gel, which brought back memories again. _Damn him and his attachment to things._ He didn't make it easy for her. Although she assumed he must have felt the same way about her perfume.

She was aware that he didn't need words from her anymore, he just needed her to take the next step and he gave her enough time.

She moved her lips closer to his and once they were only inches away she got rid of her hesitation. She wanted to kiss him, so that was what she did. She pressed her lips against his to taste him, and once she made sure he tasted the same way too she got braver, giving him a silent go.

She didn't know exactly how much she craved his kiss until that moment and his eagerness proved the same about him. As their tongues got comfortable with each other leaving them almost breathless, their hands pulled the other's body even closer.

The books she'd meant to borrow landed on the ground with a loud bang but neither of them cared. They were too busy discovering each other all over again. He took her in his arms and carried her in his bedroom. It was the same room she'd spent her first night with him in this house doing exactly what they were about to do tonight.

It wasn't too late to change her mind, to tell him to stop, and disappear in her own room, forget this ever happened. But she was too weak to resist him. He was kissing her just like he used to and made her feel the passion she hadn't felt with anyone else. There had been other men in her life after him, but he was the only one who made her feel that way. Now that she was there in his arms, she wanted him just as much as he wanted her. Just for tonight.

When he started to unbutton the shirt she was wearing she stopped him.

"Turn off the light," she whispered. He may have showcased her legs and her face without makeup, but she wouldn't let him see her whole body. He hadn't seen her naked in a long time, it would be embarrassing for her if he noticed how much her body had aged throughout the years.

When he tried to protest she turned it off herself. It may have been his home, but they would play by her rules.

Her skin may have aged but it was just as receptive to his touch and kisses as ever. This had always worked between them, even when they had been at odds. They knew exactly how to give each other the highest pleasure that would fully satisfy both of them. And time was clearly unable to damage this bond.

And like he'd said, fortunately they were in the middle of nowhere, so they didn't have to hold back. And their passionate reunion couldn't have been more rewarding.


	10. Chapter 10

_A/N: Finally back with an update. I'm sorry it took forever, but I hope the length will make up for it._

* * *

 **Chapter Ten**

He had been lying awake for over an hour now. He first opened his eyes at 6 am and despite being still sleepy he hadn't dared to give into that urge. And the reason for it was the woman who was still peacefully sleeping next to him.

He'd made her promise not to leave without saying goodbye, but it had been before she'd wound up in his bed, and knowing her he wouldn't have been surprised if she hadn't kept the promise under the circumstances. And he wanted to prevent it. He wished to be awake when she would wake up.

She was almost fully covered in sheets, as if she wanted to make sure he wouldn't get a peak of her naked body underneath. He was aware why she'd instructed him to turn off the lights, it had been many years since he'd been allowed to admire her natural beauty. Not that he cared about that she aged, in fact he was convinced that she only got sexier and more beautiful.

He especially loved the change in her hair, it got a lot blonder and he thought it suited her perfectly. And when the urge of touching her took over him, he began to caress the silky locks, let his fingers slide between them carefully, making sure not to wake her. And with that touch the memories of their night flooded his mind again.

What had happened between them excited and confused him at the same time. This had been his wish after all, but he wasn't really sure it was also true for Diane. There had been no question that she'd wanted it last night. Only a few hours ago she had been kissing him with such passion that left no doubt about her desires. He only had to close his eyes to still feel the touch of her lips and hands on his body. She may have seemed more reserved than he'd remembered her to be, but the pleasure she caused him was incomparable to any other woman he'd been with. For him, she was still _the one_.

He rarely wished for time to stop, but this was one of those special moments. Simply because he knew once she woke up the magic would be all over and reality would kick in. She would just leave like she had left him before and he might end up regretting he had gathered the courage to walk back into her life again.

And yet he still couldn't help loving her. He missed touching her, kissing her, sleeping in her arms and watching her sleep in the early morning. Even though it's been years since they had last spent the night together it still felt like home.

When another half hour passed without Diane giving any sign of wanting to wake up he decided to leave the room and prepare coffee and breakfast for them. Maybe this way he would be able to make her stay.

o-o-o

 _Kurt was busy in the kitchen on an early Saturday morning to surprise his pregnant fiancé and future son or daughter with a nutritious breakfast. With bacon, ham, eggs, cheese, toast, milk, orange juice, tea, coffee, the breakfast table was filling up nicely when he_ _heard the opening of a door, which meant that Diane was already awake._

" _What are you doing up? I wanted to surprise you." He wasn't happy that she got out of bed before he was able to take the breakfast to her like he'd planned._

" _I was hungry," she admitted with a chuckle, "and something smells really good in here." She approached him and gave him a peck on the lips._

" _I was hoping you'd be hungry," he returned her smile, which almost made up for the ruined surprise._

" _Better than being sick for sure," she noted and took a seat at the table. "Which is why I've decided to go to the office today," she added._

" _But it's Saturday," he protested. Her statement managed to disappoint him for the second time that morning. There were so many other things they could have done with their free time. She'd mentioned wanting to decorate the room for the baby, but they hadn't made any progress yet._

" _I know, but I have a deadline next week and I don't work as fast as I used to. Being pregnant is exhausting," she sighed and started to chew on a toast._

" _Can't you work from home though?" He tried to convince her to stay. It was hard enough to spend so little time together during the week. They were going to be a family soon and yet he felt that they had a lot to learn about each other._

" _I can concentrate better at the office you know." She glanced at him apologetically._

" _I thought we could go shopping for the baby," he mentioned, naively hoping he would be able to change her mind._

" _Can we postpone that until next week? After the filing deadline. I'm sorry, it's really important," she added_ _,_ _and even though he understood he couldn't forgive her that easily._

" _Sure," he shrugged and started searching for something in the cupboard, which was only an excuse to hide his disappointment from her. But she must have sensed it because suddenly her arms slipped around him from behind and she slightly pressed her body against his._

" _I'm really sorry. If I can finish early today we can still go shopping in the evening," she offered a compromise._

" _Do you think you can?" He remained skeptical, but he did appreciate her effort._

" _I'll try my best," she promised and placed a kiss on the back of his neck._

 _He closed the cupboard empty handed and turned around to face her. Seeing the remorse on her face he really couldn't stay angry with her for too long._

" _I'll drive you to work and pick you up, you just have to call," he offered._

" _Thank you," she responded with a smile. "And thank you for the breakfast."_

 _o-o-o_

Kurt almost burnt the bacon taking a trip down memory lane. He couldn't believe he was making breakfast for Diane again. Now that she wasn't there next to him he had to pinch himself to believe it was actually true, that she could walk down the stairs any minute and walk out the door. Admittedly his plan was to make her stay, so they could talk about what happened and where they would go from here. He wasn't sure where he wanted them to go, but they needed to talk about it either way.

When everything was ready he considered bringing her the food in bed, but he wasn't sure it was a smart decision. He also didn't want to wake her though, even if the food would get cold fast. While he was trying to make up his mind something unexpected happened, the front door opened and that could only have meant one thing, that his son came to visit.

"Liam?" he shouted and when the boy responded Kurt started to feel a bit awkward in his own house, with his ex-wife, the boy's mother sleeping in his bed upstairs.

"I'm sorry to drop by unannounced, I just thought I needed to see you first thing today," Liam explained as he hugged his father.

"You know you're welcome anytime, and I'm really happy to see you," Kurt reassured him, trying to peak in the direction of the stairs unnoticeably.

"I can see that I'm just in time for breakfast. Mind if I join you? There seems to be enough for two," he noted and Kurt tried hard not to give himself away.

"Sure, take a seat," he offered and tried to think of an excuse to disappear for a while and warn Diane. The last thing they needed was Liam finding out about them spending the night together. There was no need to drag him into it when they didn't even know what was happening.

"Is that mom's car in the driveway?" Liam asked, making Kurt feel even more uneasy. He completely forgot about the car. "Did she take a cab home last night?"

"No, she actually slept in the guestroom," Kurt decided to go with a version of the truth, just in case Diane showed up. And he half expected to hear a lecture from his son on how this wasn't a smart decision.

"I see, so that's why you made breakfast for two," Liam concluded with a smile, to Kurt's biggest surprise. He was way too cool about the subject and Kurt could only think of one reason for his attitude, his happiness over becoming a father, that clearly outshined everything else.

"Yeah, but don't worry, I'll make more, your mom seems to be still asleep anyway," Kurt smiled, relieved that Liam took the news this well.

"I only have twenty minutes, so I hope I get to say hi to her. Or I'll just wake her, I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

Kurt was desperately trying to think of a way to stop the inevitable, while acting normally. He was praying for Diane to wake up and join them before Liam would find her somewhere she wasn't supposed to be.

"She'd surely love to say hi," Kurt responded and sat down at the table, although he was everything but hungry at this moment. "So, you're going to be a father," he changed the subject to gain some time.

"I am, and I'm thinking of proposing to Eryn this weekend. I want to do this right dad," he declared enthusiastically.

"You are doing it right, son," Kurt noted proudly. "I'm so happy for you and for me, because I can't wait to hold my grandchild."

"I can't believe I'm going to be a father, that we are going to be a family."

Liam seemed perfectly ready for the task of his life and Kurt couldn't have been more proud of him.

"You better believe it," Kurt noted with a wide smile.

"How did you propose to mom? I don't think you ever told me that story."

Thanks to the question Kurt was beginning to feel trapped again. He was already sweating and wished to just disappear right away.

"I'm sure we told you all about it when you were younger." He tried to get out of the question, because he didn't remember the exact story they had told Liam when he had been a kid. And they probably never talked about it after the divorce, because it didn't matter anymore.

"I honestly don't remember. Also I'm old enough now to know the truth. Did you only propose to her because of me? You got married not long before I was born after all."

He was a grown-up now, so Kurt couldn't just tell him a fake story and he was well aware of that.

"That's a pretty heavy subject for breakfast, don't you think?" He was stalling, hoping for Diane to show up and save him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to push you. I just think it would help to know more about your experience."

Liam managed to hit a tone Kurt couldn't say no to anymore, so he did his best to gather his thoughts quickly.

"Well, unlike you and Eryn your mom and I hadn't known each other for long before she got pregnant with you. And I wanted to do the honorable thing, and she let me. But as you could see it didn't quite turn out the way it was supposed to. I just hope that you two will be luckier than us."

That was his only fear, that his son would have to experience something similar, since they were so alike. He had no doubt that Liam would be a great father and husband, and he only wished happiness for him.

"I didn't mean to open up old wounds," Liam apologized, not that he needed to.

"It's fine, those wounds have healed by now. Your mom and I are on good terms again and even if we can't undo the past, I still believe that things happen for a reason," Kurt concluded. It had taken him long enough to be able to say this so calmly and he meant every word.

"This breakfast is delicious, mom doesn't know what she's missing," Liam noted.

"Are you two talking about me?" Diane showed up all of a sudden to Kurt's relief. She was already dressed and probably ready to leave, although Kurt really hoped she would join them for breakfast.

"Yeah," Liam admitted with a smile, turning to his mother. "Good morning, I came by for a surprise visit and dad told me you spent the night here."

"In the guest room," Kurt added quickly to warn Diane and hoped Liam didn't read more into his comment.

"We celebrated the news and it got late too fast, I didn't want to drive home anymore. But come here, let me hug you. You have no idea how happy we are for you." Diane hugged their son and Kurt couldn't help smiling at the picture. It's been too long since he had seen mother and son together.

"Thank you. I was just telling dad that I want to propose to Eryn and I hope she will say yes." Liam filled his mother in on his plans.

"I hope she will too," Diane commented, sharing with Kurt a look he didn't quite understand. Even though he was happy to have both of them there, he couldn't help wishing to be able to talk to Diane alone. But this wish seemed impossible for now.

"Was it an easy decision for you? To accept dad's proposal?" Clearly Liam still had a lot of questions and Kurt was certain Diane wasn't prepared for them either.

"I can see that you are having a really deep conversation so early. I haven't even had coffee yet." Diane obviously wished to gain some time and looked at Kurt again, probably for help.

"Sorry, we just never talked about these things. And now that I'm in a similar situation, I'd love to know more." Liam's explanation was quite logical, Kurt just wished they had been able to plan their answers together with Diane.

"I already told him we hadn't known each other long before you got pregnant," Kurt tried to help Diane out and she seemed to appreciate it.

"You weren't exactly planned, that's true, and even though I hadn't known your dad for long I was already sure that I couldn't have asked for a better father for our child. And I was right."

This time Diane didn't look at Kurt, but her words spoke straight to his heart. And for some reason Kurt took her praise as a sign that she didn't regret what happened between them last night.

"I intend to be the best father, just like dad," Liam vowed and they both knew he would keep this promise.

"I know you will." Diane noted with a smile.

"Can you stay for breakfast?" Liam finally asked the question that had been on the tip of Kurt's tongue all this time, but for some reason he was unable to voice it. Maybe because he was afraid she would say no. But she obviously couldn't say no to her son.

"I can definitely stay for a short while."

o-o-o

" _Hey there, stay quiet, you know mommy's sleeping," Kurt warned his son and took away from him the spoon with which he had been hitting his plate_ _,_ _making too much noise._

" _But I want mommy to take me to school today," Liam declared peevishly._

 _He had started pre-school a month ago and most days it was Kurt who took him there, while other kids usually came with their moms_ _,_ _and that wasn't left unnoticed by the very observant boy._

" _She was working until really late last night, I don't have the heart to wake her, but when she puts you to bed tonight you should ask her to go with you tomorrow," Kurt suggested, and wanted to make sure in advance that Diane would say yes to their son's question._

 _Diane did her best to take part in her parental duties, and Kurt appreciated her efforts, but he still felt that she could have done more. It often led to confrontations between them he would have wished to avoid, but he just wanted what was best for Liam. And he was quite certain Diane would thank him someday for the interference._

" _Will she also sing for me?" The boy's eyes lit up at the possibility of a lullaby before bed. Truth be told Diane had a wonderful singing voice and Kurt loved when she sang just as much as Liam._

" _I'm sure she will, you just have to ask," he reassured their son._

" _I love you, daddy." Liam stood up from his little chair and hugged Kurt's leg tightly._

" _I love you too lil' man," Kurt stroke the boy's head then took him into his arms. "You know what? If you finish your breakfast quickly and promise to be quiet, I'll bring you to mommy and you can kiss her goodbye."_

" _But we shouldn't wake her, she needs to sleep," Liam responded wisely._

" _We'll be very quiet," Kurt put his pointing finger in front of his lips and Liam did the same._

o-o-o

Kurt was enjoying this rare occasion that the three of them were together and never wanted the breakfast to end. They talked about the future just as much as the past, although the present was something he wished to discuss too. But he counted with that Diane would probably leave any minute, so they wouldn't have a chance for that talk right now. He tried to catch her gaze several times during the meal, but she was either looking at their son, or her plate, never at him. He suspected that she did it on purpose.

The inevitable moment when she announced that she had to go arrived way too soon and a hint of sadness took over him. Liam joined his mother and they both got up from the table and Kurt unwillingly saw them to the door. He desperately tried to think of a way to hold her back, but the words he should have said didn't want to come out. Instead he watched them walk to their cars.

Mother and son hugged each other and despite his mood Kurt couldn't help smiling at the sight. Diane definitely seemed happy, and he was wondering if the night they had just spent together contributed to her happiness as well.

When the two cars left his driveway he entered the house disappointed despite the lovely time they had shared. And he hated himself for it. But as he was walking towards the kitchen he noticed something on the floor next to the stairs. It was Diane's bag. He figured she must have forgotten about it.

He contemplated whether or not he should call her, she could still easily turn back for it. But before he could decide he heard a car approach the house. And his gut told him that it could only have been her. His heart began pounding in his chest and he was unable to move until he heard the knock on the door.

"Did you forget something?" He opened the door to her with a smile, which was the sign of the happiness he felt that she came back, even if he was aware that she probably wouldn't stay.

"My bag," she responded, looking straight into his eyes this time. And maybe it was only his imagination playing with him, but he could actually see the desire in her eyes again.

"I'll get it for you," he offered and while he walked to the stairs he heard the door close.

"I just wanted to have a moment with you alone, after last night." She basically admitted that she'd left her bag there on purpose and it made him feel even happier.

"We should talk about it," he agreed and placed the bag next to her.

"I know," she nodded and began to bite her lips, giving away that she was nervous. "As much as I'd love to blame it on the champagne, I just can't," she admitted what he had no doubt about.

"I think it happened because we are still attracted to each other," he explained to help her out.

"You could say that," she noted and shifted her eyes on the ground in an attempt to hide them from him.

"I just really hope you don't regret it." He voiced his biggest fear, leaving himself vulnerable.

"Of course not, it was wonderful," she admitted, looking into his eyes again, and it made him really happy.

"It was," he agreed and resisted the urge to take her into his arms again, even though something told him she might not protest.

"But now I need some time to think, I hope that's okay with you," she revealed, what he should have expected. Last night was one of those rare moments when she acted without thinking. It didn't happen often.

"Take your time," he offered, because he didn't want to push her. Mainly because he wasn't sure himself whether what was happening between them was smart.

He didn't want to get hurt again, allow her to break his heart one more time. Even though last night he had been weak and let his desire take over, he knew that he was playing with fire here and he could easily get burnt if he wasn't careful enough. Not that it all mattered when he was fortunate enough to be this close to her.

"I will call you," she promised, " _soon_ ," she added emphasizing the word. And it was enough for him, for now.

"Okay," he nodded and waited for her to reach for her bag or make the next move.

"Thank you," she mumbled and leaned closer to place a kiss on his cheek.

He wished it had been his lips she kissed, but he decided to play by her rules now. He didn't want to be greedy, he already got more than he had hoped for last night. His patience paid off and most likely it was only the beginning.


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N: I just wanted to thank you all for the reviews on the previous chapter, they motivated me to write this one even faster. I really hope you will like it. :)_

 _Special thanks to Ilona for all the help and to Sab for taking the time to beta for me despite her busy schedule. I couldn't write this story without you two. 3_

* * *

 **Chapter Eleven**

It didn't take long for Diane to realize that coming to work that day was rather pointless, simply because her mind was somewhere else. She did her best to focus and pretend to be present, but the truth was she just wished to be alone with her thoughts. She wanted to keep her promise to Kurt, to call him soon, but for that to happen first she needed to see clearly about their night together.

Was it loneliness that drew her back into his arms? Was he really that irresistible to her still? She thought she'd managed to put their past behind her, but he only had to show up in her life again to prove her wrong. She was aware that she would always have certain feelings for him, he was the love of her life after all and the father of her only child. But she wasn't prepared for those feelings to surface in such an unstoppable way.

Maybe he was right and it was only attraction, but she knew herself enough to assume it wasn't the whole truth. If she only wanted to sleep with someone she wouldn't have chosen him, simply because with him it was complicated.

Nevertheless, there was one thing she couldn't deny, that she had the most amazing time with him last night and this morning. Of course Liam's presence at breakfast and his attitude towards her added a lot to it as well. She hadn't counted with them ever being together like a family again, it was simply too good to be true. And she felt even more guilty now for letting it all slip away in the past.

"Diane?" The voice sounded very distant, but forced her to leave her conflicted thoughts behind.

"Diane?" Will repeated her name and she sighed, turning her chair back from the window to face him.

"Yes?" she eyed him slightly annoyed, hoping he had a good enough reason to disturb her chain of thoughts.

"We need to leave for court," he pointed out rather impatiently, reminding her of something she clearly forgot.

"Right, I'm ready." She lied, and stood up to approach him.

"Is everything okay?" Will sounded concerned.

"Yeah, guess what? I'm going to be a grandmother soon," she remembered to share the news with him, and let the happiness she felt show on her face.

It felt really good to tell someone, and after their recent conversation with Will she considered it appropriate. Maybe it would also help their work relationship if they opened more towards each other on a personal level.

"Wow, congratulations," he seemed surprised, but happy and once she got close enough he gave her a quick hug. It was something unexpected, but it also felt natural under the circumstances.

"Thank you, I think I still need time to get used to this idea, but seeing my son's happiness makes it worth," she revealed with a smile.

"If you want me to handle court today, I'd be happy to," he offered, probably sensing she wasn't really there in spirit.

"I'll be fine," she reassured him and grabbed her coat and purse. "Let's go."

"I saw the video of your deposition with McVeigh," he noted as they reached the elevator and she didn't really understand why he brought it up.

"You did?" she inquired, wondering where he was coming from.

"You didn't make it easy for him," he admitted with a smile.

"What can I say? He knows me," she stated and that was all she was willing to share about the subject.

She was glad that Kurt had proven her right, and hadn't been too angry about what had happened the other day in their conference room. She had sensed that he hadn't taken it too well either, but he had appreciated her going there in person to make sure there were no hurt feelings.

If it hadn't been for that deposition, she wouldn't have showed up at his house and then last night would never have happened. But she didn't regret either, nor did she doubt that they would be able to figure this out eventually, even if right now everything seemed very complicated.

o-o-o

 _Diane's pregnancy wasn't a secret anymore in the office, simply because she was unable to do anything to hide it from strangers'_ _eyes. So she had to endure her coworkers staring at her belly regularly, occasionally touching it to feel the baby kick. Diane was copying with the attention as best as she could, but couldn't ignore the voice in her head telling her that most of these people were happy to know she would be away from work soon, so they had one less competitor to worry about._

 _Which is why she insisted that her bosses wouldn't give her a special treatment just because she was expecting a baby. She wanted to prove that she was able to take on as many cases as ever and they could still count on her a hundred percent. Even when sometimes she felt her own body disagree, she refused to listen._

 _Until one day she was forced to do so._

 _She felt that something was out of the ordinary even before she entered the courtroom that afternoon. But she would never have admitted to feel unfit for a battle, especially when it was about cross-examining her fiancé on the stand. Kurt was just doing his job testifying for the prosecution and she was doing hers defending her client. They were both professionals and this was supposed to be just a regular day in court._

 _When she stood up from her seat at the defense table, she almost sat back down straight away, because she felt dizzy. But she found her balance somehow and stepped closer to the podium where Kurt was sitting. She intentionally didn't make eye contact with him, because she didn't want him to notice that something was wrong._

" _Mr. McVeigh, when did the prosecution hire you to testify on this case?" She voiced the first question, when a heatwave flashed through her body and she soon felt drops of sweat running down her forehead._

" _I was brought in three days ago," he responded, while she was still hiding her gaze from him._

" _Wouldn't you call it last minute?" she inquired, trying to resist the urge to run her palm on her sweaty forehead. She didn't want to give anything away, she just needed to focus and it would be all right._

" _No, I had enough time to conduct my experiments," he stated._

" _Your predecessor had been working on this case for weeks," Diane pointed out, when for a second her vision got blurry and she could only hope the fear didn't show on her face. She knew that she really needed to sit back down, except she couldn't, not yet._

" _Objection, Your Honor, that wasn't a question," the prosecutor pointed out the obvious, while Diane was unable to focus anymore._

" _Mr. Higgs is right, Miss Lockhart, you're here to ask questions," the judge pointed out._

" _Yes, Your Honor," Diane responded politely, while she wasn't sure if her cheeks didn't give away already that she was unable to stay standing anymore._

 _She knew that Kurt would understand her from one look, but she was fighting an inner battle_ _to try to put an end to this state. She thought she was stronger than this. But when the ground underneath became shaky she had to give up_ _,_ _and placing both her hands on her belly to protect her baby she finally looked at her fiancé. And a moment later Kurt was already next to her to catch her before she fell and darkness followed._

o-o-o

After more than a day of agonizing over the situation Diane realized she didn't need to figure it all out on her own, or find answers to all the questions. They just needed to start talking about the issues and the answers would eventually come. And Kurt had reassured her that he was willing to talk too, so she was more than happy to keep her promise and call him when she got home from work the next evening.

She didn't exactly know what to tell him, but she wanted to make sure he knew it was important enough to her. And she didn't doubt that he'd be willing to cooperate in order to come to a solution.

"Hey," he greeted her through the line and sounded happy to hear from her, which involuntarily made her smile. She had to admit to herself that it felt really good hearing his voice, she almost regretted not calling him a day earlier.

"Hey, hope I'm calling at a right time," she added politely, not that she had any doubts.

"Always." His answer made her blush. His good mood was audible and she was wondering if it was all because of Liam's news, or was she and their night together part of the reason as well. It had certainly improved her mood, in fact she didn't remember when was the last time she had felt that way.

"I've done a lot of thinking," she voiced a sentence without knowing where it would lead the conversation, but he used to understand her even without words, so she trusted he still had this ability.

"You have been on my mind, too," he admitted, clarifying her statement. She wasn't sure if he was making it easier or harder with his attitude, but she found herself wishing they were talking in person right now. Not that she would be able to vouch for her behavior around him after that _incident._

"Do you think we could meet during the weekend?" she suggested, even though right now the weekend seemed too far away. But she also needed time to get ready and get strong enough to handle his presence smartly. Simply because ending in his arms wasn't a solution, it only complicated what had already been very messy.

"Liam and Eryn are coming over for dinner Saturday night, I was hoping you could join us," he reminded her of his invitation.

"I'd love to," she responded cheerfully, pleased that his offer still stood.

"So maybe before that, we could spend the day together, go for a hike, then you could help me prepare dinner? There would be plenty of time to _talk_ ," he stressed the word and she was grateful.

They seemed to be on the same page and it managed to calm her nerves. Given their history they couldn't let their physical needs take over just like that once again. First they needed to clear the air, understand what was happening between them.

"I like the idea," she admitted. Maybe his place wasn't the most ideal solution after the other night, but they had the most privacy there and they really needed that under the circumstances.

"I know hiking isn't necessarily your thing, but it's perfect for a conversation."

She found it sweet that he remembered, but she figured some fresh air and exercise couldn't hurt. It could help them get their mind off a completely different exercise they shouldn't be engaging in.

"I agree," she reassured him that she was up for it.

"I promise we won't climb any hills," he added with a chuckle.

"I appreciate that." She laughed along. It felt really nice to talk to him so effortlessly. In fact it was the first time their phone conversation was this intimate and she could only think of one reason for that. Sleeping together helped them restore some of the intimacy they used to share and it simply felt natural.

"Thank you for calling," he noted softly.

"I promised I would," she pointed out, although she understood his doubts. She hadn't always been the most reliable person in the course of their marriage.

"I'm glad you did." He sounded very sincere and she found herself wishing for it to be the weekend already.

"See you Saturday then," she promised.

"I'm really looking forward to it," he voiced what she was meaning to mention as well.

"Me too. Good night, Kurt," she finished their conversation still smiling.

"Good night, Diane."

o-o-o

" _How is he doing?" Diane rushed to her son's room as soon as she entered their home, knowing she'd find her husband at Liam's bedside._

" _He's finally fallen asleep after his fever went down," Kurt responded plainly, without turning to her and she didn't fail to notice that._

" _I came as soon as I could," she tried to explain herself and approached the bed where Liam was lying._

 _The three-year-old's face was anything but calm, all his suffering clearly showed. His hair was wet from sweating and his cheeks were red. She almost started crying at his sight and kneeled in front of his bed to get as close as she could. She placed a light kiss on his forehead, careful not to wake him and tried to silence the guilt that had been eating her from the inside for hours now. She was finally home._

" _I need to shower," Kurt stood up and she had no doubt that he was probably very angry with her. But she tried to shake it off._

" _I'll watch him," she declared without looking at him and once Kurt left she took his seat._

" _I'm so sorry," Diane said silently to his son, who couldn't hear her, while the person she should have apologized to as well was also out of earshot._

 _She hated herself for letting both of them down, for not being there for her sick son. She was so close to finally getting the partnership offer at the firm, that she couldn't say no to the name partners at this point. She had to be available anytime, even at her family's expense. And today she simply couldn't get away earlier. And she really didn't blame Kurt for taking offence at that, especially since it wasn't the first time this happened. She could only hope he would understand and forgive her, once again._

 _She was listening to her son's even breathing, secretly wishing for him to open his eyes just for a second, to see that she was there. It wasn't only a selfish wish, she was sure it would make him feel better_ _,_ _too._

" _I can take over while you shower," Kurt offered. He had entered the room without her noticing, so his voice almost startled her._

" _It's fine, I'll take it from here," she promised, glancing at him to check if he was still angry._

" _I'll try to get some sleep then," he declared._

" _You should," she encouraged him, not exactly sure how to apologize. She was aware that she had gone too far this time._

 _Once he exited the room she decided to follow him to at least give it a try._

" _Kurt, I'm really sorry," she said silently, not to wake their son with her voice._

 _Only now that she was facing him did she realize how exhausted he looked, even after the shower, which fueled her guilt even more._

" _I don't doubt that you are, but at some point it's just not enough. He was really sick, Diane, I was scared and you weren't here." He seemed disappointed, and she knew he was rightfully blaming her._

" _I know that there's no excuse for this, I feel very guilty and hate myself for it. I just hope you won't stay angry with me for long," she expressed her wish, even though she was aware of being undeserving._

" _I'm not angry, I'm just glad he's better for now," he noted. His worry about Liam was written all over his face._

" _I'll spend the night at his bedside, it's the least I can do," she volunteered. She needed to do everything she could now that she was there._

" _You need sleep too," he commented and she finally saw on his face that he cared about her as well. She really didn't have an easy day, even if it couldn't be compared to what he had gone through._

" _I'll sleep on the mattress, so I'm there in case he wakes up," she reassured him._

" _Okay, see you in the morning."_

 _He seemed ready to call it a night, but he didn't move and she took it as an encouragement to step closer to him. She wasn't used to going to sleep without kissing him goodnight and she could only hope he wouldn't push her away if she tried to initiate any_ _physical contact._

 _Since he was standing still she opened her arms and hugged him tightly. She found it more appropriate than a kiss under the circumstances. She was aware it might take him a while to forgive her, but it didn't mean she couldn't show her feelings. A hug was the least she could do to help him cope with that awful day he had to get through without her._

" _Thank you for taking care of our boy," she voiced her thoughts, whispering in his ear. She was grateful that he was there for their son, she had no idea what she would have done without him._

 _When she finally felt his arms around her she knew that getting his forgiveness was only a matter of time, all she had to do was earn it. And she silently promised to try harder to be there for both of them from now on._


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: I decided to keep Diane's POV for this chapter, but the next one will be from Kurt's again._

* * *

 **Chapter Twelve**

Diane had been tossing and turning all night because her mind wouldn't give her any peace. She didn't quite understand why the day ahead unsettled her that much when not long ago she had been looking forward to it. But the closer it got the more nervous she became.

Nevertheless, she was relieved to finally get out of bed Saturday morning, since it didn't make much difference that she was in it. She needed to get ready for the day anyway, pack some things and drive out to Kurt's farm. They were supposed to spend the whole day together, but at least she probably wouldn't stay the night this time. If she happened to drink more, she would ask her son if they would drive her home and get her car the next day. Unless Liam and Eryn were planning to stay there too, because then she might consider doing the same.

Of course a lot would depend on their conversation with Kurt, which was most likely the reason for her uneasiness. Mainly because it would include talking about the past and she didn't know what to expect. She was also uncertain how Kurt felt about their night together now that they both had time to think on it. But that was exactly why they needed to talk.

She was planning to leave in the clothes she would use for hiking, a pair of jeans, boots and a trench coat over a pullover. She packed another pair of jeans just in case and a shirt for cooking, while for the dinner she chose a knee length pencil skirt and a blouse. She didn't want to be too elegant, but she aimed for a bit more festive look, it was a celebration after all. She also considered the possibility of having to spend the night there and since she didn't want to borrow one of Kurt's shirts again, she packed her pajamas, although a voice in her head suggested she might consider bringing something sexier, but she ignored it.

When she was ready she got into her car and texted Kurt that she was on her way. Only then did she realize that she forgot about breakfast.

o-o-o

 _As Diane was nearing their office she saw that Aiden, her roommate, was having a conversation with someone in there, but only when she got closer did she recognize_ _the voice of her fiancé._

" _Kurt has been waiting for you," Aiden stepped aside, so Diane could lay eyes on the man who was sitting there in a visitor chair._

" _Hi, what are you doing here?" Diane quickly kissed Kurt's cheek and got behind her desk._

 _She wasn't sure how to act in front of her colleague, but she didn't want to be rude and send him out either. And clearly he wasn't polite enough to offer them some privacy, instead he sat behind his desk, pretending to work, but Diane had no doubt he was listening to every word._

" _After what happened the other day, I just wanted to make sure you have something proper for lunch." Kurt pointed at the plastic bag on the desk Diane hadn't noticed until now._

" _That's really thoughtful of you," Diane thanked him with a smile._

" _I keep telling her to eat, she never listens," Aiden commented, proving that he was indeed paying attention to them._

" _Do I have to leave him in charge or will you promise to take an effort from now on?" Kurt asked chuckling, but she was aware that he really meant it. And she didn't want him to worry._

 _It was irresponsible of her not to pay attention to eating properly, but what had happened in court the other day scared her too. The doctor had informed them that the baby was slightly smaller than it should have been and emphasized how crucial nutrition was for its wellbeing._

" _I promise," she responded truthfully. "And thank you for lunch."_

" _No problem," Kurt smiled. "So what are you waiting for?" he urged her rather impatiently._

" _Are you going to watch me eat?" She began to laugh._

" _Do you want me to leave?" He inquired, making her regret her previous comment._

" _No, please stay," she insisted, glancing in the direction of the man she wished to see leave instead._

" _Since you are already taken care of, I'm going to head out to get my lunch." Aiden finally realized he was the third wheel or he was just simply hungry. Either way, Diane was pleased to see him stand up._

" _Thanks for the talk, and if you don't mind keeping an eye on her…"_

" _Hey," Diane interrupted Kurt quickly. The last thing she needed was Aiden as his chaperone._

" _It's for your own good," Kurt pointed out._

" _I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself and the baby," she argued, even though they both knew it wasn't always true._

" _Then prove it by eating the lunch I brought," Kurt challenged her._

" _I'm on it." Diane grabbed the bag and opened the box. The chicken with the vegetables smelled really good, so she took a bite right away. She only felt it now that she was actually really hungry._

" _I hope you don't mind that I showed up unannounced," Kurt said when they were finally left alone._

" _What are you talking about? I really appreciate what you're doing for me, for us," she added, touching her belly, feeling the baby inside kicking. "I think he's thanking you for the food as well," she smiled._

" _Is she?" Kurt responded grinning. Their fun disagreement about the sex of the baby never stopped amusing her._

" _I don't tell you enough how much I love you." She hoped her confession sounded sincere enough despite the circumstances. She really meant it._

" _I love you too," he responded and she got lost in his gaze for a few seconds._

 _She had this perfect man taking care of her every need and she was able to rely on him fully. She was aware how incredibly lucky she was to have found him. And she had no doubt that he would be a great father to their baby. She had been putting off a decision for way too long, but she finally realized she was ready to take that next step._

" _I think it's time we set a wedding date," she declared and watched as the smile spread on his face. He probably didn't expect to hear that from her now of all times._

" _I'd love that." He reached over to take her hand in his._

 _And his touch reassured her that they were going in the right direction, together._

o-o-o

As Diane rang the doorbell she almost felt ridiculous holding what's left of the doughnuts she had obtained for breakfast on the way. But he loved doughnuts, so naturally she'd bought enough for two. She also brought wine for the dinner, still felt that she didn't contribute enough. Even though there was also a special present hiding in her bag for the parents to be, which only had sentimental value, but she had no doubt Liam and Eryn would appreciate it.

"Hey." Kurt's wide smile gave away that he was very pleased to see her and she could only say the same. She'd had time to calm her mind during the drive and seeing his reaction somehow gave her even more confidence.

"Hi, I've brought doughnuts." She handed the bag to him with a smile, resisting the urge to greet him with a kiss on the cheek. Even though a few days ago it had felt natural to say goodbye to him that way, she somehow didn't think it was a good idea today. She wanted to avoid any physical contact that could endanger their plans to have a conversation first.

"You forgot about breakfast again?" His conclusion sounded like a gentle scolding, while his eyes sparkled, making her blush.

"It still happens," she admitted, appreciating his attentiveness.

"It's good to see you again," he noted, letting her enter the door. "Ready for hiking I see," he added and she turned back towards him, because she assumed he was checking her out and his guilty expression gave him away. Not that she minded. She was aware he always preferred her in jeans.

"Was I ever?" She chuckled as memories flooded her head about the two of them out in nature. Hunting, fishing, hiking, he made her try them all, but despite all his efforts to lure her into the nature, she still preferred doing yoga at home as an exercise.

"I've packed sandwiches for us," he noted and she began to realize the awkward silences were getting longer and longer. It was time to get going.

"Thank you. So, what are we waiting for?"

o-o-o

" _Mommy, I caught a fish, I caught a fish!" The shouting six-year old ran through the front door, right into his mother's arms who lifted him and hugged him tightly._

" _You caught a fish? I'm so proud," she kissed the boy's cheek which was cold from the chilly air outside, but his enthusiasm was like a fire burning inside._

" _Daddy will show you, it's this big." Liam opened both his arms as wide as he could._

" _Are you sure it's that big? That's bigger than you," Diane teased her son, stroking his nose with hers gently._

" _I'm a fisherman, I'm a fisherman!" Liam shouted and Diane had no choice but to put him down to let him run around celebrating his victory. He was too cute for words and as happy as she was watching him, she also felt some sadness that she missed out on this big moment in her son's life._

" _What is it?" Kurt noticed quite fast that Diane's expression changed and touched her chin to make her look right into his eyes._

" _I should have gone fishing with you," she noted with a guilty conscience._

" _But you have a trial, you will join us next time," he shrugged it off. He either really didn't think it was a big deal, or he simply got used to it by now._

" _I keep missing out. I'm not trying hard enough. I'm a bad mother," she concluded and all of a sudden her happiness over her son's achievement changed into guilt and anger._

" _No you aren't. You are a working mother. You are doing the best you can." It was typical of Kurt to defend her even when he should have agreed. He was way too forgiving and she couldn't help wondering when this would backfire. She tried to avoid going too far, and even when she did he always managed to forgive her._

" _I don't think I am. I love him so much," she confessed and rested her eyes on Liam for a while, finding herself smile again. He was the most adorable little boy who brought so much joy in_ _to_ _her life. She could only hope she was able to give some of it back._

" _He knows that you do. And you are welcome to join us on our next fishing trip," he reassured her and folded his arms around her waist._

" _I'll try my best. I love you, Kurt. I don't think I say that enough anymore," she confessed._

 _It was especially important to voice her feelings now that they were in the critical seventh year of their marriage. Sometimes she couldn't believe they even lasted this long. It was mainly thanks to Kurt's forgiving nature and the existence of their son. There had been misunderstandings and fights, but they had always managed to get over the hard times._

" _I love you too," he returned the words and leaned in for a kiss which quickly made her realize how much she was craving it. But the kiss didn't have time to deepen because of the noise coming from the other room._

" _I'm going to get Liam ready for bed and once he's asleep we will continue this right where we left off," she promised, finding it hard to distance herself from him._

" _You'd better hurry," he whispered and only let her go after another gentle but hungry kiss._

o-o-o

After an hour of walking and talking about everything but what they had originally agreed on, they arrived at a resting place with a few benches. They decided to settle on a bench to take a break, catch a breath, grab a bite and finally have the conversation they were here for. The surrounding was ideal for it, because they were completely alone. The silence was only disturbed by the chatter of the birds and the rustling of the leafs on the nearby trees.

Kurt gentlemanly let Diane start the topic, which she didn't mind. It was time to voice some of the questions that had been circling around in her mind in the last weeks, ever since he had been back in her life.

"I'm simply confused about this whole situation," she admitted, "and I think that night only complicated everything." She was scared to look into his eyes at this point, and to cast her inner anxiety she started playing with the zipper of her coat.

Before they slept together she had been able to believe they could simply work together and only be friendly with each other, but she had been proven wrong. There was clearly more between them that had surfaced the other night and she didn't want to see it in his eyes again at this moment.

"I know, maybe you could share your confusions so we can discuss them," he offered patiently and she just had to figure out where to start.

"Remember when I asked why you showed up in my office after all these years?" She referred back to their conversation at his door the same evening and finally gathered the courage to look at him again.

"I said I wanted to see how you were doing," he nodded, and she flashed him a smile remembering how lame his answer sounded back then. He must have known it, too.

"Why this sudden interest now? I thought we put the past behind us," she pointed out, because she really didn't understand. If he only wanted to know how she was doing, he could have just asked their son.

"I thought so too. And I'm sorry but I can't really explain it better. Your partner gave me a chance, _an excuse_ to see you again and I just decided to take it." This explanation definitely sounded more true. At least she now knew that he wasn't really sure what he was doing either, and didn't leave her in the dark on purpose.

"But why? I caused you so much pain in the past, I guess I just don't understand. I wish I didn't question it, but I do. I honestly feel like I'm undeserving of your attention," she admitted, shifting her gaze to the ground, embarrassed. She was completely honest with him, because that was the only way for them to come to a solution.

"Please don't say that." Kurt touched her arm to get her attention and only let go when she looked back at him again.

"But that's how I feel, Kurt. We had an opportunity once, but it didn't work out and I still blame myself for it."

She had known it back then already, that their marriage falling apart had been her fault, but she still hadn't tried enough to save it. She'd thought the divorce had been in Kurt's best interest, she had wanted him to have another chance at happiness with someone else, someone who would have appreciated him more, but it seemed like he hadn't found that person.

"But I don't blame you anymore. Since then I understood that I sort of forced you into something that you weren't cut out for." He was too hard on himself, and she simply couldn't let him take the blame for this.

"You didn't force me into anything. I wouldn't have done it if it hadn't been what I wanted," she reassured him. She had already told him that she didn't regret marrying him, and that was the truth.

"There was simply no place in your life for a family," he stated without sounding hurt and she admired him for how he handled it now compared to then. They both had come a long way since the divorce had put an end to their relationship and weren't the same people anymore.

"I should have made place for it, because I loved you both and I never meant to let either of you down. You have no idea how sorry I am. Even though I know it's too late for that." Maybe it was selfish, but it felt really good to say it out loud. Not to mention she owed him that much. She knew that the regret was written all over her face and he was able to see that she meant every word.

"It's never too late," he noted and to emphasize his words he slowly placed his hand on hers and began to smile.

"Does that mean you've been able to forgive me?" She sought verbal confirmation, standing his gaze and turned her hand to place it in his.

"Yes, it does," he declared and she couldn't believe her ears. Even though he had been acting accordingly, so she guessed that somehow he had been able to forgive her, it was completely different to actually hear it.

"You have no idea what that means to me," she answered with a smile, while she could also feel tears form in her eyes. It was a really special moment. And even though she still felt undeserving she was also very grateful for him.

She lifted their entwined hands to her lips and placed a kiss on the back of his hand.

"I'm really glad we talked about this," Kurt stated, still holding her hand and she didn't want him to let go of this only physical contact between them. It gave her the strength she needed not to break down completely. Long years of suppressed guilt could finally surface today and maybe she would be able to finally start healing.

"Where do we go from here?" she inquired, not meaning to rush anything, just out of mere curiosity. She had no doubt that this day was the start of something new.

"I don't know," he shrugged, smiling. "Where do you want us to go?"

"I don't think I can answer that," she responded with a smile, "but I can say one thing: having you back in my life means a lot to me." There was no use denying the obvious. She hadn't really been happy in a long time and he was already able to change that with his presence.

"In that case I'd really like to stay," he expressed a wish she could only be supportive of, simply because she didn't want to let him go.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

After the long walk they both felt pleasantly tired, yet full of energy to prepare the meal for later, so they took over his kitchen. The plan was to make roast turkey breast with potatoes, green beans and mustard pan sauce, and for dessert a tiramisu cake that was one of Eryn's favorites. They wanted to pamper the soon to be mother so she felt welcome in the family.

Kurt was pleased to see how much Diane had improved her skills in the kitchen and made sure to let her know. Thanks to their cooperation dinner was ready sooner than planned and while she disappeared to get dressed for the evening he was able to take a moment for himself to go over the events of the day and draw some conclusions.

He was relieved that they finally had this talk, that the ghost of the past wouldn't stand between them so strongly anymore. He wanted her to know that he was able to put it behind him, suppress the bad times and reminisce of the good ones. And the reason was that he still loved her, despite the past, with all her flaws, he simply did.

But he wasn't going to let her break his heart again, he decided to play it as smart as he could. The night he had spent with her didn't really fit in with this determination, yet he had no regrets. It reassured him that she was nowhere near indifferent towards him either and that they still had a kind of chemistry he had been unable to find with any other woman after her.

It was a challenge to be around her all day and only be allowed to hold her hand, but he was grateful for their time together and the conversation they had. It was no question that they were going in the right direction even if he hadn't dared to admit to her what was the exact direction he wished for. First he had to make sure they were on the same page. But the fact that she wanted him in her life again already made him happy.

"Sorry it took so long."

Diane entered the living room dressed a bit festively, even though he would have been more than okay with her staying in the jeans; in fact he had a hard time keeping his eyes off her in those. The skirt and the blouse was more of her office look and he really had no reason to complain about it either. She looked downright gorgeous. But the real surprise hit him when she stepped closer to where he was sitting and he spotted the golden rose shaped pin on her blouse.

"I can't believe you've kept this old thing," he noted, not taking his eyes off the shiny object that was all too familiar to him.

"Of course I have, I got it from my husband," she answered and he didn't even try to hide his happiness.

He thought of that rose as the symbol of their love when he'd got it for her many years ago and the fact that she kept it and decided to wear it tonight meant the world to him.

He glanced from the pin to her eyes, then back to the pin and became helpless as the feelings took over. Back then when he had given it to her they had been perfectly happy and for a second it seemed like they were back in time. She shouldn't have come closer to him, but she did, in fact she sat next to him on the couch and he couldn't help himself, he simply had to touch the pin and he could swear he felt her heart beating fast underneath.

And that's when he forgot about wanting to play it smart and without asking for permission like the last time he simply listened to his heart and leaned closer to kiss her.

o-o-o

 _He had been preparing for this special day for weeks and now that it was here he was getting ready with so much excitement. They hadn't had a date night ever since Liam had been born, but they both agreed that their first anniversary was something they had to celebrate._

 _If he was honest to himself at the beginning he hadn't been sure they would make it this far, even though they didn't only love each other but also shared the parental responsibility. But they couldn't have been more different._

 _She was ambitious, while he simply found joy in his work. She loved the city, while his heart was still in the country. She loved dressing out, while he had a hard time putting on anything other than jeans, even on such a special occasion. And these were only some of the many reasons why they probably weren't the best fit. But what mattered was that they were able to overcome the differences and make a life together, and it had been exactly a year today since they had tied the knot for better or worse._

 _When he laid eyes on her in the red mini dress she put on for the occasion he could swear he fell in love with her all over again. He had no doubt that he had the most beautiful wife on this planet and felt like the luckiest man being able to enter the restaurant with her on his arm._

 _Her obsession with pins had been obvious to him as it was to everyone around her. She had them in different shapes and sizes, admittedly inherited this obsession from her mother, along with her collection, so he figured he couldn't go wrong with giving her one that would remind her of him. And she was just as happy to pin it on as he was to put on the wristwatch she got him, making sure she would be on his mind whenever he would check the time. Not that he needed any reminder._

 _o-o-o_

Her permission was granted silently this time as she seemed to be welcoming his lips and willing to share hers. First they tasted each other's lips slowly, but kissing her was something he'd been craving ever since she'd walked out his door the other morning, so he decided not to hold back any longer. He got more and more eager and closed her in his arms, enjoying the moment to the fullest. She made him feel like he was in his twenties again, as if time had stopped and all the pain they had gone through had never existed.

"We shouldn't," she mumbled as she distanced herself from him all of a sudden, breaking their contact, which was something he had been unable to do. "Not now," she added, clarifying that it was the timing she found problematic and not the kiss itself. They were both still breathing heavily and it would have been all too easy to disobey her and try again, even though he was aware the guests could ring the doorbell any minute. That was the only reason he chose to let it go, for now.

"I know," he agreed and decided to lay down some of his cards. He counted with her not being able to say no to him under the circumstances. "Would you have dinner with me sometime next week? Just the two of us." He was asking her on a date, hopefully that much was clear. And when he dared to look into her eyes he believed that she understood.

"I'd be happy to," she responded without taking much time to think.

He stroked the pin again trying to hide the smile that was spreading on his face. Being with her meant happiness, and today he had his fair share of that. He wouldn't trade it for anything else.

o-o-o

 _As their special day was nearing Kurt noticed that his fiancé's happiness wasn't perfectly uncloudy and eventually he realized that the reason for that was the lack of contact with her father. He was aware that she'd sent him an invitation to their wedding, but as far as he knew she hadn't heard back from him. Since he didn't want anything to interfere with what was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives and he was also aware he was the reason father and daughter hadn't talked lately, he decided to take actions in his own hands, risking Diane's anger._

 _When he parked in front of the house where Diane had probably grown up he felt guilty doing something like this without her knowing, but there was no way back anymore. He reminded himself that he was doing it for her and got out of his car with this determination._

 _After he rang the bell he waited quite long, not even sure the owner of the house was home, but eventually the door opened and a tall grey haired man was staring at him from behind it. He'd seen pictures of Diane's father, but the resemblance between the two was more obvious in person._

" _Mr. Lockhart, I'm really sorry to drop by unannounced. I'm Kurt McVeigh, your daughter's fiancé."_

 _He almost expected the man to close the door he had just opened right in his face, but instead after a few seconds of silence he did the opposite, let him in._

" _To what do I owe this visit?" The older man asked without inviting him in further than the hall, but this was already more than Kurt had hoped for._

" _I just wanted to introduce myself as we are going to be relatives very soon and we haven't had the pleasure to meet." Pleasure wasn't quite what he was feeling, but that was beside the point._

" _Does Diane even know that you're here, Mr …?"_

" _McVeigh, sir, but please call me Kurt. And no, she doesn't. And to be honest I don't really know the details, but Diane mentioned that you weren't exactly thrilled about her pregnancy and well … me, so I thought I should be allowed to speak for myself." He realized he had nothing to lose here. He would either be able to convince him that abandoning his daughter now was a mistake, or things would just continue to be the same as before._

" _I surely appreciate your guts, so speak if you must." Realizing he'd passed the first test, Kurt only became more confident._

" _I want to reassure you that I love your daughter very much and that I'm doing everything in my power to make her happy. And once your grandchild is born I'm going to be the best father you've ever seen." He meant every word he said, and even though Diane's father seemed skeptical, at least he listened._

" _Strong words from such a young man. I can only hope for my daughter's sake that they aren't only words," he responded, so Kurt felt like he needed to be a little more convincing._

" _I can reassure you sir that Diane and I are truly happy and I'd encourage you to see it with your own eyes and join us in celebrating our wedding day. It would mean the world to Diane." That was his last card, because he had no doubt that the man loved his daughter and probably regretted the way he had acted towards her, even though he might never admit it. Both father and daughter were just a little too proud, but Kurt didn't mind being the middle man if it contributed to his fiancée's happiness._

" _I'll be honest with you, son," his tone suddenly changed, much to Kurt's surprise. "I hadn't expected my daughter to completely stop any contact with me just because we had a fight. It wasn't the first time and it probably won't be the last. But she is my only child and I love her. And I probably wouldn't have missed her wedding either way, but thank you for taking the first step. I can see that you are a straight forward man and we have that in common."_

" _I am, sir." Kurt finally allowed himself to smile a little, it was an important victory after all._

" _I have to admit that nothing makes me happier than seeing that you care about her so much as to risk her anger over finding out you went behind her back." They both knew Diane well, but Kurt had a small hope that once she and her father reunite she won't hold this visit against him much longer._

" _I'm convinced that I made the right decision," Kurt declared firmly. He already felt that it was worth it._

" _I think you did. So if you have some time to spare, I'd like to invite you in for a drink and you could tell me about yourself. We are going to be relatives after all." The invitation was rather unexpected, but it completely flattered him. He hadn't counted with being able to break the ice so quickly._

" _It would be my pleasure, sir," Kurt commented with a grin on his face and followed him._

" _And I think it's time you stop calling me sir."_

o-o-o

The kids arrived very soon after the accepted dinner invitation, not giving Diane and Kurt too much time to be alone and feel tempted in each other's company. When Liam found out his mother had been helping with the meal he looked not only surprised, but probably suspicious too, at least that's what Kurt understood from the questioning gaze he tried to ignore. The other morning Liam had been too happy to give Diane's presence too much thought, but Kurt was aware they wouldn't be able to fool him for too long. They had to be more careful.

The celebratory dinner turned out quite well. All four of them were in a great mood, they enjoyed the food and the conversation was flowing. Kurt was relieved to see that Eryn was just as happy about becoming a mother as his son and he was convinced that – married or not - the two would make wonderful parents. Since the topic of marriage didn't come up, he figured it probably wasn't decided yet. Liam would surely tell him if anything changed.

Diane contributed to their happiness by gifting the young parents to be a rubber fish toy that used to be Liam's favorite. The gesture meant a lot to both the son and his father. Diane once again proved that she cherished the good memories of their past and with her presence and active contribution to the dinner she probably meant to show that she was there for Liam, his girlfriend and their baby. Tonight it truly felt as if they had been a family again and Kurt couldn't help wishing for more meals like this in the future.

When Eryn and Liam announced that they would leave, Kurt was hoping it didn't mean that Diane would follow their lead. He just wished to have more time alone with her, maybe he could even convince her to stay the night. It may not have been the smartest thing to do, but if he was true to himself, it was what he really wanted.

He looked at her, hoping his eyes reflected his hopes, but either the message wasn't clear, or maybe it was but she decided to do the opposite because she declared that she had to go too.

"I'll pack up some of the food for you," he offered as a last resort, "could you give me a hand?" He invited her to join him in the kitchen, praying she wouldn't question it, just go with him.

"Sure," she followed to his relief and when the door of the kitchen closed behind them he turned to her.

"Do you really have to go?" he questioned her with sadness in his eyes.

"I do," she nodded, but her expression didn't fully support her reply. He could tell that she was hesitant and probably tempted.

"How can I convince you to stay?" he challenged her, taking a step closer, and he was happy to see she didn't back away.

"Don't you think it's for the best?" She smiled and he almost wished she hadn't because it only made her even more beautiful and irresistible. "Besides how do we explain it to Liam if I stay?" This time she was the one who challenged him.

"Is that your only concern? We could simply tell him what's going on. He is an adult now, he will understand." He wasn't really convinced that Liam would really understand, but at this moment he didn't care. After the day they had spent together who would blame him for wanting her even more? He only had to open his arms to be able to embrace her and he would have done it if their son and his girlfriend hadn't been in the other room.

"Let's not involve him in this yet, he was hurt enough by us in the past, probably still is," she reminded him that what he suggested was rather selfish and all he could do was nod and accept that she was right. "Besides not even I understand what's going on, how could I explain it to him?" He knew that she made a valid point. It was probably too early to bring a third person into this already complicated situation.

"That's all the more reason for you to stay. Give us a chance to be able to figure it out together." He tempted her one last time, even though he was already sure of her reply.

"Not tonight, I'm sorry," she shook her head and the rejection hurt him, but only until she closed the gap between them, placed her palms on both sides of his face and united their lips in a kiss.

In fact it wasn't only a kiss, it was more like a silent promise that their time will come soon enough, and all he had to do was be patient, because it would be worth it.

"Call me about dinner," she whispered into his ears and he could already see himself dial her number an hour after she left, hoping it wouldn't be too early.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

Diane pushed the car door and rushed towards the entrance of the restaurant. She was only a few minutes late, but she didn't want her lunch partner to get impatient. She had no doubt that the other woman would understand, in fact Diane had already texted her to explain her absence, she was still rushing inside, towards the table where the brunette was sitting.

"I'm so sorry," Diane apologized as soon as she was within earshot.

"Don't worry about it," Eryn gestured with her hand and stood up to give Diane a hug, which she returned, then they both sat down on opposite sides of the elegantly decorated table.

"I wasn't sure what you'd like to drink," Eryn pointed out, taking a sip of her orange juice.

"It's fine, I'll take care of that. Have you decided on the food?" Diane grabbed the menu, even though she already knew what she'd order, since she had lunch at this place on a regular basis. She had been the one suggesting it for their meeting that Eryn had initiated.

"Yeah, pork chops sounds tempting," the girl responded.

"Oh they make a great one here, but today I'd rather have something lighter," she declared, taking a brief look at the salad selection.

Once the waiter took their orders, Diane got comfortable in her chair and only focused on her lunch partner. Pregnancy suited her, she was practically glowing.

"So how are you handling the pregnancy?" she asked. She wasn't entirely sure what was the reason for the invitation, so small talked seemed like the smart decision until their food arrived.

It wasn't the first time they had lunch together, without Liam being present. Diane really liked the girl so she had aimed for a friendly relationship with her from the very beginning, and Eryn apparently felt the same way.

"I have better and worse days. This week's been all right so far," the brunette noted with a smile.

"Hope it stays that way," Diane expressed wholeheartedly.

"Me too. How was it for you? Morning sickness?" Eryn inquired.

Diane tried to think back how often she had gotten sick during her pregnancy, but she probably blocked out those memories, because only a few occasions came to her mind.

"Fortunately it wasn't that bad," she replied, "It was a much bigger problem that I overworked myself so naturally my body had to protest."

"I'm not really ready to give up work yet either," Eryn mentioned what Diane had suspected, since they were in very similar shoes.

"You still got time," she encouraged the girl with a smile.

"I think Liam would like me to work less already, and my mother too," she rolled her eyes.

Diane didn't doubt her mother would have had the same opinion, since she'd had a different life, just like Eryn's mother. Their lives were mostly about their children, while Diane's and Eryn's priorities were different.

"They need to trust that you know what's best for you, even if you don't always do." Diane chuckled, since she was talking from experience.

She remembered her own mistakes all too well, but at least she had tried to learn from them on her own way.

The waiter interrupted them for a few seconds to deliver their meals, and once he was gone they both started eating.

"It feels good to talk to someone who gets it," Eryn noted with a smile and Diane was glad she could be of some help.

"I'm happy to offer my company anytime," she reassured her. The girl was carrying her grandchild after all, she was family and Diane wanted to be there for her, Liam and the baby as much as they would let her. Eryn seemed to be grateful for the company and this way Diane somehow also felt closer to her son.

"Did Liam tell you that I wasn't sure I wanted to keep the baby?"

The girl was being completely honest to her, so Diane decided to give her the same courtesy.

"He did, and believe me when I say I know exactly what you went through," she noted supportively.

"Did you have your doubts back then too?" she inquired and her eyes were simply begging for understanding.

"I didn't want Liam to know, but I think I can be completely honest with you, I did. They only lasted for a few days, but still it wasn't an easy decision to make." It might have been too much to handle for her son to know this, but she had simply needed those few days to get used to the idea that her life would completely change. And Eryn was experiencing the same.

"It's not, I can only hope I made the right one," Eryn sighed and shifted her eyes on her food for a while. Diane had a feeling she was about to find out the reason for their get-together.

"I hope you did too, I know I did," she noted encouragingly and placed her hand on Eryn's for a few seconds to reassure her she was listening. It took the girl a while to look her in the eye again, but Diane could see the trust in the brown orbs.

"And now I have another decision to make, which is why I suggested that we meet," Eryn revealed and from the way she played with the food on her plate, Diane assumed that she was nervous. "Liam asked me to marry him."

Diane remembered Liam had told them about wanting to propose, but the subject hadn't come up during their dinner and she hadn't heard from him since, so she assumed he hadn't done it yet.

"And you don't know what to do," Diane concluded understandingly. Their situation was all too similar, only a few decades apart. And she felt really flattered that the girl chose to talk to her about all of this.

"I wasn't ready for a baby to begin with and now marriage is on the table too, feels like it's too much at the same time." She didn't have to explain it in details for Diane to know exactly what she meant. That was most likely why she trusted her with all this information.

"That's how I felt too back then," she offered her proof that it was completely normal.

"Why did you say yes?" she posed the question and Diane didn't need to think of the answer for long.

"Because it felt right," she declared with a smile. It was that simple. Eryn would hopefully end up feeling it too.

"And then what happened?" Eryn asked and Diane quickly understood where she was coming from.

"That's quite a heavy subject for a lunch break." She opted for a way out. She wanted to be supportive and helpful, but she wasn't sure sharing her failure would lead there. She didn't want to influence the girl's decision that way. They may have been in a similar situation, but Eryn had to figure certain things out on her own.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude," Eryn noticed she may have gone too far and apologized.

"No, you're not. But let's not go into details now. How about we leave it for another time?" Diane suggested, not to be completely rude. This would give her time to consider what she should share with her on the first place.

"Okay. But you and Kurt seem to be getting along now," she noted observantly.

"That's true," Diane admitted, careful not to give herself away more than she already had.

"I think Liam is a little worried about that," Eryn pointed out what Diane had already suspected after the looks her son had given her Saturday night.

"I'd imagine he is. But he has no reason to worry," Diane tried to reassure her, although she wasn't quite sure herself.

Whatever was going on between her and Kurt would soon end up effecting Liam as well and since the boy still hadn't forgiven her for the past, she was walking on really thin ice here. She had to be a hundred percent sure what she wanted before she'd take any further step.

o-o-o

 _Diane just woke up from a great night's sleep. She was sleeping longer and longer lately, sometimes she even arrived at work later, because she was simply unable to get out of bed. She was aware that the time when she needed to stop working was getting closer and closer, yet she was still trying to postpone it._

 _But today she didn't need to worry about being late, in fact she could have stayed in bed all day if she wanted to. But she was craving a glass of juice so much that she was willing to give up the comfort of the warm sheets and get some juice from the kitchen._

" _Good morning, how are you feeling?" Kurt's mom greeted her downstairs, while her son was nowhere to be seen._

" _Good morning, I'm okay, just thirsty," Diane responded then looked around trying to find her fiancé._

" _Kurt went to the store, to get a few things, he'll be back soon," Margaret reassured her as if she was reading her mind. And often Diane had a feeling she actually did._

" _That's okay, just going to have some juice." She entered the kitchen, not doubting her future mother-in-law would follow her. Diane still felt quite uncomfortable in her house, and being watched by her all the time was the main reason. Even though she probably didn't mean any harm, simply wanted to look after her._

" _In case you're hungry, I made pancakes," she proved her right at once with this offer._

" _Thank you, I'm actually starving," Diane smelled the pile of pancakes, feeling her stomach rumble._

" _Excited about the wedding?" Margaret asked once they both sat down at the table and Diane started to eat._

" _I am, very much," she reassured the woman with a smile._

" _Don't forget to try the dress on, make sure it still fits," she warned her, making Diane chuckle._

" _I won't forget," she promised. She had another fitting two days before the wedding to make sure everything would be perfect. Well, as perfect as it can be in the final stage of a pregnancy._

" _You will look beautiful in it," Margaret noted and even though Diane appreciated the comment she couldn't help being sarcastic._

" _I'll look like a balloon," she pointed out._

" _But a beautiful balloon," the woman smiled encouragingly. "You still don't know if your dad is coming?" she changed the subject all of a sudden, reminding Diane of why she had waited so long to set a wedding date on the first place._

" _Haven't heard from him, maybe I should call." She had been thinking about what to do. She really wanted her dad to be there on the wedding, and maybe he was actually waiting for a gesture like that._

" _Maybe," she responded briefly._

" _I mean he's the only family I have, the wedding won't be the same without him."_

 _She couldn't really imagine it without her father, she was simply in denial about this until now, hoping for some miracle. But it hadn't happened and the realization hit her hard this time. Or maybe it was only the hormones that played with her emotions because she found herself in tears._

" _It's okay, I'm sure he will be there, he will regret it otherwise," Margaret tried to console her, but it had the opposite effect._

" _If mom was still alive it would be different. She would never have let this happen," Diane burst out in tears, not even minding who was the witness of her outburst. She had been trying to appear strong in front of Kurt, but these feelings had to surface eventually._

" _Your dad will come to his senses, he wouldn't want to miss his only child getting married."_

 _Diane wanted to believe that so badly, but she had been losing hope day by day._

" _I hope you are right." She made an attempt to dry her tears and accepted the tissue she offered to wipe her face._

" _I know we don't know each other that well yet, but you make my son happy and that makes me happy. And I just want you to know that you can count on me." This was an unusual thing to hear from the woman Diane didn't know that well yet, but she appreciated her words, even if she only said them to make her feel better._

" _Thank you," she pressed her hand for a second to show that she listened. "The pancakes are amazing," she added and continued eating silently._

o-o-o

"I'm just calling to ask how your day was," Kurt's comment made Diane smile in an instant. It felt incredibly good to have someone call who cared. She had almost forgotten how it felt to share the events of the day with someone.

"It was good, nothing special, beside my lunch with Eryn," she responded.

Kurt had called every night since Saturday and she was starting to get used to it. By Tuesday she had already been waiting for his call.

"How did it go?" he inquired, audibly showing real interest.

"She told me that Liam proposed to her."

She had been wondering if Kurt had known, she assumed he would have told her if he had, but she couldn't be sure.

"He said he would, but he never called, so I thought maybe he postponed the plan." She was glad that Kurt didn't keep anything from her, but she now wondered why their son hadn't called his father.

"Apparently he didn't, it's just that Eryn needs time to think." It was almost scary how their son was actually going through the same thing they went through in the past. She still wished to protect him from any harm, but at the same time couldn't help sympathizing with Eryn as well.

"Should I call him? He might need me. Then again he would have called." He sounded disappointed and Diane felt the need to defend Liam to make Kurt feel better.

"Maybe he's been busy and simply doesn't want to worry you. You could still call him and maybe he'll tell you," she suggested what seemed like the best option.

"I think I will. Thank you for telling me." He sounded grateful and she was glad she was able to do something for him for a change.

"Of course," she smiled to herself.

"So when are we having that dinner?" He switched to a more pleasant subject, he hadn't brought it up until today. And under the circumstances she didn't want to disappoint him again, even though she hadn't quite made up her mind about them yet.

She figured it would be best to take things slow, because she wasn't sure they were doing the right thing. And there was Liam to consider too. It was obvious to her by now that Kurt wanted more, but was it also what she wanted? She wished to avoid falling back to old habits by giving in to him, simply because it was the easy thing to do, because he was there. Getting his hopes up then disappointing him again would be wrong. First she needed to come clear about her own desires.

But she'd already agreed to that dinner, so they might as well set a date. Talking every day was a good start and nothing would happen between them that they both didn't want. And if she was honest to herself she was looking forward to seeing him again. Those breathtaking kisses they had shared a few days ago were still haunting her.

"How does Friday sound?" That was still three days away, close and far at the same time.

"Perfect, will you let me cook for you?" he inquired, and she didn't have to wonder what the offer meant. If they went out to dinner, the evening could end sooner, but if they got together at his or her place it would most likely turn out differently, and that was something she had to consider. She wanted nothing more than to be able to get lost in his kisses, but it probably wouldn't have been smart. They shouldn't just let their passions guide them, because of their history and especially their son.

"Let me think about that," she asked for a little more time, still leaving him the hope that she would say yes.

"All right. I'll ask again tomorrow," he responded, making her smile.

"I'll have my answer by then," she promised. "And now tell me about your day."

She leaned back on the couch, because she wasn't ready to hang up yet. And maybe with time he would be able to convince her that having him cook for her was exactly what she needed.

o-o-o

 _The dress was too white and she felt like she didn't deserve to wear this color. But it was tradition and since they were trying to do the right thing with time she managed to get used to the idea and the color. And the longer she looked at herself in the mirror the better it felt wearing the fashionable creation._

 _This time she didn't have to rush, since Kurt wouldn't come home that night. To honor tradition they decided that he should stay at the farm, since it was the night before their wedding. He hadn't really wanted to leave her alone, but she had managed to convince him that it was important. And she promised to call if she needed anything._

 _She couldn't believe the day had finally arrived, and only one thought kept her from being perfectly happy. But she was still happy and despite looking like a balloon she also noticed that she looked beautiful, and she was aware that Kurt would see her like that even more. She couldn't wait for him to finally set eyes on her in the carefully chosen dress._

 _When the doorbell rang her first thought was that maybe her fiancé couldn't stay away? She didn't want to risk that he saw her in the dress before the wedding. So she went to the door first to check if it was really him._

" _Kurt? Is that you?" she asked on the way, but no answer came. The silence unsettled her. "Is someone there?" she raised her voice and she was actually scared to look through the peephole now and wished Kurt was there._

" _It's me, dad." The answer finally came and Diane stopped at the unexpected surprise. She couldn't believe her ears. After not hearing from him for months he was right there at her door, the night before her wedding. His timing was definitely impeccable._

" _Diane? Will you please let me in?" he inquired, reminding Diane that her silence was getting longer._

" _Of course," she responded, although she wasn't sure he could hear her. But she walked up to the door and opened it._

 _Now it was her father's time to be stunned, and she could see how his eyes widened as he looked her up and down. It wasn't only her white dress, but her belly too that caught his attention. Last time they had met she hadn't even had a baby bump, but by now she couldn't hide it even if she tried._

" _My God, you look beautiful, sweetheart." He finally found his voice and Diane already felt a tear forming in her eyes. She couldn't believe that he was there to begin with and something told her he didn't come to fight._

" _Thank you," she smiled, "come in."_

 _He walked inside and placed a kiss on her cheek, which also reassured Diane that his visit would be peaceful. She closed the door and entered the living room to take a seat on the couch, careful not to harm her dress and her dad followed her lead. Since he was the one showing up she wanted to hear him out, assuming he came for a reason._

" _I know I owe you an apology," he started, proving her right. And it felt really good to hear his words. "I shouldn't have talked to you that way. I have thought about it a lot and I think I simply wasn't prepared and let it out on you. I'm really sorry," he stressed the word and Diane felt as if a weight was lifted from her heart. She couldn't quite comprehend it yet, but her slightly imperfect happiness just became fully perfect._

" _I wasn't prepared either," she pointed out. He had been quite selfish, but he had finally come to his senses and that's all that mattered. Although she couldn't help wondering what caused this last minute change._

" _I know, darling, I should have been supportive, can you forgive me?" He clearly meant every word and she really didn't need anything more._

" _Of course, I'm so glad you're here. The wedding wouldn't have been the same without you. That is if you're coming." She was quite certain the timing of his visit was intentional, but she wished to hear it from him nevertheless._

" _I wouldn't miss it for the world," he reassured her and she had to try hard to keep back her tears of happiness. She didn't want to risk ruining her dress._

" _Kurt is a really good man, you'll see once you get to know him." She was aware that bringing Kurt up was a risk, but her dad had to understand that they were a family now, no matter what he thought of him._

" _He definitely seems like one. We had a little chat the other day," he admitted, to Diane's surprise._

" _How come he never told me?" She was quite confused. Did Kurt go behind her back or was it her dad's idea. She couldn't wait to see clearly on this matter._

" _I asked him to, I wanted it to be a surprise. He loves you very much and that is all I needed to see."_

 _The last time they had talked he couldn't care less about this, but she decided not to hold it against him. All that mattered was that they were finally on the same page again._

" _So does this mean we have your blessing?" she asked, not doubting the answer anymore._

" _You do," he responded with a smile. "I can't believe my little girl is getting married already. I wish your mom could see you right now," he noted proudly and Diane had to hold back her tears again, but her eyes became watery nevertheless._

" _You know I miss her even more nowadays," she admitted, reaching for a tissue. "I wish she could teach me things, I don't want to become a bad mom."_

 _She had been reading books and Kurt's mom had offered her help already, just like some of her friends, but she was still scared of motherhood._

" _I wish I could be of more help, but I can say one thing. If you will love this child the way your mother loved you, it will be enough," he reassured her._

" _I already do."_

o-o-o

The staff meeting simply wasn't going well, it was one of those moments when she felt as if all her employees were incompetent. Except for maybe Alicia, and of course Kalinda, but she should have just sent everyone else home, because them being there didn't make a difference.

"What I give a damn about is…" she raised her voice and stood up to give more stress to her words, but when she glanced to the side she forgot what she was about to say. And the reason was the man that was walking in the hall. "Is….What I give a damn about is….a….it's just…"

What was he doing there? Why would he show up unannounced? They weren't supposed to meet until Friday, and now he simply shows up without a warning? Distracting her at work. This simply wasn't acceptable.

"It's not just…a…it's just…" she completely forgot what she wanted to say, and it didn't help that he noticed her and they shared a look. She would need to tell him never to do this again. It was embarrassing to forget her own thought in front of her employees, who must have noticed the reason for her distraction. But this staff meeting had been a waste anyway, so she decided it was time for a break.

"Will you give me a minute?"

She rushed out the room straight to her office where he was waiting for her.

"Hey, is everything okay? Thought we would talk on the phone." She felt a bit embarrassed and unsure how to greet him. It was hard enough to figure out where they stood when they were alone, but here they weren't. Not even after she closed the door of her office without them, the glass didn't hide anything.

"I'm sorry, but this can't wait," he responded in a faint voice.

She had been too busy controlling her own reactions to notice the expression on his face that was all too disturbing now.

"Did something happen? Is everything okay with Liam, Eryn, the baby?" She felt her heart beating faster and her palms became sweaty.

"It's not about them, it's about me," he clarified and she really didn't know what to think anymore.

"You are scaring me," she admitted, practically begging him to finally tell her what was going on.

"I'm being sued for thirty-six million dollars. I need a lawyer."


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

"Thirty-six million?" Diane's eyes widened at the impossible amount, and Kurt simply nodded.

When he had gotten the subpoena earlier that day he couldn't believe his eyes. During his over thirty years in the business it had only happened a handful of times that he got sued, but this was definitely the most serious case. Even his insurance company had turned him down right away and suggested he'd find a lawyer on his own. He had no idea where he'd get so much money. He surely wouldn't sell his only property to gift its value to a criminal.

"Who is suing you?" she asked while she sat down at her desk and gestured with her hand for him to do the same on the opposite side.

"Jason Beltran," he voiced the name with disgust. He hated this situation he was in right now, but didn't doubt that he'd come to the right person.

"The one who just got his life-sentence overturned?"

Kurt wasn't surprised that she was so well informed.

"Yep, he was freed, because they made a mistake in the Cook County Crime Lab," he explained.

"I thought he was freed because he was innocent and the cops set him up."

He didn't blame her for thinking like that. Innocent until proven guilty, that was the rule she earned her living with.

"He was freed because a crime lab tech made a mistake," he pointed out patiently, as his lips curled up slightly. Even under the circumstances he enjoyed their verbal back and forth.

"I heard she manufactured evidence."

"Yes, and lied under oath. I didn't manufacture evidence, but my trial testimony supported the lab tech's findings. Beltran is coming after me because my ballistics testimony helped convict him."

Even the assumption that he would have colluded with that lab tech was offensive to him. He was more than capable of coming to his own conclusions.

"Didn't he say that he was an innocent bystander and the cops came after him, because he was black?" From her tone he couldn't guess if she actually believed that was the truth.

"He was lying," he stated. He was still convinced that Beltran shot and killed that police officer, and hoped he'd have the chance to prove himself. His career was on the line thanks to that scum, so he was willing to fight him to his last breath.

"Okay, you see the problem is our firm benefited from this Cook County Crime Lab malfeasance, we had two criminal cases overturned, so I need to discuss it with my partner." She was being careful and he understood her reasons.

"That's all right," he noted, trying not to sound disappointed.

"But even if we decide to take it, are you sure you want me as your lawyer? I could ask Will to represent you."

He didn't have to think twice about his answer.

"I'd rather have you, if it's not too much trouble." He made eye contact with her, so she knew he meant it. She was the one he trusted and she had to understand that.

"No, of course not, I'd be happy to help," she reassured him.

"Thank you," he sighed with relief. Even if she didn't say yes yet, he was already feeling better sharing this burden with her.

"I'm sorry you got into this mess, I'll do everything I can to help. If we can't take the case, I'll find you the next best lawyer in town," she promised and placed a hand on his hand that was resting on the desk. He really appreciated her compassion.

"Beltran is asking for way too much money, and the insurance company turned me down." And it wasn't even only his money on the line, it was his reputation, basically his whole career. No one would ever hire him again if Beltran was able to prove what he accused him of.

"We will figure something out," she reassured him and they shared a short smile before she pulled her hand back. "I'll talk to Will and have our investigator look into the evidence. Can you come back in a few hours? I'll call in advance to confirm." She was in lawyer mode again and he felt that he was in the best hands. That's why he was there after all.

"Of course. I'll call Liam, so he hears it from me. Even if I don't want to worry him." He wasn't looking forward to that conversation, but he needed to get it over with.

"I'm sure he can handle it. You'll need both our support," she noted and he couldn't have been more grateful to have hers.

"Thank you, for everything," he stood up, ready to leave. "Hope to hear from you soon," he added.

He looked at her, and saw she was already deep in thoughts about how to help him out of this trouble. But when she glanced at him their eyes locked for a short while. He saw that she was fully on his side and wanted to do everything she could to help. He wasn't sure what she saw in his eyes, but suddenly she got up, and before he knew it she was already standing next to him and wrapped her arms around him.

Her hug was more than comforting and he gave into it fully. Feeling the heat of her body was just what he needed at this moment. Her closeness reassured him that everything would be all right.

o-o-o

 _She was back at work again way too soon for his taste, given their son wasn't even one yet. But she insisted and he didn't want to hold her back. He even offered his help whenever she had a case he could support with a ballistics testimony. At least this way they had the chance to spend more time together._

 _Assisting her on a case usually involved them spending time in the lab he worked at. It wasn't his own, but it was his dream to build one someday and she fully supported it. Even though she never failed to express her dislike for guns. Which was why that day she seemed different. While he was packing away the things he'd used for the experiment he noticed that she was eyeing the lab's gun collection with obvious curiosity._

 _He was about to ask or better tease her about it when she turned to him with a serious expression._

" _I have a confession to make. I…I've never fired a gun before," she admitted and he smiled in relief that it was nothing serious after all._

" _I sort of figured. Do you want to try it?" he offered. He had been meaning to offer to teach her, but waited for her to bring up the subject on her own. And she finally did._

" _No…I mean…I couldn't," she protested, but he didn't believe her. Simply because he saw the spark in her eyes and the curiosity. She wouldn't even have mentioned it otherwise._

" _Sure you could. I promise you it's not a big deal." For some reason he didn't doubt that she would end up enjoying it._

" _It's a big deal for me. My dad is one of the biggest supporters of gun control in Illinois," she reminded him._

" _We don't have to tell him. And who knows, you might end up liking it," he added teasingly._

" _Oh I doubt that very much." Her protest was actually very cute and he could never say no to such a challenge._

" _I'll tell you a secret. Shooting can be very liberating. With all the stress you are having at work, it could help." He wanted to use every reason he could think of to convince her now that she gave him an opportunity._

" _Don't tempt me." She chuckled and he noticed that she was in fact very tempted._

" _Is that what I'm doing?" He pretended not to know what she was talking about._

" _Okay, I'm willing to give it a try, simply because I'm curious, but if I end up hating it, it will be your fault," she declared and he couldn't help laughing out loud._

" _Understood. You are adorable," he admitted and stepped closer to place a kiss on her neck. "And I bet that you with a gun…it will be very sexy."_

 _He kissed her neck again, this time on a different spot. With his mind's eyes, he was already seeing her with a gun, and it didn't help to keep his distance from her. Not that she seemed to mind. The official part of their meeting was over, they could go back to being a husband and a wife, even if the place wasn't the most ideal one._

" _You can admit that you've been fantasizing about that." She sounded like she was reading his mind._

" _Maybe," he responded with a telling smile._

" _Does that mean without a gun I'm not sexy enough?" she asked, pretending to be offended._

" _You are twisting my words." He chuckled._

" _Am I?" She tried to look innocent and it just turned him on even more._

" _You…are…sexy." He said the words slowly, placing kisses on her neck in_ _-_ _between._

" _I don't think I'll ever get tired of hearing that." She encouraged him, not that he needed much encouragement._

" _Then I will never get tired of saying that," he promised and finally captured her lips in a kiss._

so-o-o

He was trying to bury himself into work, it was the only way to keep his mind busy. He was relieved that Diane had agreed to take his case, but he couldn't fully support her strategy. He wanted to trust her, because he was sure she knew what she was doing, but for some reason it felt hard to follow her advice.

When the doorbell rang he didn't even have to look to know it could only have been her. He wasn't making it easy for her and he felt a bit ashamed for having acted rather childishly. He had actually left in the middle of her interviewing the ballistics experts who could help his case. Simply because he wasn't ready to admit he needed that kind of help.

"Hey, can I come in?" she removed her sunglasses and he obviously didn't even think of saying no. He was actually glad she was there.

"Of course. I'm sorry I left so abruptly. I needed to clear my head. It was too much for one day," he explained and closed the door behind her, then followed her inside his lab.

"I don't blame you. Are you still working?" She looked around.

"Trying, but failing. I'm too preoccupied. I'm really not a fan of the strategy you figured out." She wanted to prove that he made a mistake, and he had a hard time admitting to that. Of course he didn't believe for a second that he was perfect, but when it came to his cases he always gave a hundred percent.

"I could tell, but you should really try to trust me. That's why you turned to me, didn't you?" She made a good point, but he still wasn't fully convinced.

"Of course, but it's not that easy," he pointed out.

"It's okay, I know it's hard, but your testimony will be really important, that's why I'm here. Also you left without signing the retainer," she mentioned, while she was already at the wall checking out the guns.

Somehow she managed to make sure he couldn't keep his eyes off her. Must have had something to do with the mini dress she was wearing and the slowness with which she was moving her body. It crossed his mind that she didn't only come here on business and he decided to forget about the case for a while and just enjoy the moment. Seeing her touching those guns, it was an image he had been longing to see again and here it was.

"Want to fire one?" he offered, thinking that could be a great distraction for the both of them.

"It's been a while," she admitted, looking back at him and he didn't doubt that she was taking a trip down memory lane too.

"You didn't do any shooting without me?" He found himself smiling. He had been the one introducing her to guns, and all those times they had been shooting together belonged to his fondest memories.

"Of course not. So you might need to refresh my memory," she challenged him with a smile and that was all he needed.

He walked up to her and took one of the guns she had touched earlier off the wall. Then he handed it carefully to her, standing right behind her as he explained.

"This is an Austrian bullpup 5.56-millimeter assault rifle. Now, brace it against your shoulder. It's a two-stage trigger, half for semi-automatic, full for automatic."

He was saying the words, but his focus was somewhere else. Her closeness was actually driving him crazy. The memory of the night she'd spent at his place, in his bed was occupying his mind so vividly. They had sort of agreed to take things slowly, but under the circumstances who would blame him for wanting more.

His hand touched hers as he showed her where the trigger was, her body was lying against his for support and he had a hard time focusing due to her heavy breathing.

"I can't sleep with you," she whispered as if she was reading his mind, but this statement turned him on even more.

"Okay," he nodded in lack of a better answer, and intentionally moved closer to her to see if she'd move away, but she didn't.

"I'm your lawyer," she lowered her voice, as if she didn't want to accept her own argument and he moved his face towards hers to hear her better. "It's unethical," she added, but truth be told he couldn't care less. He already felt that he wanted to have her right then and there, to hell with the consequences.

"You just said I forgot to sign the retainer," he whispered back, leaning even closer to her. He didn't want to let her escape.

She turned her head towards him, probably to see if he really meant it. He stood her gaze and was ready for whatever she decided. He could tell that she was tempted, but she still hesitated. It was complicated enough between them, not that it should have mattered at that moment.

He wanted to kiss her so badly, but he didn't move an inch. The decision was in her hands, just like the last time. And he was hoping she'd make the right one.

o-o-o

 _They were outside on the farm, where he usually practiced, and he took a few different guns for her to try. He carefully explained and showed her all the parts of the first one before he let her touch it. He knew it was a sensitive subject to her, so he wanted to be very patient._

" _Don't be afraid, it's unloaded," he reminded her, because he saw the hesitation in her eyes._

" _I'm not," she insisted, but it took her a while to hold the weapon confidently._

" _I started with the smallest one," he clarified._

" _Does that mean there are more?" she responded with a stunned reaction._

" _Only if you want to," he reassured her._

" _We shall see." She lifted the pistol and aimed at the board in front of them._

" _Whenever you're ready, there's absolutely no rush," he said calmly. Even though he didn't show it, he already enjoyed the sight of her with a weapon. He just didn't want to give it away until she didn't seem more comfortable._

" _I think I'm ready." She took a deep breath and gave the gun back to him to load it. She even turned away not to see how he put the bullets in._

" _Okay, it's loaded now, so careful with that trigger."_

 _It took a while for her to reach for the gun and he could see the fear in her eyes._

" _I'm right here behind you," he reminder her, while he showed her how to hold the gun properly. "Do you see the target area?"_

" _Yes." She could barely squeeze the word out and he could feel that she was shaking._

" _Ready to pull that trigger?" He decided to ignore her fear, and gently push her to go through with it._

" _Not really," she took another deep breath, but kept her arm straight, so he figured she was readier than she would admit._

" _What if we pull it together?" he offered._

" _Sounds good," she agreed and sounded relieved._

 _He stretched his arm to reach for the trigger, but waited until she wasn't shaking that badly._

" _All right, on the count of three. One, two, three…"_

 _The bullet landed on the target-stand, quite close to the middle thanks to his help._

" _You did it," he cheered, and only then did he notice her eyes were closed._

" _I did?" she slowly opened her eyes to check their target._

" _That was a pretty good shot," he praised her._

" _It was a team effort," she pointed out. "Will you take the gun so I can breathe again?"_

" _Oh yes, sorry_ _._ _" He freed her from the deadly object and unloaded it._

" _Can't believe I've shot a gun," she walked closer to the board to touch where the bullet hit it._

" _How did it feel?" he inquired._

" _Frightening," she confessed and as she turned back to him he could see that she was still very pale. "But…it was also sort of exciting?" she added, making him smile._

" _Really?" He couldn't believe his ears._

" _I just need to get over my fear. It might take a while."_

 _She walked back to him and he couldn't help putting his arms around her waist._

" _I'm really proud of you," he admitted and enjoyed the way her lips finally curled up._

" _Just please don't make me shoot another one today." She made him chuckle._

" _We will continue another time then." He gave in easily, he wanted to give her all the time she needed._

" _Thank you," she replied with relief and placed a gentle kiss on his lips._

" _Do you mind if I practice a bit then?" He didn't want all the preparation to go to waste._

" _Not at all," she reassured him. "I'll watch you from here," she walked to the side._

 _He took out the largest rifle he brought, he was supposed to show that one to her last. He loaded the weapon and aimed at the target before he fired it a couple of times until the bullets were all gone. He was quite satisfied with the result._

 _She only walked up to him after he'd put the weapon down._

" _Hon, in case I haven't mentioned this before, you are very sexy with a gun."_

o-o-o

When seconds passed without her responding or doing anything he pulled out his last card.

"God, you are still sexy with a gun."

And apparently that one sentence did the trick, because she leaned back in his arms even more.

"Whatever happened to taking me to dinner first?" she teased, but both of them knew she didn't really mean it.

"I could order pizza," he responded jokingly.

"Oh shut up and put this thing away before I change my mind."

She didn't have to say it twice. Within seconds the gun was back in its place and she was back in his arms again. He may have been in a serious professional trouble, but that was the furthest from his mind right now. He felt lucky to have her on his side, in his arms. The taste of her lips was all he craved, the touch of her hands was all he needed to feel to make him forget.

At this moment it didn't even matter to him if he'd lose all his money, because all that meant very little when he was alone. She managed to bring happiness back in his life and he never wanted to let her go again.

So he held her tighter and kissed her harder. Their bodies reacted to each other so naturally. It made no difference where they were, it was easy to forget their surroundings and focus on the other alone.

Because truth be told he could only think of one thing more liberating than firing a gun, making love to her.


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: I know it's been forever and I'm sorry it has taken so long, but I hope some of you are still here and want to read more of this story. I used a special POV for this chapter and it's quite long. :) Happy reading! Special thanks to Ilona and Sab as always 33  
_

* * *

 **Chapter Sixteen**

"I try to avoid early conclusions. In all my investigations, there is an element of doubt. I'm only 80% sure of anything."

First of all, he couldn't believe his ears. _Did his father really just admit that in open court?_ He'd always taught him how science is the one thing that never failed him, but here he was claiming the opposite. And on top of that, Liam couldn't miss how the corners of his lips curled up just a little and the one he made eye contact with could only have been one person. _His_ mother.

Liam prided himself for seeing through this little act his parents seemed to have staged to convince the court of his dad's innocence. And he was all for that. When he'd heard about the trial he hadn't even protested when Kurt had told him Diane would be representing him. Liam was well aware that his mother was one of the best lawyers in Chicago, and if anyone could help his dad out of this stupid mess, it was her. But Liam wasn't sure the judge on the bench understood half of what was going on in front of him and that bothered him a lot. Once it even looked as if the old guy dozed off and that was quite unsettling, considering Kurt's fate was in his hands.

When the plaintiff's lawyer showed the photo of Kurt at a Tea Party rally Liam covered his eyes. That was basically Kurt's only fault in his son's eyes, his political views. And considering Liam had spent more time with him than with his mom, it could seem rather surprising that he was a Democrat nevertheless. And politics was mostly the only thing they ever argued about.

When his mother took over the questioning, Liam was curious to see how she would be able to fight the ridiculous accusations the opposing counsel had made. His father might have been a Republican, but to call him a racist was way over the line. And he was sure this fueled his mother's anger just as much as his. She was fighting for Kurt's truth with her every move and breath and that really impressed Liam.

"Why do you belong to the Tea Party?" she asked the important question. She was willing to defend an organization she despised and that said a lot about her dedication.

"I think the government is encroaching too much into my life," Kurt responded as if it was all scripted between them. But as far as Liam could tell, it all sounded very natural. Up until the point when his mother asked, "Because we're being bankrupted?". This actually made Liam chuckle. What a show these two had just put on. He had to admit he was actually proud of them.

But as he was eyeing his dad's face, the way he was looking at a certain someone, as if no one else existed in the courtroom beside them, all of a sudden an unpleasant feeling took over him.

He had been able to observe them on the weekend already, when they had dinner on the farm, and the morning before when he'd visited his dad after the great news. To assume that he didn't want his parents to get along would have been a lie. Of course he was pleased to see them on friendly terms, even if it had taken them too long to get where they were now. But for some reason he now had a feeling that there was probably more to it than just getting along. He definitely saw more in his father's eyes, and he wasn't sure he liked it.

And that was because he still remembered. The memories of the past were still very vivid in his mind. And most of the time the bad ones overshadowed the good ones.

o-o-o

 _One night he had been too thirsty to fall asleep. He was tossing and turning until he just couldn't take it any longer._

 _He could have just yelled to his dad and he would have been there at once to bring him something to drink, but he wanted to act like a grown-up and do it on his own. His room was closer to the kitchen than his parents' room after all._

 _He opened the door, trying not to make any noise and took a step in the direction of the kitchen when he heard his dad's voice._

" _Don't you think it's time to decide if you're married to me or your work?"_

 _He wasn't yelling, but he sounded loud enough, even from behind the closed bedroom door, and it frightened his son. It was the first time he heard his daddy talk like that. A voice in his head was telling him to run back to his room and forget he ever heard anything, but his curiosity took over, so he slowly got closer to his parents' room._

" _It's not fair that you want to make me choose." His mother sounded upset too and Liam really didn't like whatever was going on._

" _You want to talk about what's not fair? That you haven't been here to put your son to bed in over a week."_

 _Actually, Liam had no idea she was home already. He missed his mom and he knew his dad missed her too. He often noticed that he was sad, glancing at his watch or the clock on the wall in the evening until Liam's bedtime came._

" _How nice of you to throw that at my head. Don't you think I feel guilty enough as it is?" She was much louder now and Liam was certain that his parents were having a fight._

" _Then do something about it. He's growing up, you're missing out."_

" _I'm trying…"_

 _Liam could swear his mother was crying at this point and he began to tear up too. He wished there was something he could do to make it stop, to make it all stop. But he didn't want to get into any trouble. It would be his secret that he witnessed this scenario between his parents. He was only six, but he was already getting good at keeping secrets and this was definitely a painful one._

" _You are not trying hard enough."_

 _When the bedroom door opened Liam quickly rushed back to his own room, but didn't close his door just yet. He wanted to know what was happening next._

" _Where are you going?" His mother asked._

" _Need to clear my head. Don't worry, your son is asleep. He won't need anything from you."_

 _If Liam had been asleep he surely would have woken up by the sound the front door made as he slammed it close. He quickly closed his own door and rushed back to his bed._

 _He wasn't sure what to do. He was still thirsty, but now he was also scared. It was the first time he had heard his parents fight like that and he hated it._

 _He was still fighting his tears when his mother's steps approached, so he pulled the blanket on the top of his head to hide his face and tried to pretend to sleep._

 _The door opened and his mom entered the room. Maybe he should have given away that he was awake, ask her what happened, but truth be told he just wanted to forget what he'd just witnessed._

 _When his mom got closer he feared she might notice that he wasn't asleep, but at the same time he wanted her to get closer. He wished he could have wrapped his arms around her and hug her tightly. He was sure she would have dried his tears in no time. He wanted to feel that everything was all right._

 _Diane sat down on the side of his bed and ran her palm on his back, which actually made him shiver, but it also felt really comforting. He was still a bit frightened and even the thought his dad might not come back crossed his mind. Only briefly though, because deep in his heart he knew that Kurt would never do that to him. He loved his son and he also loved his mom. They may have had a fight, but they loved him and each other, so Liam really hoped it was all going to be all right the next day._

" _I love you my little pumpkin." Diane whispered._

 _Hearing this, a warm feeling took over the little boy. His mother loved him, she always had and she always would, even though she wasn't always able to show it._

o-o-o

When he spotted her mother, followed by his father nearing the entrance of the courtroom, he walked towards them, trying to get their attention, but for some reason they didn't seem to notice him. He followed them on the corridor until they entered a room and the door closed behind his dad. He was uncertain what to do. He wanted to know what's going on inside, but something told him not to disturb them because he might not like what he was about to see. So he decided to simply knock.

"Go away."

He couldn't believe his ears hearing his mother's voice, and naturally he got quite upset.

"Can I help you?"

Liam turned around to face a man who was standing behind him.

"Uhm… I don't think so." He glanced at him, then back at the closed door.

"Are you looking for someone?" The young man's face was rather friendly and all of a sudden Liam remembered that he'd seen him talk to Diane in the courtroom, so he figured he knew her.

"My parents just went inside," he explained, clearing his throat.

"You must be Liam then. It's great to meet you. I'm your mom's business partner. Will Gardner." He offered his hand and Liam shook it.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, sir."

"Oh please, call me Will," he insisted.

"Really nice to meet you, Will. So I knocked on the door, but my mom said go away." He chuckled to hide his insecurity.

"That's weird. Maybe she and your dad have something important to discuss," Will suggested and Liam wasn't sure how seriously he meant that.

"Probably."

"We could grab a coffee, if you want. They have to come out in a few minutes anyway," Will pointed out.

"Sounds good." Liam agreed, realizing there was really nothing else he could do under the circumstances, but wait.

Will seemed cool and surprisingly he didn't interrogate Liam about himself or Diane, instead they mostly talked about sports. With their coffees in hand they took a seat in front of the courtroom where Kurt's trial took place and waited for the two of them to show up. Until they did.

"Darling, when did you arrive?" Diane seemed surprised to see her son there, while Liam was eyeing her a bit suspiciously.

"During the hearing. I thought dad had noticed me," he responded briefly.

He didn't like the way they were behaving, especially his dad, who barely made eye contact with him. Liam noticed that his hair was a bit messier and his shirt seemed rather crinkled. Her mom's lipstick looked smudged and her cheeks were redder than usual. Maybe he was just imagining these things, and nothing like what he was beginning to assume happened between them behind that closed door, but he couldn't get rid of the thought.

"It means a lot that you are here," Kurt spoke, still barely looking into his eyes.

"And you've met Will, I see," Diane gestured in the direction of her business partner.

"Yeah, we bumped into each other. But I'm afraid I can't stay any longer, just wanted to say hi and wish you luck, dad." Despite the bad feeling he was facing, he was aware that this was an extremely difficult situation for his father and he was there to show his support. So he hugged him briefly, then his mom as well, before he excused himself, mumbling something about an appointment he couldn't miss.

Once he was in his car he took a few moments to think about what just happened. _Was it possible that his parents were having an affair?_ It sounded ridiculous and surreal at the same time. _What could have gotten into his father? Has he already forgotten about the past? This possibility_ really upset Liam, because he was still unable to forgive his mother for ruining the possibility of a happy life the three of them could have had.

A happy life that they used to share a long time ago, so long that he barely remembered.

o-o-o

 _It was his fifth birthday, which was a huge milestone in every kid's life. He was old enough now to have a say in what way they would celebrate his birthday and he knew exactly what he wanted. Because of his mom's work they simply didn't spend enough time together as a family, so that was exactly what Liam asked for. A whole day together, as a family._

 _Of course he had other demands too. Like a tractor for kids he could drive around when they were on the farm, just like the adults do. He also wanted to go to a fun-fare and have lots of candy. And he insisted that his dad made him his favorite chocolate cake._

 _They actually baked the cake together the previous day and surprisingly even her mom managed to be there to help out. His dad made the pastry, while Liam and his mom prepared the chocolate cream, which the kid tasted several times, like he'd learnt from his dad. They made a mess in the kitchen, but had a really fun time. That night both his parents were there to put him to bed, read him a fairy tale and kiss him goodnight. And his mom sang him a lullaby, which always resulted in him having really sweet dreams._

 _His birthday started with the family having breakfast together and he remembered how happy his parents seemed that morning. His dad even kissed his mom in front of him, which he usually found quite gross, but that day he didn't even complain about it, simply because they looked so happy. And when they were happy, so was Liam._

 _They decided to cut the cake right after breakfast and he got the present he had wished for, which he had to try out right away. His parents simply let him do whatever he wanted all day and he enjoyed every minute of it. He ate so much cake and candy that it was a wonder he didn't get sick. He had the best time playing, eating sweets and most importantly holding the hand of his parents whenever he could. And when he wasn't holding their hands, they were holding each other's hand and that made Liam even happier than he already was. He only wished every day could have been like this._

 _That day was full of laughter, joy and happiness. He wouldn't have traded that birthday for any other kind._

o-o-o

As the memory faded away in his mind, he found himself shedding a few tears. That day was one of his few cherished memories of the three of them. Whenever he was really angry with his mother he tried to remember that day and it usually helped him feel better. He blamed her for the falling apart of their family, even though he never heard his dad say anything of that sort. Kurt had always been way too forgiving and today Liam had seen the proof of that once again.

He couldn't wait to be alone with him and question him about what was going on. Even though he wasn't sure he had the right to judge. He still felt entitled, because he remembered the bad times all too well. He remembered how depressed Kurt had been after the divorce. Even though he loved cooking, back then he hadn't cooked anything for weeks. They barely talked a single word, as if he had been mourning the loss of the woman who he never stopped loving, not even after they had parted for good.

It had taken Kurt months to recover from the divorce and Liam was only a kid back then, so he felt completely helpless. And when he was with his mother he never saw any sign of depression on the woman. And he was afraid to talk to her about his father, so he simply pretended everything was all right the way it was.

He loved both his parents, and had no doubt his mom loved him on her own way, but he couldn't help blaming her and being angry with her. And traces of this anger still existed in the present. The possibility of his mother hurting his father again made him really protective. He had even warned him a few weeks ago, when he'd first heard about them being in contact again. He wished to know what was really going on.

Maybe he should have talked to his girlfriend about his suspicions, but he didn't want to burden her with them in her condition. Not to mention he wasn't even sure what was going on with the two of them. He proposed to her, because he loved her and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and their baby, but she said she needed time to figure out what she wanted and such responses never promised anything good. He wanted her to marry him because she loved him and not because of the baby or because that was the smart thing to do. But she said she needed time, so he waited for her response as patiently as he could.

But maybe it wouldn't be the end of the world if she'd said no. Liam already witnessed a marriage fall apart. Maybe he shouldn't insist on them getting married, since clearly Eryn wasn't sure of it either. The baby was no reason for them to rush into anything. Papers don't make a family, love does. He would make sure to tell Eryn this and that he would be there for her and their child no matter what.

He didn't want to make the same mistake his father had, whatever his mistake had been exactly. Liam wasn't even sure. As far as he knew his father loved his mother deeply, he probably still did. But clearly love wasn't enough. And Liam was afraid Kurt might be making a mistake again. That's why Liam really needed to talk to him. So instead of going home, he began to drive towards the country.


	17. Chapter 17

_A/N: I'd like to thank the readers who are still with this story despite my long hiatus. I'm dedicating this chapter to everyone who reviewed the previous one. I truly appreciate your support. 3_

* * *

 **Chapter Seventeen**

The rest of the hearing felt a bit dragged out. Or maybe it was because his mind was somewhere else. Which he wasn't proud of. The case was about him after all. And even though the judge seemed like an incapable dummy and the plaintiff's witnesses sounded ridiculous, it was about his future, so he had to take it seriously.

But one thing was certain, he was in the best hands, _her_ hands. She agreed to take his case, to be the one representing him and she was doing an amazing job at that. And not surprisingly his admiration turned into lust during the course of the hearing. Sitting next to her or from the stand he was able to observe her every move, drink in all her words. And when he was close he was also able to smell her perfume. And especially that smell reminded him of the day he had signed the retainer agreement, leaving his fate in her capable hands.

Both of them were aware that it was unethical for a lawyer to sleep with their client, but it hadn't stopped them and technically it had happened before he signed the paper. And just like after their night on the farm, he simply couldn't get her out of his head and being together all day only fueled his desires. Seeing her in action, doing what she was the best at, even defending his beliefs, which were the opposite of her own. It all lead to that moment during recess, when he simply couldn't hold back any longer.

When the door closed behind him, he didn't think twice before he took her in his arms, capturing her lips in a breathtaking kiss probably both of them had longed for. Ethics be damned. And it was that kiss and the ones following it that prevented him from focusing for the rest of the day. Maybe those strict ethical rules made sense after all. But at least Diane was able to stay professional and he admired her even more for that.

When the judge finally closed the hearing for the day they left the courtroom together, heading towards the exit. She wasn't very talkative, but he didn't blame her, she was probably tired.

"Are you going back to the office?" he inquired. He wished they could spend some more time together, but it probably wouldn't be smart.

"Yes, still have a few things to take care of," she explained, silently agreeing that it was for the best that they parted now.

"Then I guess, I'll see you tomorrow," he mumbled as they reached the elevator that lead to the parking lot where he'd parked his car. Her office was close, so she'd come on foot.

"I'll be here," she reassured him with an exhausted, but adorable smile.

As daring as he had been in that empty room where no one could see them, he chose to be careful now. As much as he wished to kiss her again, to feel her lips on his, to hold her in his arms, he didn't want to risk jeopardizing the case itself.

"Thank you, for everything." He smiled and touched her hand to press it gently, which made her lips curl up properly this time.

"We're going to get you out of this mess," she promised and he fully believed her. If anyone was able to achieve that it was her. And once they put an end to this case they could go back to exploring their newly found relationship.

o-o-o

 _After the divorce he tried to avoid taking cases in Chicago. It was her territory and he respected that. Obviously they stayed in touch, because they had a kid to take care of who needed both of them. But Liam was the only reason for their interactions and the only subject of their conversations through the phone, or in person when they dropped their son off._

 _Kurt lived on the farm and rarely visited Chicago without a good enough reason. And even when he was there he tried to avoid places where he could have accidentally run into her. It would have been awkward. They had already said everything that needed be said._

 _But once in a while he couldn't avoid appearing in the courthouse. And those occasions were quite stressful for him. The chance of him seeing her in the hallway was rather high, given she was there on a daily basis. So whenever he spotted a woman who looked like her, he instantly assumed it was her and tried to hide or walk the other way. It was an instinct to protect himself._

 _Until one day the blonde he noticed in a crowd was actually her. And instead of walking away he immediately froze and could barely move. She was wearing a red blouse, which was her favorite color and his favorite color on her. No wonder it drew his eyes in her direction. Fortunately she was busy talking to a group of people, so she couldn't have noticed him. Which meant he was able to observe her._

 _When they met because of Liam, Kurt had always been careful not to stare at her, because he wasn't allowed anymore. But now he could do whatever he wanted and he actually couldn't stop his eyes from looking her up and down. There was no use denying that she was still the most gorgeous woman he had ever met. Too bad this beautiful woman had broken his heart into a million pieces and he was still trying to gather the missing ones._

 _He hated himself for still admiring her, but he couldn't help it. She was attracting his eyes like a magnet and when she and her company entered the courtroom it crossed his mind, what if he would follow her. There seemed to be enough people so he could blend in with the crowd and observe her in action without her noticing his presence. Even though his mind told him it was a stupid idea, and he should have left immediately, his feet didn't listen and soon he found himself inside the courtroom._

 _He took a seat in one of the back rows, close to the exit_ _,_ _so he could leave whenever he would be ready to listen to his head. But for now he wanted to be there, because she was there._

 _The hearing started with Diane questioning a witness, so he was forced to take a trip down memory lane. Remembering how it felt when he had been the one she'd been questioning on the stand. How he'd been able to sometimes distract her with one look or move. Even as a married couple they had often sort of flirted in these situations. Mainly because the courtroom was the place for her to shine, where she was – even as an associate - in control. Her dedication to her profession showed through every line she spoke and it made her even more desirable in his eyes._

 _Even now when he was painfully aware that this was why he and their family could only come second with her. This was her life and she had been unable to find the balance she had been looking for all those years they had been together. Now she didn't have to try anymore._

 _In this case she was questioning an eyewitness who testified against her client, but she easily managed to poke holes in her testimony. With every further question the woman on the stand was getting more and more insecure and in the end Diane could definitely celebrate a small victory. It barely showed on her face, but Kurt could read her easily._

 _Watching her opened up so many memories in him and he began to regret that he ever entered that courtroom. Why was he doing this to himself? He should be focusing on getting over her, on moving on. And yet here he was, under the spell of the woman he was clearly still in love with, despite all his efforts._

 _When Diane turned towards the gallery to walk back to her seat, for a second he thought she may have noticed him. So, as soon as she sat down, he quickly stood up and left the room. So the next time she may have turned her head in the direction he had been sitting she would only have seen the empty space. And probably she ended up thinking it had only been an illusion._

 _But for him it was real, and this short but meaningful encounter painfully reminded him that he was still in love with his ex-wife. He missed her, but he wasn't allowed to ever tell her that. But he couldn't help wondering whether she missed him too._

o-o-o

Kurt was surprised to find his son's car in the driveway when he arrived home. Until this moment he hadn't given it much thought that Liam had left the courthouse rather abruptly. But now he began to wonder about it. He felt ashamed that he hadn't noticed his presence in the courtroom. He was way too focused on someone else. But it meant a lot to him that Liam had come to support him.

He entered his home, shouting his name, but no answer came. He figured his son was probably outside. But instead of looking for him, he decided to put together something for them to eat. It wasn't every day that Liam came for a visit after all.

"Dad?" Liam was calling for him soon after Kurt had finished cooking the pasta.

"In the kitchen," he replied, although he assumed the smell of the sauce must have given him away. "Hope you have time for a quick dinner," he added when Liam appeared at the door.

"That's nice of you, but I can't stay much longer." It definitely seemed like something was bothering him, which would also explain his unannounced visit.

"It's almost ready." He tried to persuade him. His pasta Bolognese was one of Liam's favorites.

"Dad, I came here, because I think we need to talk, about you and mom." He didn't hesitate much to reveal the reason, and Kurt was taken quite off guard by this subject.

"There's nothing to talk about." He waved with his hand dismissively, hoping to get out of it easily.

"Are you sure, because what I saw today in the courthouse wasn't nothing." Liam insisted and Kurt tried to recall what he could be referring to.

One thing was certain, he definitely couldn't have seen what happened in that room, and beside that there was nothing to see. Or was there?

"I don't know what you think you saw, but there's nothing going on." He was aware that lying to him wasn't smart, but that's what they agreed on with Diane, that it was too early to tell Liam anything, so he tried to honor her wish.

"You forget that I know you very well dad, I know when you're not being honest with me." Liam seemed disappointed and Kurt couldn't blame him.

He was right, he shouldn't have lied to him, even if he did it to protect him. It was too early to talk about anything anyway. Not even Diane and him knew what was really going on.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to mislead you, but the truth is … complicated." How could he explain it to him when he didn't fully understand it himself?

"And you don't think I have a right to know? I'm your son."

It affected Liam as well, there was no doubt about that. It wasn't only about the two of them. But first they had to establish what was going on exactly.

"We just want to protect you," he tried to explain, but Liam didn't seem to care for that explanation.

"I'm not ten anymore, dad. I'm an adult." He raised his voice a bit and he was right. But at the same time he was still his son and he would always try to protect him no matter how old he was.

"I know, I'm sorry. It's just too soon. Not even I know what's going on exactly," he admitted.

"Nothing should be going on. You need to stop it, dad." Liam sounded very serious and his tone actually hurt Kurt, even though he wouldn't tell him that. He knew he said it out of love.

"You know I love you, son, right?" He hit a more intimate tone, to calm him a little.

"I love you too, dad, and that's why I'm here. I can't just stand by and watch you make the same mistake again."

He definitely meant it well, but Kurt felt like he was judging him without trying to understand him and the situation.

"Maybe we can talk about it over dinner?" he offered.

"I guess I can stay a little longer."

o-o-o

 _Liam had been down for days and Kurt had been observing him suffer silently. He barely touched his food and was even less talkative than usual. Kurt knew that something was wrong, but wasn't sure how to bring up the subject. Until the weekend arrived and he figured out the best way to distract him. He took him fishing._

 _It had been their favorite activity together since he had taken him fishing for the first time when he'd been a little kid. Back then it had been about Liam having fun, catching a few fish and then observing them. He had always loved animals. But later it became something important that the two of them had done together. They would go out early in the morning and spend most of the day at the lake. They would talk or just stay silent, whichever they preferred. But this time Kurt would insist that his son talked about what had been going on with him._

 _He didn't want to push him too much though, so he waited patiently at first and only brought up the subject when they had been sitting there silently for a while._

" _I couldn't help noticing your bad mood this week. If you want to talk about what happened, I'm here." He addressed the topic cautiously and it took a while for Liam to answer._

" _Julie and I broke up." He revealed what Kurt had suspected. It was the only logical explanation in his head._

" _I'm sorry, I can imagine how you must feel." He glanced at Liam, and tried to make sure not to stare, but soon he noticed tears running down his face. "It's okay to cry, son. Let it out. It will make you feel better," he encouraged him. There was no shame in crying, especially not there, where they were alone._

 _Liam buried his face in the sleeve of his jacket, and Kurt gently put his hand on his shoulder to show his support._

" _I'm so stupid. But I loved her." Liam confessed with a faint voice._

" _I know you did." Kurt squeezed his shoulder._

" _She fell in love with someone else. How could she do that?" Liam lifted his face to look at his dad. And Kurt was able to see the pain, but also the anger in his eyes._

" _It's all right to be angry. She hurt you." He reassured him. Julie was Liam's first love, they dated for almost a year, but they were only sixteen. This was bound to happen._

 _After a while Liam's tears dried up and he looked much calmer._

" _I think I'm beginning to understand how you must have felt after the divorce, even though you never really told me why it happened. Did mom also fell in love with someone else?" His question was rather unexpected, but Kurt figured he was old enough now for this subject._

" _No, as far as I know there wasn't anyone else." That's what made the whole situation even worse, that they still loved each other, but in the end it wasn't enough to save the marriage._

" _I remember how depressed you were for weeks and I was scared to ask you about it."_

 _Kurt wasn't proud of his behavior back then, especially in front of his son. He should have pretended to be okay, but he couldn't really help it, those had been the most horrible few weeks of his life._

" _I'm sorry. I should have been better at hiding it from you." He had always feared that Liam may have suffered a lot due to the divorce, even though it fortunately didn't affect his behavior. He heard about children his age who became violent due to the anger, but his son was a lot like him, he inherited his generally calm nature._

" _Will you ever tell me what really happened?" Liam asked this question for the first time._

" _Maybe. But not today. Today is about your feelings. I want you to know that I'm always here for you and you can tell me anything." He knew he still owed his son an explanation, but he figured since he waited all these years, he could wait a bit longer._

" _Thank you dad. I love you."_

 _Kurt wouldn't have traded this relationship he had with his son for anything in the world. He was the best thing in his life and he was proud to be his father. As long as Liam needed him, he would always be there for him. He would even be there when he wouldn't need him anymore, although he hoped that time would never come._

" _I love you too, son."_

 _He smiled at him and when Liam returned the smile Kurt sighed from relief. His son would get over this heartache and find love again. He wished he could have said the same about himself._

o-o-o

He told his son the truth about where they stood with Diane now and how their relationship developed in the last weeks. He left out a few details, but still feared he revealed too much and hoped Diane would understand that he had no choice. He thought he owed Liam that much. Liam was there because he really cared for him and Kurt appreciated that more than anything.

Once he finished talking, he waited for his son's reaction rather anxiously.

"I'm sorry dad, I want to be supportive, I really do, but you know mom as much as I do. What comes first with her has always been her work."

Kurt had hoped that hearing the whole story about him and Diane might make Liam see things differently, but clearly it wasn't the case. He insisted that he knew what was best for his dad, and he was convinced it wasn't his mom.

"I'm aware of that," he sighed. He didn't have false hopes on this front. He had made peace with this fact a long time ago.

"Just please promise that you will think about my concerns. That's all I'm asking." His tone was less demanding and more caring this time, so Kurt didn't regret being honest with him.

"Don't you think I've already thought about all this?" he pointed out. He remembered the past and how much it hurt when their marriage ended. And he knew Diane remembered too. And he wanted to believe that they both learnt from that.

"Then why are you doing this?" Liam asked with sadness and concern in his eyes and Kurt wondered why he even had to ask the obvious. He had already given it away apparently, because that's why Liam was there on the first place.

"I think you know the answer to that," he responded, standing his gaze for a few seconds. He didn't want to say it out loud, he probably wasn't even ready to say it yet, but his actions spoke for themselves.

"I guess I do." Liam nodded and left it at that.

There was no arguing with it after all. Kurt couldn't help the way he felt, and Liam had to know that from experience. This love for Diane had been in his heart from the day they had met, somehow it survived their failed marriage and even stood the test of time. In fact he had no doubt anymore that Diane felt the same way about him, because there was nothing either of them could do about these feelings, that surfaced again. So Liam would have to get used to this idea somehow, and make peace with it. Kurt knew it was a lot to ask from him, because unlike himself, his son hadn't been able to forgive Diane yet.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

A glass of red was Diane's only company that night, while she was lying on the sofa. She was exhausted after the day in court, but she wanted to catch up on some paperwork to make up for the lost time. The whole trial was emotionally hard for her, even though it probably hadn't shown during the hearing. She had been able to fully focus on the goal and fight for her client, just like any other time. The only difference was that this client was someone special.

Most lawyers would probably have said no to defending someone they were emotionally involved with, but she felt the opposite, that she was the most capable person for this task. And so far the trial was going as planned. Although she wasn't proud of that weak moment during recess, when she had been unable to resist him. She promised herself to be more careful from now on. They shouldn't jeopardize his case in any way.

Only one thing unsettled her about the day, she couldn't get her son's expression out of her head. It crossed her mind that Liam was probably suspecting something, even though she wasn't ready for him to find out about her and Kurt just yet. She made a mental note to discuss her suspicions with Kurt if he would call. She had gotten used to his late night calls in the last days. But instead of the phone it was the doorbell that disturbed the silence.

She couldn't imagine anyone else standing there but Kurt and she was ready to playfully scold him for showing up. But instead of the father, it was the son who was waiting to be let in.

"Is everything okay?" She opened the door anxiously, not understanding the purpose of Liam's late and unexpected visit. He barely came to her place, and never without calling ahead, so she instantly began to worry.

"I know it's late, but I have to talk to you," he explained and didn't seem to be in a good mood.

Diane didn't doubt now that his visit was connected to what had happened earlier that day.

"Don't worry about it. Come in. Can I bring you something?" she offered.

"No thank you. I'm coming from the farm. Dad told me what's going on between you too." His declaration, combined with the serious expression on his face unsettled Diane even more.

"He did?" She couldn't decide how she should feel about Kurt betraying her trust like that. She didn't doubt it though that he probably had a good reason for it.

"I cornered him, he had no choice," he admitted.

"I see," she nodded, trying to figure out how to handle this new situation. "And how do you feel about it?" she asked, mainly to gain time for herself. His feelings were written all over his face after all.

"How do you think?" He answered spitefully.

"Tell me, please." She found herself begging.

"Confused, helpless, angry. Why are you doing this to him again?" The accusation in his tone could not be missed.

"Didn't he mention that he was the one who showed up in my office after all this time?" She reminded him, to soften his clearly growing anger.

If Kurt hadn't showed up, if he hadn't wanted to reconnect with her, their son wouldn't be here tonight letting out his anger on her. They had managed to build up a working relationship throughout the years, and she hadn't seen him like this in a long time.

"I know he did, and I wish he had told me about his plan so I could have stopped him." He obviously blamed himself too, even though he shouldn't have.

"It's clear to me that it's _me_ you are angry with nevertheless." She felt a lump in her throat and she couldn't help hiding her face from him. Maybe she deserved his anger on some level, but he blamed her completely, and she couldn't take that.

"I'm sorry, mom, I do love you, but I think you and dad together again is a terrible idea." His tone softened a bit and Diane appreciated the confession more than anything. And of course his opinion on the subject didn't surprise her, why she had suggested to keep it from him as long as they could.

"We are not together," she corrected him.

"But isn't it just a matter of time?" he asked something she didn't know the answer to.

"I don't know," she voiced the truth.

"You were married, it didn't work out, why can't you both move on?" It sounded as if he was talking about a random couple, and not his own parents and that hurt Diane.

"We moved on," she reminded him calmly.

o-o-o

 _One day Liam and Diane were having breakfast together and he asked her a question she would never have expected to hear from him._

" _Mom, have you thought about dating again?"_

 _She was glad she wasn't drinking anything, because she would have spit it right away._

" _Have I….? Why are you asking?"_

 _She didn't really understand where he was coming from, or what was the reason behind his sudden curiosity. Was Kurt dating someone, or was it Liam who was thinking of dating, he was fifteen after all._

" _You and dad have been divorced for years now, I think it would only be natural."_

 _She was surprised how calmly he managed to talk about it. They rarely touched the sensitive subject of the divorce. It had been hard on Liam, but they'd both tried to be there for him, and the worst had already been behind them._

" _Is your father dating someone?" The question slipped out before she could think twice about it. It really wasn't any of her business and she wasn't even sure she wanted to know the answer._

" _I don't know if he wanted me to answer that." Liam responded very wisely._

" _You're right, I'm sorry." She actually felt relieved. If Kurt was dating anyone, she was probably better off not knowing about it._

" _But you still haven't answered my question," Liam reminded her and this time she had to give him something._

" _You know it very well that I don't really have time for dates, but I'm definitely open for anything."_

 _She wasn't lying, but she wasn't telling the whole truth either. She had dated a couple of men during the last years, but she always made sure to do it discreetly. Liam had never met any of her dates, because she thought that was for the best. But none of those were in any way serious anyway. She simply enjoyed having some male company from time to time. But she was nowhere near ready for a more serious relationship, and she wasn't even sure she would ever be._

" _I'm thinking of asking a girl out in school. Do you think she would say yes?" Liam's confession answered Diane's previous question. In fact, she drew the conclusion that it probably wasn't about Kurt dating anyone after all. She was also surprised Liam would share something like that with her, but he probably just wanted to hear a woman's opinion. She still felt quite touched that he would ask her._

" _I'm pretty sure she would. Who could say no to such a handsome boy like you?" She reassured him._

 _Truth was that as Liam was growing up he looked even more like his father and Diane loved and hated it at the same time. So many things on Liam reminded her of Kurt and it actually made it impossible for her to completely get him out of her head. She just knew that someday Liam would sweep a girl off her feet just like Kurt had done with her._

o-o-o

"Aren't there other men out there? How about Will?" Liam suggested something completely unexpected and Diane couldn't decide if she should laugh or cry.

"Will? My business partner? You're kidding, right?" She feared that he really wasn't.

"He seems really cool." Liam insisted and now she felt like banging her head against a wall. She couldn't believe that her son would actually approve of Will as her boyfriend.

"And he's also much younger than me," she pointed out, not that their age difference would have been the only obstacle. They also had a business together, not to mention Will's current girlfriend.

"Not that much." Liam corrected her and he sounded serious. She was glad Will had managed to make a good impression, but this was going too far.

"This conversation feels surreal," she stated, with a forced chuckle.

"My point is, I'm happy that you and dad are getting along, but this feels too much. Am I the only one who remembers the past? Please don't do this to him again," he begged her.

He blamed her for the present, he blamed her for the past, and of course she blamed herself too, but his blame felt a thousand times worse.

"I'm really sorry you feel that way. I know we should have talked about the divorce and why it happened, but you were a kid and by the time you grew up it was long over."

So many things had been left unsaid between them in the past and now it was probably too late for those conversations.

"You broke dad's heart." Liam stated bitterly and there was no arguing with that.

"Maybe we should talk about it, now or whenever you want," she offered.

Maybe it wasn't too late yet? She could only hope. What hurt the most was that she didn't feel her son's love at the moment, no matter what he'd said.

"Maybe we should. But not now. I can't take anymore tonight." He sounded and looked exhausted and she wished that hugging him would solve at least part of the problem, but she didn't dare to do it under the circumstances.

"I'm sorry. We never meant for you to get hurt." She was almost in tears now, but she was holding them back. She didn't want him to see her cry, because his pity wasn't what she needed, it was his forgiveness.

"I'll be fine," he responded, but she didn't believe him. She could tell that he was hurt. They had tried to protect him as best as they could through the divorce, but it hadn't been enough. And what he found out about his parents today managed to open up some old wounds.

"I love you so much, please never doubt that," she confessed, still choosing not to make physical contact with him.

"I know," he looked her in the eye and she could see the pain in his dark orbs. "Good night, mom," he added and touched Diane's shoulder for a split second before he walked out of the room.

o-o-o

 _Only one partner's meeting was standing in the way and Diane was really anxious to finally go home to her son. According to their agreement with Kurt, since the separation Liam spent one week with her and the other with him. They both hoped this would work out and Liam wouldn't suffer too much due to the circumstances._

 _This was Diane's second week alone with Liam, and they both were just trying to get used to this new arrangement. During their first week together she had made sure to spend as much time with her son as possible, and only worked while Liam had been in school. But she couldn't afford this luxury each time she had her son, so for the second week she already had to hire a baby sitter who would take Liam home from school and stay with him until Diane would get home from the office._

" _I'm sorry to interrupt, but there's a phone call for Ms. Lockhart, they say it's urgent." One of the assistants entered the room and even though Diane felt rather ashamed, she also became very nervous guessing the call was probably from the baby sitter._

 _She quickly excused herself and ran to her office to answer the call._

" _I'm sorry Ms. Lockhart, but could you please come home right now? Your son is out of control, and I'm unable to calm him. He says he wants to see his dad right away." The girl sounded very upset and Diane knew she had no choice but to promise to rush home and take care of the situation herself._

" _I'll be there as soon as I can," she reassured her and without telling her superiors she took her purse and rushed out of the office._

 _o-o-o_

 _She already heard her son's voice from the corridor, he was throwing a tantrum that much was clear. She felt sorry for the poor girl who had to witness this on her second day. Maybe it was too early to leave Liam alone with a stranger, Diane definitely regretted it now._

" _I came as fast as I could. What's wrong honey?" Diane rushed to her son, but he pulled away when she wanted to hug him._

" _I don't like her, she said I can't see my dad. But I want to see my dad." He was yelling while his books and toys were lying all over the room._

" _She was right, you can't see your dad today, but you will be able to see him soon." She tried to calm him, but he was too worked up already._

" _But I want to see him now. I'd rather be with him than a stranger. Send her away." He pointed at the girl, who quickly left the room. Diane was almost sure she wouldn't be able to count on her in the future._

" _You shouldn't talk to her that way; she is here to help us." Diane tried to reason with her son, but it was pointless._

" _I don't need her help. I'm old enough to do what I want," he insisted._

" _That's not exactly true," Diane corrected him. He had gone through a lot already, but it didn't change the fact that he was only ten._

" _I want to see my dad," he yelled and Diane quickly considered her options._

 _She could have locked him into his room until he would come to his senses. He would probably keep yelling for a while, then hopefully calm down. He would surely stay angry with her though. Or she could call Kurt and ask for his help. It would mean admitting that she failed, but she figured it would still be the best for Liam. He didn't deserve to be punished, he was the innocent party here and she didn't blame him for missing his dad._

" _How about we call your dad? Would that be all right?" she offered and Liam's face instantly softened._

" _Yes, we should call him. I want to tell him to come and get me." He said cheerfully, without realizing how much it may have hurt her feelings._

" _I'm going to dial his number for you." Diane handed Liam the receiver, hoping Kurt would be able to talk some sense into their son._

" _Dad, please come and pick me up, I don't want to be here, I want to be with you."_

 _The boy almost cried and hearing his heartfelt wish brought tears to Diane's eyes as well._

" _But I don't like it here, not without you."_

 _Diane tried to stay strong, to keep it together, although it was already too much for her._

" _Please come and get me," he was begging him, not making it easy for him either._

" _He wants to talk to you." Liam handed the receiver back to his mom._

" _What happened?" Kurt asked through the line while Diane wished she could just break down and cry. But she couldn't do either._

" _I can't really talk about it right now," she looked at the kid, who was eyeing her with hopeful eyes._

" _I could go and get him, but I don't think that's a good idea," he pointed out and she definitely agreed. She was just unable to figure out what to do._

" _I don't know how to calm him down," she admitted in a faint voice. She hated that she failed so early, but she could only blame herself. She hadn't spent enough time with her son, so he needed his dad more than he needed her._

" _Let him watch some TV, that could help. You need to distract him. I'll tell him I pick him up after school tomorrow and we do something together. Hopefully that will be good enough. And I will talk to him." He offered a solution that could actually work and she was really grateful._

" _Thank you, I appreciate it."_

 _She handed the phone back to Liam and decided to leave him alone to be able to talk to his dad freely, without her being present._

 _She paid the sitter and thanked her for the help. She really hoped Liam would be able to make friends with her, but he probably needed more time for that. It must have been too much of a change for him compared to their first week together. She should have been more careful._

 _But she really wasn't good at this and she was quite ashamed to admit it even to herself. So far she had Kurt to rely on when it came to parenting, but now she was all alone and basically had to start all over again. And it wasn't going to be an easy ride._

 _When she entered Liam's room again he was sitting on the ground crying, but he seemed a lot calmer now. He was probably trying to make peace with the fact that he would have to stay with her for tonight. She wanted to hug him so badly, but she remembered how he had pulled away just a few minutes ago, so she didn't dare. She didn't want to be rejected again. That would have hurt even more. So she started picking up his things silently, holding back all the tears. She would break down later when she would be alone._

 _She turned the TV on just like Kurt suggested and waited for any reaction from him. After a while his sniffle stopped, so she decided to break the silence._

" _You must be hungry, what would you like to have for dinner?"_

 _It took him a while to respond._

" _Can I have some ice cream?"_

 _On any other day she would have said no, but tonight she was happy to spoil him, as long as he would let her. They would deal with the rest of the problems tomorrow._

o-o-o

Liam's visit left her with conflicted thoughts. She understood him on some level, which was why she hadn't wanted him to find out about the truth just yet. But she wished Liam had thought about what Kurt had told him before rushing there to confront her.

It had been Kurt's decision to contact her after all these years, yet Liam placed all the blame on her, which wasn't really fair. She hadn't encouraged him in any way, in fact she still didn't understand how he was able to forgive her for the past. But she had lived with the weight of her guilt for long enough, it felt good to finally get rid of a reasonable amount. But in her son's eyes she was still the bad guy, and that truly saddened her.

She figured she owed Kurt a call now, to inform him of what happened. And on top of that it crossed her mind that he might be able to make her feel slightly better.

He answered her call after just one ring, which suggested that he may have been waiting for her call and after saying hello she quickly revealed the reason.

"I just wanted to tell you that Liam was here."

She knew she didn't need to explain it any further.

"I hope you understand that I had to tell him everything."

He could also have warned her though, but she didn't hold it against him.

"It's all right, he would have found out eventually."

As much as she wished to have kept it in secret for another while, she also felt slightly relieved that Liam knew. He would have had to deal with it eventually, and that required time.

"What did he say to you?" He sounded very concerned.

"Do you really want to know?" She asked, even though that was why she called him, to tell him what happened and hopefully seek some comfort.

"Of course," he reassured her softly and she really wished he could have been there in person. It would have been so much easier to talk to him while looking into his eyes or even feel his touch.

"He thinks we are making a mistake and that we should both move on. He must have told you something similar," she summed it up rather quickly.

"He did," he confirmed.

"He doesn't understand what's going on, but he's not alone with that," she admitted.

Some of the old feelings surfaced again between them and there was the inevitable attraction. But was it leading anywhere? And most importantly should it be leading anywhere at all? She had no answers to those questions. And probably nor did he.

"I know. You were right, it was too early to tell him, but I had no choice," he explained, not that she needed any further explanation.

"I understand, but now that he knows, we should probably talk to him, together," she suggested. She already feared that conversation, but she was convinced it was necessary.

"Maybe we should give him some time first," he pointed out wisely.

"You are right. But I'm afraid he'll never be able to forgive me for the past. He said I broke your heart." At this point she wished even more for him to be there, so he could have taken her into his arms. It had been too painful to see it in her son's eyes that he still blamed her for everything.

"No one said it would be easy. But you are his mother and he loves you." His words offered comfort, and even though it wasn't enough, she was grateful.

"I wish I knew how to earn his forgiveness, I really want to try." She would do anything, because she really hated the resentment Liam had showed.

"We will figure it out, together."

His offer made her smile. She was grateful that after all this time she wasn't alone anymore. If Kurt had been able to forgive her, hopefully Liam would be able to do the same some day. She only hoped that day wasn't too far away.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

He finally saw the light at the end of this draining trial when she showed up at his place with the good news. The firm's investigator found the evidence they needed to win the case, to prove that he had only made a mistake. The bullet fragment he'd found had been from an earlier crime. And he hadn't been able to find the real bullet because he'd been given a compressed video file of the surveillance tape that skipped the frame that could have helped. On the full version of the video a ricochet was visible on a passing truck, he just needed to find the bullet now to prove that Beltran actually fired that gun.

He was almost off the hook and all thanks to Diane. As she was sharing their discovery with him, his mind was already one step ahead and once she was done, he finally voiced his wish.

"When this is over, let's go away."

Diane couldn't have been more stunned at his out of place and completely unexpected offer.

"Away? What? To where?" She could barely squeeze out those words.

"Costa Rica? Or maybe somewhere else." That was the first place that came to his mind, but he didn't care as long as they would go together. He needed a break after this mess.

"We can't do that." She shook her head with a polite smile. Her answer was exactly what he'd expected, though.

"We can, and we should. Only for a week. You could use some time away and we would have a chance to figure out what's happening with us." He tried to make it all very tempting, but it didn't seem to affect her.

"We don't need to leave for that," she pointed out, but he wasn't going to let it go just yet.

"It might make everything easier, though." He constantly made eye contact with her, hoping he could read from her eyes what she didn't say. She seemed tempted, but something was holding her back.

"Let's get this trial over with first and I promise to think about it." She suggested a compromise he was able to accept. It was slightly better than a no.

"I guess that's good enough," he responded with a smile and when she returned it they both got lost in the moment. "I honestly can't wait for you not to be my lawyer anymore," he breathed out and involuntarily stepped closer to her.

"And why is that?" Her lips curled up even higher, understanding him perfectly.

"Why do you think?" He got even closer now, but was careful not to touch her yet.

"Tell me." She insisted that he would say it out loud, but he had something much better on his mind.

"I'd rather show you." He leaned closer to whisper it to her ear and before she could respond anything he captured her lips in a breathtaking kiss.

She didn't protest this time either, they were alone anyway, and the trial was literally almost over. Soon not even that stupid piece of paper would be standing between them. He honestly couldn't have been happier at this moment. He took her in his arms and planned to keep kissing her until she would let it.

o-o-o

 _He had been waiting for two hours, but she still wasn't there, and she hadn't even called to tell him what was keeping her away. He was getting impatient. Their dinner was cold and he could say the same about his mood. He was tired of her doing this to him and their son over and over again. He was glad it was only him this time, that Liam wasn't there that night. But it also made it worst that her husband mattered that little to her._

 _When the key turned in the door after what felt like an eternity_ _,_ _he didn't even bother to stand up from the couch. The TV was on, and he decided to pretend to watch something interesting, although he was boiling on the inside._

" _Hey, can't believe I'm finally home_ _." S_ _he entered the room, but he didn't even turn his head. "What are you up to? Where is Liam?"_

 _He couldn't believe his ears. It seemed like she had completely forgotten their plans for tonight._

" _At a sleepover," he responded briefly, wondering if that would be enough for her to remember._

" _That's tonight? Oh my god, Kurt, it completely slipped my mind, I'm so sorry. No wonder you are so distant. I know I deserve it. I really have no excuse."_

 _He didn't know what to say, so he just kept staring at the screen. It was the millionth apology he'd heard from her and after a while they just became meaningless. He wished it hadn't come to this, but he had forgiven her so many times already, at some point things needed to change and while waiting for her he'd decided that this was the point_

" _I'm going to sleep in Liam's room tonight," he turned the TV off and stood up from the couch, careful not to make eye contact with her. He didn't want to be influenced in any way._

" _Kurt, please. I know it's late, but I'm here now. We can still spend some time together."_

 _He heard some remorse in her voice, but it didn't affect him. He was angry, hurt and very disappointed. He had wished to spend this evening with her, but somehow that didn't matter anymore. It was too late._

" _Really? You think so?" He was intentionally snarky, and didn't even feel guilty about it. He only wanted to punish her._

" _I know I deserve your attitude, and if you really want to hide from me, be my guest." Her tone changed from begging to resentful way too fast._

" _Look who's offended now," he noted, although he should have just let it go and leave. Did he really want to pick a fight?_

" _I know you don't care about the day I had, so I'll just go to sleep too." That was her solution, and even though he'd been the one who wanted to leave first, she managed to change his mind._

 _She was right, he didn't care what had held her back and that was the sad truth. When did he become so unattached?_

" _You're not getting off that easily." He looked straight into her eyes now, to read what was in them, to determine if it still mattered to him how she felt._

" _I thought you wanted to sleep." She looked confused and also quite guilty, at least there was that, but it didn't make much of a difference to him._

" _I've changed my mind," he shrugged. Going to sleep would have been too easy. He was waiting for something, even though he didn't know exactly what it was._

" _So what now?" She was clearly waiting for something too. And for a moment they just_ _stared_ _at each other. One of them had to take the next step, although he had no idea what it should have been._

" _You tell me." He was still eyeing her, and it seemingly made her uncomfortable, which was exactly what he aimed for._

" _It's obvious that you are mad at me. I already apologized, I don't know what else to say." She sounded honest, but he wished she knew what to say. He wished she could stop this enormous pain that was weighing on him at that moment._

" _I don't need you to say anything, I just need you to do something about it." He helped her out since she seemed very clueless. He tried not to sound too hurt, but he wasn't that good at hiding things from her._

" _But I can't. I tried so many times, but we always ended up right where we are now. I'm tired of apologizing for having_ _the_ _career I've always dreamed of." She never failed to express how important her career was to her, but he was tired of hearing that._

" _And I've been trying to be understanding, but you can't seem to find a place for me in your life anymore,_ _except_ _that I'm the one raising our kid."_

 _Lately they seemed to have ceased to exist as a couple, their conversations mostly centered around Liam and they barely spent any time alone. Except that they were sleeping in the same bed. That's why he had been looking forward to that night. If she had gotten home earlier as they had agreed on, they would have had the chance to spend an evening together. To have dinner and talk and maybe find a solution. But this wasn't the kind of talk he'd had in mind._

" _You are my husband and I love you." It really sounded like a failed attempt from her to appeal to his feelings, but he didn't fall for it. He simply didn't believe her anymore. These were only words._

" _You have a weird way of showing it lately." He couldn't help sounding disappointed._

" _I wish I could promise that things will change soon, but if I want to become a name partner I need to make sacrifices." He really couldn't believe his ears. It sounded like him, their marriage, their family meant nothing to her compared to her career goals._

" _So that's what I am? A sacrifice. Is it really that important to you? More important than me? More important than your son?" He raised his voice in an attempt to wake her. She had to realize how ridiculous she sounded. She couldn't just throw away ten years of marriage like that, could she?_

" _I didn't say that." She tried to back out, but it wasn't enough for him._

" _But that's exactly how you make us feel." He was sad, but he tried not to show it. He didn't want to seem too vulnerable. He didn't want to allow her to hurt him even more than she already had._

" _I really don't want to fight." He wasn't surprised to hear her say that. She wanted to avoid_ _the_ _confrontation and just get his forgiveness like before. But he had forgiven her one too many times._

" _I think it's too late for that now. How much longer do you think I'll sit around to assist you with all_ _of_ _this?" He wasn't sure what got into him saying that, but he didn't even regret it. And that actually frightened him._

" _You want to leave?" She asked with the fear written all over her face_ _,_ _and it crossed his mind that he may have gone too far._

" _I don't know. I just know that this isn't what I signed up for," he sighed and walked out of the room leaving both of them with a lot to think about._

 _Would he be able to leave her? Was that really the only solution? He liked to believe it wasn't. But maybe saying it would open her eyes too. If her career was that important to her that she would let him go, then maybe it was what he had to do._

 _He hadn't expected marriage to be easy, especially not their marriage. But he felt like it didn't mean as much to her as_ _it did_ _to him. It had been different at the beginning when she had been home with Liam, they used to be so happy. But with her going back to work things had slowly started changing._

 _She had wanted to become a partner at the firm, and she had to make sacrifices for that. It had meant spending less time with her kid, and even less with her husband. But at least for a while he had seen that she'd been trying. She had tried to make up for her failures and he had been as forgiving as he could. He loved her after all and Liam needed his mom just as much as his dad._

 _When she had been offered the partnership he couldn't have been more proud of her. He had also hoped it would result in a positive change in their life, but the opposite happened. It had gotten worse and worse. They had seen her even less and as Liam got older he needed her less and less. He had simply gotten used to her not being around and relied mostly only on his dad._

 _But neither of them could have thought they would come this far, that one day he would consider leaving her. And he had to think of their son too. He wouldn't want to do something that would hurt him, even though he was probably already hurt._

o-o-o

"You drop the case."

"That won't happen."

"It will happen. Your client's lucky he's not back in prison."

Diane was verbally sparring with the opposing council in the corridor of the courthouse and Kurt couldn't take his eyes off her. They'd just attended the very last hearing of his case and even the other lawyer had to see that he was losing badly, but he kept fighting her for whatever reason.

"It's not luck. It's the Bill of Rights. Double jeopardy."

"And so he should count himself lucky and go home and watch TV. Because he pushes this trial, he's not only going to lose, he's going to have the police making his life hell."

Kurt was enjoying this conversation probably more than he should have. But who could blame him? Diane was a joy to watch in such situations.

"You want to say that again so I can get that on tape?"

"No, I want to say it again so you can understand my words. You lost. Beltran is guilty and he's not going to make any money from this, because I will make it my life's work to keep him from making money from this. Do you understand me?" She was completely worked up and it suited her so much. She was crashing the other lawyer with every word and every glance.

"This is not the Diane I know," the guy blurted out, but Kurt couldn't disagree more. It was exactly the Diane he knew and loved. She was a fighter and the fact that Kurt was the one she was fighting for made it even better.

"You're right about that. Nice to meet you." Diane basically left the man standing there speechless, while Kurt couldn't take his eyes off her. And he couldn't have been more proud.

"Holy crap, what did just happen?" He whispered to her, trying to compose himself, but it was almost impossible under the circumstances.

"I think you don't need a lawyer anymore," Diane declared her victory joyfully.

"So does that mean I can invite my ex-lawyer over to my house for a celebratory dinner?" He inquired rather too politely.

"Are you sure you meant dinner?" She clearly saw through him, but he didn't mind.

"All I know is that I haven't been so turned on in a while," he admitted leaning close to her so only she could hear his embarrassing confession.

"Then you better drive fast," she instructed him, proving that they were on the same page. "But my place is closer," she added to his satisfaction.

o-o-o

 _He had been thinking about their conversation for days before he would mention it again. He need time to figure out what he really wanted, what would be the best for him and Liam. And as much as it hurt he had come to a solution he thought was necessary at this point._

" _We need to talk about the other night." He visited her in her study one night after Liam had gone to sleep._

" _Okay," she nodded and he could see the fear in her eyes. As if she had known what he was about to say._

 _Truth be told she could have been the one initiating a conversation. She could have surprised him with a gesture, a proof that she wanted to save their marriage, but she hadn't. So he had to be the one making the decision._

" _If you are still saying that nothing's going to change then I'm really not sure what we are still doing here," he admitted something really painful._

" _I wish I could promise something, but I can't." She looked sad too, and as if she had also given up._

" _You can see that this is not working. And I don't know about you, but I'm unhappy." His confession was very sincere, and he didn't doubt that their marriage didn't make her happy anymore either._

" _I'm sorry it has come to this. You've done so much for me, for us. You deserve someone better than me." She basically meant she wasn't good enough for him, and she clearly didn't even try to be anymore. Suddenly he felt so empty inside. It looked like they had both made the same decision._

" _It sounds like you actually want me to leave." He wasn't sure how he was able to say those words. He felt a lump in his throat. It was harder than he'd imagined._

" _Isn't that what this is all about? I'm sure you've already made that decision." She seemed calm, resigned. He was trying to find any sign that it was just as hard for her, but if there were any, she hid them well._

" _You make it sound so easy. Do I really matter that little to you?" He was getting desperate, but he couldn't stand that she appeared so emotionless._

" _Of course not. I told you that I love you." She made eye contact with him, and this time he actually believed her words. They sounded real, unlike the other night. He was relieved to see she still had feelings for him, but he didn't think it could save them anymore._

" _And I told you that I miss you, but you don't seem to care." He had told her that so many times, insisted that something should have changed. But what she had given him one day, she had usually taken away the next._

" _Why don't you just tell me what you came here for?" She was back to being stoic._

" _I think we should spend some time apart. I'm thinking of moving to the farm for a while."_

 _He had thought about this enough, and looked at it as a test. Maybe they would end up missing each other. He knew he would miss her, and could only hope she would feel similarly. Maybe it wasn't too late for something to change._

" _If that's what you want, I won't hold you back." Her words proved that she had thought about it too. She said them all too easily. But when he looked into her eyes, he could swear they seemed misty. She was trying to stay strong, but it was hard on her too._

" _You leave me no choice, Diane." He was trying to make her understand that even though it was his decision it really wasn't an easy one. He didn't want to be labelled as the one who gave up on them and left to escape._

" _I know, I'm sorry. I never meant for this to happen." He remembered her warning all too well, that marriage_ _wasn't_ _for her. Sadly_ _,_ _they had been able to prove that._

" _That's all you have to say?" He still had a tiny bit of hope that she would prevent him from walking out the door. The painful look in her eyes reflected how she might have felt inside. But he wasn't sure it could be compared to his own feelings. Part of him was slowly dying._

" _What do you want me to say? You want me to beg?" She shouldn't have been asking him that, she should have known what to do, what to say to make him stay._

" _I don't," he shook his head. At this point he really was just utterly disappointed in her and wished he could just stop loving her right_ _away_ _, tear her from his heart for once and forever._

" _So you are leaving." It was more of a statement than a question. She seemed frightened and so pale he almost expected her to faint any minute. But he was so heartbroken that he chose not to care. He would go through with his decision, and maybe it would turn out to be the right one._

" _Yes, and I think it would be best if Liam came with me."_

o-o-o

Who knew they were still fit enough for such an intense sexual encounter? Kurt wondered to himself, lying in Diane's bed. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd been in that bedroom, and he wasn't even surprised it didn't look like as it used to. Diane basically changed every piece of furniture and even the paintings on the wall were all new to him. And honestly he didn't mind that there were no reminders of the past in there, which was probably the reason why Diane had changed everything.

Eighteen years had passed since they'd closed that certain chapter of their life. It hadn't been a pretty ending, both of them had suffered a lot due to it. He had most likely suffered more than her, but time had healed those wounds. They weren't the same two people anymore. They had both changed and the circumstances had also changed completely. Only one thing felt exactly the same, his attraction to her and hers to his.

He was convinced that part of the reason for their divorce had been the lack of intimacy between them during the last year of their marriage. She had always been busy and he had basically used it as a punishment that he hadn't made any advances or declined her rare ones. He had also punished himself that way and in the end it had led to their utter disaffection.

But all of those memories had faded by now, as new ones were taking over. He was certain that their passionate lovemaking that day would be remembered by both of them.

"I don't think we should go to Costa Rica, or anywhere for that matter. Liam and Eryn need us." Diane's words brought him back to the present and he tightened his arms around her. It felt so good to hold her freely now. There was no rush, and no rules standing in the way.

"You are right. The trial was so hard on me, I guess I just needed a break." Part of him expected her to say no, but he had proposed the idea anyway. He had nothing to lose.

"It's all over now." She smiled and stroke his arm gently.

"Thanks to you." He returned her smile. He had no idea what he would have done without her in this situation.

"It's over because you did nothing wrong and I never doubted that for a second," she reassured him.

"Thank you for believing in me," he said gratefully and placed a small kiss on her lips. He thought the happiness he felt would be hard to cloud anytime soon, but soon he noticed that her facial expression changed.

"Do you think Liam will ever forgive me?" She asked the question that must have been on her mind constantly since Liam's visit, although they hadn't touched this subject in details after the phone call.

"He will, maybe he already has, he just hasn't realized it yet." Obviously he couldn't speak for Liam, because he wasn't sure about his feelings, but in his heart he wished that was how Liam had felt.

"I know I wasn't the best mother, that I let him down many times. But I always tried my best to be there for him. I never abandoned him, I never hurt him physically, I always made sure he had everything he needed and I have always loved him. How much longer is he going to keep punishing me? I won't live forever." Diane clearly jumped from one emotion to a completely opposite one and all he could do was hold her tighter and be supportive at this moment.

"It's okay, let it all out," he encouraged her.

"He blames me for breaking your heart, but my heart was just as broken. Does he think it was easy for me?" Kurt was aware that she was speaking the truth. He never doubted that she had also suffered, even though she was good at hiding her feelings. Back then it hadn't mattered though. She had hurt him, so he had hurt her, and it had gone on until it had been too much for both of them.

"You two should really talk, I'm sure you can make him understand. And I hope you know I've never said or done anything to turn him against you."

He hadn't been the best at hiding his feelings, but Liam being on his side had always been due to their close connection. Diane hadn't been able to from a similar bond with her son because she hadn't spent enough time with him, and Kurt was sure the divorce hadn't really changed that either.

"I don't doubt that. But you didn't see the way he looked at me the other night," she admitted painfully.

He really wished to help them both, because she hated to see them suffer, especially when the solution was right in front of their eyes. He was also aware that they wouldn't be able to have a real second chance with Diane until Liam didn't get on board.

"He just needs some time, I'm sure he will come around. I'll talk to him again." He offered the only thing he could think of.

"I know I should be the one to talk to him and I will. Whenever he's ready." She seemed calm again. She just needed to let it all out and he was glad to be there for her.

"Do you want me to stay the night?" He didn't want to leave, but it was getting late and he didn't mean to intrude.

She didn't reply right away, which suggested that it wasn't an easy decision for her. Him spending the night would be another step for them and he wished to find out if she was ready for that.

"Yes, stay," she responded after what felt like an eternity, but in the end he didn't have to be disappointed. Instead he was able to kiss her again and hold her tight until the morning would come.


	20. Chapter 20

_A/N: I'm aware that it's been forever since my last update, but I've been meaning to get back to this story, so here is the new chapter. Enjoy! :)  
_

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty**

The slow rhythm of the morning traffic allowed Diane's mind to wander around freely while driving to work the next morning. She was still under the influence of the night she and Kurt had spent together and especially the waking up next to him part. She had to admit that was what she'd missed the most.

His arms tangled around her, holding her as if he'd never wanted to let go. The warmth of his body, pressed against hers. He'd woken her by placing small, soft kisses on the back of her neck, and those spots on her skin were still very sensitive. It had required real strength to leave his arms, his touch and his kisses.

Yet the guilt for saying no to his offer to Costa Rica didn't allow her to be completely happy. She didn't want to disappoint him, and even though he hadn't seemed disappointed, she still felt like she had to make it right somehow.

She meant what she'd told him, that going away for a longer time wasn't a real option for them at this point, but she could definitely make herself free for a few days, a long weekend. He probably wouldn't say no to that.

So by the time Diane arrived at the office, she had the instructions ready for her assistant to arrange everything for the two of them to go away to a place Kurt would most definitely approve of. And she decided to surprise him with it.

"I heard that Beltran's lawyer dropped the case." Will entered Diane's office after a slight knock on the glass door.

"He had no choice," Diane faced her business partner with a smile on her face. She was happy, and had no reason to hide it from a friend.

"I'm glad it all worked out. Your ex seems like a good guy. I'm sorry, I'm not sure if I'm allowed to say that," he added hesitantly.

"He is a good guy." Diane's smile widened as her thoughts went back to the man she'd said goodbye to only an hour ago.

"Also I really like your son, he takes after you." The mention of Liam reminded Diane of the only thing that was missing for her complete happiness, her son's forgiveness.

"Does he?" She inquired proudly.

"The color of his eyes and the shape of his nose."

His statement made her chuckle.

"I hate that he inherited that," she admitted.

"Why? I like your nose," he confessed something that sounded a bit off and made her laugh.

"Uhm, that's a weird thing to say, but thank you." As she stopped laughing she decided to quickly change the subject. "So, listen, is it okay if I take Friday and a weekend off? I'm going out of town for a few days."

"Sure. I mean I'll be in the city. If any of your clients get arrested I'll take care of them," he offered half jokingly, but she knew he had her back anyway.

"Let's hope all of them will behave. And please only call me in case of a real emergency."

She fully intended to dedicate this weekend to Kurt alone, to put him first and really hoped that no work emergency would interfere with her plans.

"Don't worry, I won't call you unless the office building is on fire," he solemnly promised.

"In that case it's probably better if you call the firearms," she reminded him with a chuckle.

"So you don't want to know about a fire? Got it," he chuckled back.

"I knew I can count on you."

 _o-o-o_

" _I think it would be best if Liam came with me."_

 _Diane had barely digested the information that her husband would leave her, when he managed to shock her with his suggestion._

" _You can't be serious." She shook her head in disbelief._

" _I just want what's best for our son." He tried to explain and she didn't doubt his intentions, but she was Liam's mother, she had a say in this too._

" _And you think separating him from his mother is what's best for him?"_

 _Even though she tried not to show it, she was shaken by his announcement. Moments before she had been on the verge of breaking down, but all of a sudden some completely different feelings surfaced._

" _I don't want to separate him from you, I just have more time to look after him, that's all." He tried to soften his tone, as he probably realized he'd gone too far, but it was too late for her._

 _She couldn't control the angry words that blurt out. "If you want to leave, leave, but if you think I will give up on my son you are mistaken."_

" _Just think about it, please. You are barely home. Who would stay with him when I'm not here?" He was begging, but blaming her at the same time. And she decided she'd had enough of that for tonight._

" _You should have thought about that before you suggested the separation." She felt in control for the first time and she wasn't afraid to use it against him._

" _If I hadn't thought about him, I would be long gone." There he was turning the knife in her heart once again and this time it hurt even more._

" _Then go, I'm not stopping you, but he is staying." It was her last word, whether he liked it or not._

" _Don't do this, Diane." He switched back to begging, but it had no effect on her._

" _He is my son too. You can't decide_ _it_ _alone what's best for him." She couldn't believe she had to even say something that obvious._

" _You are right, I'm sorry. Can we at least talk about it?"_

 _That should have been his original suggestion and they wouldn't have ended up here. But they did and she decided she'd heard enough._

" _Your lawyer can talk to my lawyer," she declared firmly and now it was his turn to be shocked by her words._

" _Do you really want to do it this way?" He looked at her with disbelief and sadness in his eyes, but at this moment she didn't seem to be sorry for him._

" _What can I say? You know me." No more explanation was necessary. And he was the one who provoked all this, he could only blame himself that they ended up here. With that an amicable separation was most likely off the table._

" _Yes, I do. I'm going to pack my things and leave in the morning. Unless you want me to leave right away. But I'd like to at least say goodbye to Liam." He accepted her conditions, so she didn't feel that threatened anymore. She could finally breathe again._

" _You can sleep on the couch," she responded a lot softer than before and he turned around to walk out of the room without another word._

 _After the door closed behind him she kept staring at it for minutes. She was unable to process what just happened. All of a sudden their marriage seemed to be over. He may have mentioned separation, but once they brought in the lawyers it would turn into something permanent rather fast._

 _She had expected him to want to leave after their fight the other night, but she surely hadn't counted with him wanting to take their son with him. How could he even suggest that? How could he think she would ever give up on her son? He was the best thing that had ever happened to her. She would fight for him with any means necessary._

 _He made her so angry that she almost forgot how much it all had hurt. She didn't want him to leave, but she also couldn't promise any change. If he couldn't accept the little she had to offer, then it was for the best that he would go his own way and maybe try with someone else. She only held him back. She didn't want to chain him to herself._

 _She would miss him terribly, she didn't doubt that. And she could only blame herself. She had a husband and a kid, she was an equity partner at a prestigious law firm, she shouldn't have wanted more, but she did. She couldn't help it. Having a family may have changed her a bit, but it had only been temporary. Being a wife and a mother hadn't satisfied her fully, and couldn't alter her ambitions. If Kurt had really loved her like he said, he would have understood. But she didn't hold it against him._

 _She closed the files that were lying in front of her, she wouldn't be able to concentrate on work anymore tonight. But she was also scared to leave the safety of her study. She wanted to give him enough time to pack. The image of him putting his clothes in a suitcase brought tears to her eyes. It was really the end and there was nothing she could do about it._

 _As her anger stilled, the pain took over again. She thought she had been prepared, but her body betrayed her. She noticed that she was shaking, and she found herself craving a strong drink to help her through this weak moment. So she poured herself some Scotch, and as the liquid burnt everything inside her, she slowly felt the strength reenter her body._

 _She would get through this, even though she knew it wasn't going to be easy. But she was the strongest woman she knew. She would find her way back to her old self, figure out how to live without him and how to be a good mother to their son._

o-o-o

With her packed suitcase in the back of the car, Diane was on her way to the farm to surprise her…ex-husband? Lover? She wasn't sure what to call him at this moment. But one thing was certain, he was 'her Kurt' and he would always be. It had crossed her mind that she should have given him a warning at least, or ask for his opinion, but she had no doubt that he would be happy about her suggestion and wouldn't say no to it, so she ended up not calling ahead.

As she reached his house she noticed the unfamiliar car in the driveway. What if he had a guest, and she would rudely interrupt their evening? She hadn't even considered this possibility. She began to regret not calling, but she'd already come a long way to just turn back without at least talking to him first.

She got out of the car, walked to the front door, and rang the bell. She forced a smile on her face even though she was a bit nervous now, knowing he wasn't alone, because an extra company would surely ruin the surprise. But when the door opened and a young, unfamiliar woman, probably half Diane's age was facing her, the smile simply froze on her face.

"Oh, I'm sorry,…" Diane mumbled, "I…"

"Are you here to see Kurt?" The redhead asked, while Diane looked her up and down suspiciously.

The woman wasn't dressed too provocatively, and had a sympathetic smile, but the mere fact that she opened Kurt's door suggested that she felt rather comfortable in his home and it bothered Diane.

"Yes," she responded, "I hope I'm not…" interrupting anything, she wanted to add, wondering who the woman could be.

As far as Diane knew, Kurt didn't have any relatives her age, and couldn't think of a good enough reason for her presence.

"No," she answered Diane's unvoiced concern, "Come in," she offered and stepped aside, so Diane could enter the door. She probably should have just turned around and left, but her curiosity took the better of her.

"Diane?" Kurt was coming out of the kitchen with a beer bottle in hand and looked slightly stunned at her sight. His reaction unsettled her even more. She didn't want to think he had anything to hide, but somehow it felt that way.

"Hello, and surprise," she greeted him. This wasn't exactly how she'd imagined this scenario, but it was too late for any regrets.

"Is everything okay? Did I miss your call?" He sounded worried, but she didn't feel like talking to him in the presence of a third person, especially since she had no idea who she was.

"Could we maybe speak in private? Or you know what, I'll call you later, I don't want to interrupt your evening." She was embarrassed. It was possible that she just made a complete fool of herself. This man had spent the previous night in her bed and tonight he was already enjoying another woman's company. A much younger woman's.

"Don't be silly, it's a forty-mile drive from the city." He tried to persuade her, but she's already made up her mind. She needed fresh air, she wanted to leave the room where she felt like she was drowning.

"I was just in the neighborhood and thought I'd stop by, but you have company. I should have called ahead. We'll talk later," she babbled with a lump in her throat and instead of waiting for his answer she simply turned around and walked out the door.

She was cursing on the inside how could she have been so stupid. He was alone with a young woman in his home at this late hour, drinking beer. The situation seemed crystal clear and all she wanted to do was get away from them, from _him_.

She rushed to her car, without breathing in the air she would have needed and wanted to start the engine right away, but her chest became heavy and her eyes started to fill with tears. She realized she was in no state to drive right away, she needed a moment.

o-o-o

 _Liam was watching TV in his room and she was trying to get some work done in her study, when the doorbell rang. It was almost eight, so she couldn't think of a good enough reason for anyone to show up that late. Nevertheless she had a hunch who could have been at the door and she turned out to be right._

" _What are you doing here?" She was facing her husband, who she hadn't seen in three days, and he actually looked as if he hadn't slept that entire time._

 _She wondered if sleeplessness was showing on her too. She'd had a rough couple of days as well, but she had to appear strong for Liam's sake. They hadn't really explained to him what was going on not to scare him._

" _I came to apologize. Can I come in? Please." She saw the fatigue in his eyes, but also the enormous pain, and she didn't have the heart to send him away._

 _She wouldn't admit it, but it was good to see him again. And based on her reaction to his visit it was easy to tell that she still cared about him a lot._

 _She closed the door behind him and noticed that he looked around, probably searching for Liam. She could imagine how much he must have missed his son._

" _He's in his room," she answered his unvoiced question. She would have let him see his son, especially knowing how happy it would have made Liam, who missed his dad terribly. But first she wanted to hear what he had to say. "I'm listening."_

" _I never meant to separate Liam from you. I shouldn't have suggested to take him and I'm really sorry I did. It's something we need to decide together." He'd had just as much time to think about their last conversation as she, and she really liked that he was brave enough to show up and take the first step._

 _This was the Kurt she knew, not the one she'd fought with the other night. And she was scared to admit to herself that she'd probably been the one who'd turned him into that strange person._

" _I appreciate you saying that. I'm sorry too. You've been a great father to Liam and I know we don't need strangers to decide on our son's future." She'd long realized that she had no right to punish him for what had probably been a simple misjudgment on his part. Not to mention she would have punished Liam as well and that wouldn't have been fair._

" _Thank you. So what would be your suggestion?" She was relieved that they were back to being civil, because it was definitely in their and their son's best interest._

" _I think each of us should have him for a week and we take turns. Would you agree to that?" She didn't want to complicate things and really hoped this would work out well on the long term, if their separation turned out to be permanent. That wasn't necessarily what she wanted though._

" _Of course. Thank you," he responded gratefully. A huge weight must have been lifted from his heart._

" _I don't think we need lawyers just yet, we don't have to rush into anything," she wasn't talking about their son anymore and she hoped he understood. She didn't want to give him false hope, but he had been the one who'd suggested a temporary solution for now._

" _No, we don't," he agreed._

 _An awkward silence settled on them and even though both of them could probably have found things to say she chose to keep her thoughts to herself and so did he. It was probably for the best. Only a few days had passed. If they really wanted to put their marriage to the test they needed more time._

 _So instead of telling him how she felt, she chose to talk about a safer topic again, their son._

" _Liam asks about you all the time. He misses you," she revealed, what he could easily guess._

 _Not having his dad around had been hard on Liam. He didn't really understand what was going on and all Diane could tell him was that he would see his father soon. She could already picture the boy's happiness when Kurt would walk in his door._

" _I miss him too," he admitted what was written on his face._

" _You should go and stay with him until he goes to bed and tell him you'll pick him up Sunday afternoon. I'll be in my study."_

 _Her words made him smile and she didn't have to say them twice. He rushed towards Liam's room right away._

 _She intentionally didn't want to witness their reunion, it would have been too heartbreaking for her. She had always known it in her heart that Liam loved his father more than he loved her and she never stopped feeling guilty for letting that happen. She knew she had to be there for her son now more than ever. She had no idea how she would be able to achieve that but she was willing to try._

 _She did hear how happily Liam greeted his father and she quickly closed the door behind her to hide from them. She was relieved they had managed to come to an agreement after all and that they wouldn't end up fighting. It was for the best for everyone involved. And at this point she could even imagine that their separation might not turn into a divorce after all._

o-o-o

She was holding onto the steering wheel so strongly that her nails almost dug a hole into the leather cover. She wished to be able to control her tears, she couldn't allow herself to breakdown. Not here and not now. But it was easier said than done. She still had a hard time breathing and felt her whole body shaking.

Maybe there was a logical explanation to what she had just witnessed, but logic was the furthest from her mind right now. All she knew was that it hurt finding him in the company of another woman, whose face Diane couldn't clear from her mind, no matter how hard she tried. Just like his face when he'd noticed her presence.

She couldn't take this enormous pain she felt, she needed to ease it somehow, let it out. That was the only way to make it slightly better. So she gave up the fight and allowed her tears to fall down freely, covering her face with both hands to hide behind them. She hated herself for being so weak, but she couldn't help it.

Minutes passed until her crying was beginning to wind down and it definitely helped her get a bit calmer. _This was stupid_ , she thought while she tried to dry hear tears. She wasn't sixteen anymore. At that age, crying over a man was still embarrassing, but probably more acceptable than in her age. She wasn't sure what got into her.

She didn't even know or care about the real explanation, she just assumed that the redhead was his secret lover and she managed to surprise them. She remembered him telling her he wasn't seeing anyone, and she'd believed him. She should have talked to him first, let him explain instead of jumping into conclusions on her own.

A sudden knock on the window of the passenger seat frightened her. She looked in the direction where she saw Kurt's face. Fortunately it was almost dark outside, but she wasn't sure how long he could have been standing there. He could have witnessed her breakdown and she hadn't even noticed.

"Diane, would you let me in?" He begged, and she had another choice to make like before. Her head told her to start the car and leave, but her heart was unable to obey. She had to hear him out, give him a chance to explain what was going on. And in the end she would decide whether she believed him or not.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-One**

After Diane rushed out the door, it took Kurt about a minute to get over his initial shock.

"Do you want me to leave?" Miranda reminded him of her presence, while his mind was following the other woman outside. He knew he couldn't let her leave like that.

"I'm sorry, but yes. We will arrange something for next week." He wasn't really sorry, he just wanted to be polite. The only person he was feeling sorry for was the one who'd just left his house, thinking god knows what about this scenario.

"Sure. I didn't want to step in the middle of anything." She probably understood the seriousness of the situation, not that she had to really care.

"I know, don't worry about it." He was tired of this pointless talk, all he wanted to do was get rid of Miranda, so he could focus on Diane.

"Is she…? I'm sorry, it's none of my business."

He didn't have the time to explain, nor thought he owed the girl an explanation. There was only one person he owed an explanation and he needed to make sure she didn't leave before she heard him out.

"I gotta go," he mumbled and rushed out the door.

Diane's car was still in the driveway, she hadn't started it, so he decided to approach it slowly. He didn't want to ambush her, he was only determined to not let her leave.

It was already dark outside, so he couldn't see her properly. He wanted to give her some time, but not too much time. He didn't want her to jump into unnecessary conclusions.

He approached her car from the side of the passenger seat and peeked inside to see what she was up to. The sight made his heart wrench, because he could see that she was actually crying. He backed away, not wanting her to notice him. He knew she wouldn't want him to see her like that. He decided to give her some space and time, while the guilt began to eat him inside.

It was his fault that she was crying right now. Maybe he hadn't caused it intentionally, but he also hadn't done anything to prevent it. It would have been so easy to introduce Miranda, and clear up the tension. If only Diane hadn't shown up so unexpectedly. He hoped to still find out why she was there that night, but first he needed to deliver an explanation.

He approached the window again and noticed that Diane was already calmer. He figured this was the right moment to announce his presence, so he knocked on the window.

"Diane, would you let me in?" He asked with worry in his voice. He hoped it wasn't too late, that he could still change her opinion about this situation, even though it seemed like she'd already made up her mind. She looked really hurt and he hated seeing her like that.

For a short while she was eyeing him, probably torn on what she should do. He only hoped she would make the right decision.

o-o-o

 _Traffic was especially slow that morning and he already knew he would be late for his appointment. No wonder he'd always hated big cities, and Chicago was on the top of his list. Having lived there for several years and keeping some fond memories couldn't really change this fact. At least his cab bill was taken care of by his client, so he didn't have to drive himself. He wouldn't have had the patience for this madness._

 _To kill time, he was observing the mostly unfamiliar buildings around them. These skyscrapers served as another reason for his disaffection. He could never get used to them. They hid the streets of the city behind their endless shadows._

" _Asshole," the driver yelled, as he stepped on the breaks. They hadn't even been driving that fast, but Kurt still jumped in his seat._

 _Another car abruptly stopped in front of them, and a really elegant woman stepped out from the passenger seat. She was wearing a fancy coat and hiding behind large sunglasses. The slight wind started playing with her shoulder-length blonde hair, and she was unable to control her locks even though she tried._

 _Kurt couldn't believe his eyes, since the woman so close to him on the street was none but his ex-wife. It's been a while since he'd last seen her and he hadn't thought too much about her lately either. It was ironic how he happened to bump into her of all people in such a big city._

 _Needless to say he couldn't take his eyes off her, as she walked to the driver's side of the car and leaned closer to the open window._

" _Are they serious?" The cab driver noted annoyed at the sight, while Kurt tried to figure out what was going on. "Are they really making out in the middle of the morning traffic?"_

 _Kurt wasn't really sure if that was what they were doing, but if so this wasn't how he wanted to find out about Diane seeing another man. The whole situation felt rather ridiculous. Especially because his curiosity awakened at once. Was Diane really kissing that man in the middle of the street? That actually didn't sound like her, but after all this time could he still state that he knew her well? He wasn't sure._

 _Once the couple was done with whatever they had been doing through the window, he observed Diane walking towards one of the skyscrapers. She was most likely heading to work, and the fact that a man had dropped her off made him assume that she'd probably spent the night with him. He wasn't sure how this realization affected him. He and Diane had been over for long, so he definitely didn't feel straight out jealousy, but it was disturbing nevertheless._

 _Throughout their marriage he hadn't really been the jealous type. He was aware that his – now ex – wife was an attractive woman, and other men must have noticed that too. But he never really had a reason to be jealous of her, just like he'd given her no reason to be jealous of him._

 _Knowingly most marriages come to an end due to infidelity on either or both sides, but it hadn't been like that in their case. It hadn't been another man separating him from Diane, it had been her career standing in the way of their happiness._

 _Which made it even harder for him to move on after the divorce papers had been signed. He still loved her and couldn't imagine falling for anyone else anytime soon. He imagined it could have been easier for her, although he wished to believe the opposite. Truth was that, during the long months of their separation, he'd never really given up the hope that she would come to her senses and realize that their family was what really mattered._

 _Unfortunately, they had ended up signing those papers, and the only connection he had left with her was through their son. He had no choice but to bury all his hopes deep inside him and start a brand new chapter of his life. But somehow she kept showing up in this new chapter to remind him of what he'd been forced to leave behind._

 _Fortunately, his cab driver was mad enough at Diane's mystery man, and managed to overtake his fancy car. This way Kurt had an opportunity to take a peak at the 'competition', so to speak. He wasn't even surprised that the guy was a man in a suit, probably a businessman or maybe another lawyer. Maybe these kind of men were really her type and that's why their marriage had never worked out. Maybe she needed someone who were in the same shoes as her, who understood._

 _Although he couldn't help but admit that – just like the driver had mentioned - the guy definitely seemed like an asshole._

o-o-o

Once he was able to open the car door, he sat next to her in the passenger seat.

"Thank you for letting me in," he addressed her silently. And when she didn't respond, he quickly gathered his thoughts to tell what he came for. "Miranda is a student from my ballistics class. She is one of the best, so I'm giving her private lessons. I should have introduced her right away, but you managed to surprise me with your visit. I'm really happy you came, though, you need to know that."

He noticed that he was almost babbling. It was because he felt quite uncomfortable talking, while she had no reaction to any word he'd uttered. She simply stared at him, so he couldn't decide whether or not she believed him. She had to, though, because he was telling the truth.

When he paused, all she did was tilt her head to hide her face from him. This didn't look promising. It crossed his mind that maybe he was trying too hard, but it was important to him not to have any misunderstandings between them.

"Diane," he called her name and waited until she was looking at him again. Her face was difficult to read, but from her silence he concluded that she was still expecting something, so he carried on with the explanation.

"I'm aware that this situation can be easily misinterpreted, but I want you to know that I have nothing to hide from you."

Her silence was becoming very awkward and he wanted to know so badly what was going on inside her, but she didn't give it away.

"Diane, please," he begged her, desperate for any reaction, but she seemed unattached.

That's when he realized that he had to go deeper, he had to make her understand what he was really going through.

"I came back to your life because I wanted to be with you, I didn't come back to hurt you," he declared, because that was really the last thing he wanted.

At this point he noticed that tears started rolling down her face again, and she looked away, probably ashamed. This wasn't exactly the reaction he'd been hoping for, but he still took it as a sign that he was able to finally get to her. He didn't fully understand the reason for her tears, but it pained him to see her like this. So he did what his heart told him to do, he tried to comfort her by placing his hand on hers slowly. Only when she didn't pull it back, did he feel a bit of relief.

He waited patiently until she would look at him again, wishing he could wipe away all her tears. So he uttered the most important words, those he had to have kept inside all these years.

"I love you, Diane."

Despite the unfortunate situation it was liberating to finally admit his feelings. And even though hearing his words increased the intensity of her tears, he wasn't sure that was a bad thing anymore. He placed his palm on the side of her face to wipe the tears and he finally saw her lips curl up a bit. That's how he was able to tell that these were already happy tears.

"I think it's pretty obvious that I love you too," she confessed trying to hide her chuckle of embarrassment.

Just to hear her talk after such a long silence already made him happy, but to hear those three words meant everything to him. He'd been fantasizing about this moment for so long, and even though this hadn't been how he'd imagined the situation, the happiness he felt was incomparable.

He didn't need to say anything more, he just wrapped his arms around her to hold her tight. She needed to feel loved, especially at this moment. And beside words, he was willing to show her with actions too. He was relieved that she wasn't crying anymore, instead she was holding him just as tight.

Their hug was only disturbed by the sound of a car leaving the driveway, which meant they were finally all alone. And there was nothing else he really wanted.

o-o-o

 _Running into Diane and her possible lover had been on Kurt's mind a lot in the weeks after the incident. He simply couldn't get them out of his head no matter how hard he tried. He even considered talking to Liam about it, maybe find out more. He knew he had to be careful though, because Liam would probably find it suspicious if he showed too much interest in his ex's private life. It was a topic they barely touched throughout the years._

 _So next time Liam was on the farm for dinner, Kurt decided to casually bring up Diane in the conversation, hoping he wouldn't end up regretting it._

" _I saw your mom the other day, a man dropped her off at work." He decided to spare him the unnecessary details about what the two had done exactly. Even though he still couldn't be sure what had really happened, he accepted what the driver had assumed as the truth by now, that Diane and the guy had actually kissed._

" _Did you talk to her?" Liam inquired casually. He didn't seem to mind that Kurt had brought up the topic._

" _Nope, I was on my way to an appointment. Have you talked to her recently?" He wasn't exactly sure how the relationship between mother and son was going._

" _Not since her birthday," Liam admitted and Kurt couldn't help rolling his eyes. "Why are you looking at me like that?" Liam inquired, noticing the unpleasant reaction._

" _You know why," Kurt pointed out and left it at that, for now._

" _Do you think he's seeing someone?" Liam quickly changed the subject, and Kurt actually didn't mind, since Liam led them back to the topic that had kept him occupied a lot lately._

" _It's possible," he responded, trying to seem unattached. His son knew him well, and he didn't want to give away that seeing Diane with another man actually affected him more than he cared to admit._

" _I don't know how I would feel about that," Liam confessed something that was very close to how Kurt was feeling._

" _You just admitted you haven't talked to her in two months," Kurt reminded him of the controversy. Sometimes Liam was trying to let him believe he didn't care for his mother that much, but he couldn't fool him. They may not have had the best mother-son relationship, but he didn't doubt how Liam really felt about Diane._

" _I know, I'll give her a call," the boy promised to Kurt's relief._

 _Kurt had always insisted that, no matter what had happened between him and Diane, Liam shouldn't have taken sides. And even though Liam could never really hide that he favored his father, Kurt had been careful not to use it to his advantage._

" _How would you feel about her dating someone?" Liam managed to ask something that really got to Kurt. He'd spent the last days trying to give an answer to this question, yet he didn't come any closer to an acceptable one. All he was able to figure out was that it unsettled him more than it should have._

" _It's none of my business," he provided the only acceptable answer. It shouldn't matter to him anymore whether Diane was alone or with an asshole. Yet it still did._

" _And what about you? Are you dating someone?" Liam chose to move to a slightly different territory._

" _Not really," Kurt admitted. He had tried, Liam knew that he had tried hard, but his efforts to find_ the one _had always failed._

" _Dad, you've been divorced for so long and you only had one semiserious relationship ever since. Do you plan to stay alone forever?" Liam had always been very encouraging of his father's love life, because he wanted to see him happy, and Kurt appreciated the support._

" _I don't have a plan," he shrugged. It wasn't like he was desperate to find anyone, or determined to stay alone. He would let life take its course._

" _Maybe if mom finds someone, you'll finally accept that it's over." Liam wasn't far from the truth at all, but Kurt figured it was better not to get deeper into this subject._

" _I don't know what you're talking about," Kurt stated, and even though he couldn't really mislead Liam, he could at least count on the boy's tactfulness._

" _All right, but if I find out anything about mom and that guy, do you want me to tell you?" Liam offered something Kurt would have loved to jump on, but he decided not to show more interest than he already had._

" _It's not that important," he reassured him, regardless if Liam believed him or not. "But call her," he insisted, "I'm sure she misses you."_

" _I promise," Liam responded with a smile._

 _Kurt was so grateful for this relationship with his son, that it had only gotten deeper throughout the years. They could always count on each other and an occasional distance wasn't able to change that either. Yet Liam and Diane had been mostly physically close, but far in spirit. No matter how hard Kurt had always tried to build a bridge between them, they weren't able to connect the way mother and son were supposed to. But Kurt never gave up the hope that one day this could change for the better._

o-o-o

Once he noticed that her breathing got even, he distanced himself from her. He was relieved that she believed him, and that he managed to calm her. He didn't blame her for getting upset over the situation. In fact – like she said – it only showed that she loved him and that made him unbelievably happy. He hadn't heard her say those words in so long, he'd almost forgotten the feeling.

"We should go back inside," he suggested, "unless you insist on leaving."

"I do insist on leaving," she responded with a smile. He was confused about what made her lips curl up, since her reaction contradicted with his feelings about her statement.

"Oh, okay," he pretended to accept her decision.

"With you. I actually came to take you with me," she revealed the reason behind her mysterious visit.

"Take me where?" His face cheered up due to the unexpected good news.

"Well, that is the real surprise," she responded with a bright smile.

"All right?" he chose to let it go and play by her rules. "Do I need to bring anything?" he inquired, just to be safe.

"Yeah, you should pack a few things, because we aren't coming back until Monday," she informed him casually.

"I love the sound of that," he declared with enthusiasm. He couldn't have been more pleased that this evening had taken a turn for the better.

"I'll wait here," she said silently, but he refused to leave her in a car after what had happened. He didn't want to lose sight of her now that they were going to spend the whole weekend together.

"She left. We are alone. Please come back inside. You could help me pack," he tried to persuade or tempt her.

"As far as I remember you are perfectly capable of doing that on your own," she chuckled, and from the unserious tone he assumed that she was willing to change her mind.

"Please." He used the word he thought to be the most convincing.

"All right. Let's go then." She gave in to his wish in the end.

"But not before this."

He leaned forward and, sooner than she could respond, he pressed his lips to hers. He'd been craving that kiss since the morning, and now that she was there and all the misunderstandings had been cleared between them he was allowed to enjoy the moment.

As their kiss deepened, he pulled her back in his arms. If it had been up to him he wouldn't have let her go anytime soon. He wanted to feel the love she had already confessed, and her kiss convinced him that she had been telling the truth. The only reason he was able to pull away from her in the end was the promise of a lot more of these intimate moments between them tonight, and on the rest of the weekend.

He couldn't believe that she was there, that she was there to take him away. Last night she had turned down his offer to go away, yet here she was a day later suggesting the same. He didn't care where, he would follow her anywhere.


	22. Chapter 22

_A/N: I know that a lot of you have been waiting impatiently for this chapter. I think you'll find that it was worth the wait. It even got a little smutty in the first part, not sorry for that :P_

 _Thank you to everyone for the lovely comments on here and on twitter. Hope you'll continue to enjoy this stoy._

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Two**

The cabin was far from everything and wouldn't normally be Diane's number one choice for a vacation, but she had chosen it to please _him_. And as things were standing between them, she had to admit to herself that this was exactly what they needed. There was so much to discuss and, on top of it, they had to make up for many years of lost intimacy. They had to put their newly found bond to the test, and this seemed like the perfect opportunity.

"I know it's not Costa Rica," Diane noted as they looked around inside.

The house was small and the furniture was rather simple. Yet it was clean and nicely decorated. And from the windows all they could see was the forest.

"I love it," Kurt cut her off and folded his arms around her waist. "You knew I would love it," he added with a smile.

"I had a hunch," she admitted, returning his smile.

"Thank you. Can't believe I almost ruined it all," he referred to what had happened at his house a few hours earlier. But she just wanted to forget, so she placed her pointing finger on his lips to silence him.

"Ssssh, let's not dwell on that any longer," she insisted.

Maybe she'd let him off easily, but she had no reason to doubt his words either. There was still a lot they didn't know about each other's lives, which was why they needed to spend more time together.

"You know if I wasn't curious about our destination, I wouldn't have let you leave my house without…" he stopped in the middle of the sentence, but his eyes never left hers.

"Without what?" she let out a small chuckle.

"Without doing this," he leaned closer and placed his lips hungrily on hers. She didn't need much convincing either, her lips responded just as vehemently. "And this," he pushed her blazer on the ground with one firm move. "And this," he reached for her blouse and pulled it from under her skirt. And she didn't even think of protesting.

"I'm all yours. For three whole days," she responded between kisses, while she grabbed his belt to catch up with his hasty moves.

"And nights," he added, pushing her to the nearest wall.

He unbuttoned her blouse and began to place kisses all over her chest, while she dug her nails to his shoulders. He appeared to be unstoppable, and she didn't even try to slow him down. She wanted him just as much as he seemed to want her. Soon her skirt was also laying on the ground and he began to roll her stockings down, while kissing his way along her thighs.

She felt as the solid ground was shaking underneath and she couldn't wait for him to touch her on her most sensitive spot. She was ready for him in every sense and he soon felt it with his own two fingers.

The satisfied groan that followed brought a barely audible chuckle to her lips that were quickly took over by his eager ones. That was also her chance to finally rid him from his shirt and pants, and she did it in a hurry. She wanted him to finish what he started as soon as humanly possible.

And she didn't mind that it was her up against a wall, even though the bed was only a few steps away in the tiny room. She loved the way he wanted her and enjoyed every second of their passionate union.

And made advantage of the fact that no one but him would hear her scream.

o-o-o

 _Her nails were tapping on the table impatiently, while she was sipping her drink. For once she'd managed to get away earlier from the office on a Friday, still she was drinking alone in a bar. Something was wrong with this picture. She just felt like she needed an evening out and with Liam spending the night at a friend's house she didn't even have to rush home to her child, even though it was her week with him._

 _She wasn't sure how but from her son her mind jumped to his father. They were already a few months into their separation, which began to seem rather permanent. It was probably only a matter of time until one of them would serve the other with the divorce papers, and there's nothing either of them wanted to do about it. Or was there?_

 _Truth be told they hadn't talked properly ever since he'd left. They stayed in touch, they discussed everything related to Liam, but nothing related to them. It was over, or at least very close to be over. Yet here she was on a Friday night, drinking wine and thinking of him._

 _By now she knew what it meant to live without him. It had been very challenging at first, especially because of Liam. She had to learn how to be a single mom, without having him to rely on. But beside being a mother, she was also a wife and that part of her life completely ceased to exist. She had to get used to sleeping alone in their bed, among other things. And even though she was adjusting to her reorganized life, there was one thing she couldn't control; her dreams. And it often happened that she dreamt about him._

 _Some of these dreams were them fighting - it was arecurring theme - and whenever she woke up after such an unsettling dream, she almost always teared up. It still hurt, even if it wasn't real anymore._

 _There were dreams that made her smile, and reminded her of the good times. And there were others that she quickly tried to push to the back of her mind. Not because they were bad, she would rather have called them embarrassing. She was pretty sure it wasn't normal to have inappropriate dreams of her separated husband, but there was not much she could do about them._

 _She checked the time on the clock on the wall, then her eyes found the payphone underneath. Maybe it wasn't the worst idea in the world to call him, was it? They needed to talk eventually and tonight parenting wasn't getting in the way of that. But then she remembered where she was. A bar wasn't exactly the right place to call him from. What would he think of her? She needed to go home, clear her head a bit after the drink, then give him a call._

 _But when she thought of actually calling him, she realized she may have needed another drink for that. What would she say? And how would he take it? Would he even be willing to listen to her? She wasn't even sure._

 _She ordered another glass of wine that she consumed rather hastily, she was already nervous. Then she called a cab to head home, but she quickly changed her mind. She might end up regretting it later, yet she decided to give the cab driver different directions. And in a few minutes she was already on her way out of the city._

o-o-o

They had no urgent reason to even get out of bed, so she really appreciated the breakfast tray he'd made for them on their first morning in the cabin. Especially considering that they had completely forgotten about dinner the previous night. Which was understandable under the circumstances.

The memories of their out-of-control lovemaking made her blush and she had to make sure not to stare at him too much while he approached the bed. It probably wasn't worth it to skip another meal, they had all the time in the world for each other.

"I wish I could make you breakfast every morning," he noted as he got back next to her, placing the tray on their lap.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," she reminded him with a smile. She didn't want to ruin the moment though.

"Sorry, I guess I just forgot how it feels to be happy," he admitted what she also felt.

She didn't want to be anywhere else this moment. "I know what you mean," she confessed and placed a soft peck on his lips. She wouldn't have minded spending the next three days with him tangled up in this bed, wearing nothing but his shirt and let him take it off as often as he wanted.

"I feel like we have wasted so many years," he concluded with a sigh, but she refused to be pulled down from her high.

"And we already started to make up for it," she reminded him, not that he needed any reminder of their passionate night. If the walls around them could talk, they would have a lot to share.

"I could have lost you to some rich guy in a suit," he pointed out and she didn't understand why he was having such odd thoughts all of a sudden.

"Yeah, I know a lot of those," she tried to joke it off, but he was staring at her with a different expression.

"I'm serious," he insisted, but she didn't want him to be that way. She wanted to pull him back to their happy present.

"What's the matter? I'm here, _with you_." She grabbed his hand and kissed his palm gently. She wished to blow away those dark clouds from his mind.

"I'm sorry, this is so stupid. I don't know what got into me," he finally entered their reality again and returned her kiss by placing one on the back of her hand.

"It's okay, you can tell me anything," she reassured him. She wanted things to be different this time around. They only had one second chance and wasting it wasn't an option for her either.

"I love you and I don't want to waste another day." His declaration of love over the breakfast tray felt a bit out of place, but she didn't mind. She returned his words and agreed with them wholeheartedly.

And at that moment neither of them had any doubts what they would be doing after breakfast.

o-o-o

 _She wanted to tell the driver to stop and turn around so many times along the way, but she never uttered a word. Not until they arrived at their destination where she paid and let him leave. She saw that Kurt's car was in the driveway, and the lights were on in some rooms of the house, so she didn't come out here in vain. She only had to mentally prepare herself to approach the front door and ring the bell._

 _She hadn't even realized how late it was until she checked her wristwatch. She didn't think Kurt would already be asleep, but he probably wasn't expecting any visitors anymore either. Yet she was there, determined to disturb his evening._

 _It took him a while to answer the door and the look on his face couldn't have been more confused when he spotted her._

" _Did something happen to Liam?" he blurted out instead of a greeting. He probably couldn't think of any other reason for her to be there, in person, and she didn't blame him._

" _No, he's at a sleepover. I called the parents of the kid he's staying with about an hour ago, and they told me Liam was having a great time." She wanted to show him how much she'd improved on the parenting front. Not that it should have mattered to him anymore._

" _That's good to know," he noted without any kind of reaction shown on his face, which made her even more uncomfortable._

" _Can I come in?" she inquired bluntly._

" _Sure," he shrugged and turned around, so she could follow him inside._

 _He sat down at the dining room table and grabbed the beer bottle in front of him to drink from it. She walked closer, but she would rather have run away._

" _Want some?" he asked, seemingly out of politeness, and given his behavior she already regretted showing up. He was clearly not pleased to see her._

" _No, thank you." She'd had a drink too many earlier, she needed the rest of the clarity in her mind to get this conversation over with._

 _She sat down as well, across from him, and a long moment of silence settled on them, while she tried to avoid his eyes._

 _She'd planned to talk to him, but she had no idea what to say. Then why the hell was she there? He clearly didn't want her there either. This situation was a lot more awkward than she could have imagined._

" _He can't take that book down," she noted and glanced at him to see his reaction, but all he did was raise an eyebrow. "The one he got from you, about the dragons. He carries it everywhere," she explained._

 _This was their safe topic, their son, so she cowardly found back to it. Also she knew it was a way to soften him a bit and she needed that._

" _I've already bought the second volume," he responded in a warmer tone, so she figured her tactic was working out._

" _I'll have to make room for that in his schoolbag too, then." She almost smiled, even though the ice wasn't completely broken yet._

" _I promised to take him to an exhibition if he does well in biology class." She already noticed the barely visible proud smile on his face._

" _That's basically all he talks about," she let out a chuckle and silently begged for his lips to finally curl up too. Until they did._

" _I just realized I never said hello," she started over nervously._

" _Hello," he answered, still smiling, then waited for her to continue, but she couldn't say a word. "I could use some direction here, what exactly is this? Why are you here?"_

 _She appreciated his encouragement, but it wasn't as easy as she had imagined. She was sitting so close to him, to the man who kept showing up in her dreams. She was able to breathe in his scent, to look into his familiar eyes. He was right in front of her and it would have been easy to touch him._

 _But she wasn't allowed to do that. She'd had her chance and she'd screwed it up. She'd made the decision to let him go, yet here she was visiting him in the middle of the night. She had no right to screw with his head, to give him any false hope, but she couldn't stop herself from blurting out the following words._

" _It's me missing you," she whispered, shifting her gaze on the table for a few seconds. "Please don't think more into this," she looked back at him, "I still can't promise you any change, but somehow tonight, I ended up on your doorstep." It was embarrassing to lay all her cards down right up front, but she didn't want to deceive him._

" _I appreciate your honesty." He responded, with a confused expression on his face._

" _You are welcome to send me away." She gave him a way out. She knew what she was doing to him wasn't fair. She didn't want to hurt him, and if she stayed, that would probably be the result._

" _It's a forty-mile drive. The least I can do is hear you out."_

 _She was grateful for his generous offer, that was already more than she could have hoped for._

" _Here's a thing, I'm not sure I came here to talk," she admitted in a faint voice, and couldn't believe her own words._

 _What the hell was she doing? She wasn't allowed to play with him like this. She wouldn't have been surprised if he had taken offence at her behavior and that was exactly what he did. He immediately tensed and moved back in his chair to be further away from her. They had been doing so well, but she managed to screw it up again. She would have loved to know what was going on in his head, but she was unable to read him at the moment._

 _Until he spoke again._

" _So you just expect me to do what? Cater to my horny wife?" He sounded angry, and she couldn't blame him for it. But now it was her turn to take offence at the expression he used._

" _You don't have to be mean," she pointed out silently, even if she knew she deserved his tone and he wasn't wrong about his assumption. It was time she admitted it to herself what she'd really come here for tonight._

" _I'm sorry. You tend to bring out the worst in me," he added with a small chuckle and she sighed with relief that his anger vanished just as fast as it had come._

 _He was right, they often managed to bring out the worst in each other._

 _He still eyed her confused, that's how she knew she had really managed to surprise him and not in the best way. But the cards were on his side of the table now._

" _I apologize for disturbing your evening. I'll call the cab back and leave," she offered, to make the decision easier for him. All he had to do was let her leave and they could forget this conversation ever happened._

 _She stood up, ready to obey her own words, but before she could step away, he grabbed her wrist. His touch wasn't soft, but it wasn't too tight either. She slowly turned her head in his direction and they began to stare at each other. Whether they were enemies or friends at this moment she couldn't guess, but there was a reason why he kept her from leaving and she was waiting impatiently to hear it from his mouth._

o-o-o

Surprisingly it hadn't been her, but him who had to make a quick phone call at some point, so while he talked to their son, Diane took a short walk around the cabin. The weather was a bit chilly due to the wind, but she enjoyed breathing in the fresh air and stretch a little.

She was still in earshot, when she heard him come out of the house, so she started walking backwards. When he spotted her, he took a few steps in her direction as well until they were standing right in front of each other.

"He wanted to come over, so I had to come up with an excuse." He didn't look pleased, which was understandable under the circumstances.

"I'm sorry you had to lie to him because of me." She felt guilty for doing things behind Liam's back again, but his opinion on this matter was more than clear to both of them.

"We agreed to give him some time," he reminded her, taking her hands in his.

"I just hope he won't take long." She couldn't hide from him how much it worried her. She needed her son's blessing, but most importantly she needed his forgiveness.

"Me too, I want him to share our happiness." He seemed a lot more hopeful and she envied that.

"I'm afraid the damage our divorce caused cannot be so easily undone." Now it was her turn seeing those dark clouds and hopefully his to pull her back, so she held onto his hands tighter.

"We've always wanted what was best for him." He kept the positive tone and she was grateful for that. They seemed to be taking turns, but they managed to balance each other perfectly.

"Until now. Maybe we are being selfish." She hated the places her mind went right now, so she didn't even think of letting go off his firm hands.

"He isn't a kid anymore. He has his own life to live and we have ours." His chain of thought made a lot of sense and she slowly began to tone down those voices in her head and focus on him.

She observed him for a few seconds, noticed the traces of age on his face and the hope in his eyes. His eyes were exactly the same as she remembered and she saw her own reflection in them.

"Are you sure this, _us_ is what you really want?" She had to ask, even though she had no doubt about his answer.

"Yes," he responded with a word that didn't leave a single doubt in her mind.

"Then we shouldn't go behind his back. He should know the whole truth, so he can deal with it." This was her final decision and she immediately felt good about it. If she ever wanted to get her son's forgiveness and support, this was the only way.

"Are you ready for that?" His question was justified, but she felt a lot stronger now than a few minutes earlier.

"I need to be. He's an adult, we can't keep protecting him forever," she stated confidently.

She was unable to predict how this would work out with Liam, but she was certain it was the right attitude. Their son had a right to know exactly what was going on.

"We will deal with it together," he pressed her hands encouragingly. He seemed to be happy about her decision and probably relieved.

"We will," she responded with a faint smile, then let go off his hands and wrapped her arms around him to hug him tight, and soon he pulled her even closer to him.

They were an item again, after all these years. It felt natural, just like she remembered. He was still the same man she had been able to count on in the past. But she wasn't the same woman. She had changed. She had suffered and she had learnt from it. And hopefully she would be able to prove this both to him and to their son. And maybe someday they would become a family once again.


End file.
